ADHD to autism...?

[forkeeps251]

I would be extremely cautious with this. If you make a threat you have to be ready to follow through or you will lose tons of credibility. And if he hates being at class so much he is ready to hurt himself to get out, do you really think embarrassing him and making him a subject of teasing from other kids for years to come (and kids do not forget, when I was at High School, there was a guy called Puke by everyone because he had been so scared on his first day of Kindergarten that he puked in class...) Because lets face it, helmet will not make him stay in class. Even if teacher allows him hit his head in peace with helmet, he will find another way to get himself out from there. He can bite himself, throw a chair, hit the kid next to him or scream from the top of his lunges. He will get himself to principal's office if he wants to. By the way I have embarrassed my kid in front his peers to make him stay at school. Really didn't work. I would love to take those times back.

Your problem is not that he hits his head to get out of class. It is that he hates being in class so much. 6-year-olds don't cut class to get to have a cig in restroom, or to appear cool to their friends, or because they are lazy. 16 would be a different matter, but if 6-year-old hates school so much that he does anything to get away from it, problem has to be solved in some other way than punishing the child (again, been there, done every possible mistake on that, not feeling too proud of myself nowadays because of that.)

I agree with you. I *know* that I shouldn't make threats that I don't follow through with, and I really wouldn't follow through with it. I can't imagine, with his self esteem issues, what sending him to school in a helmet would do to him. Nothing good would come from it, but I was (am) frustrated and out of ideas.

I did email the school district, basically saying that his current situation is not working and asking if there are any other programs, regardless of a diagnosis, that would help me... like a small class size, social skills traning, etc. I know there aren't in HIS school, but that there are in other schools. His current school has tried to discourage that though, for some reason. I didn't email his school directly though, but the special services department of the whole district. I know they probably go by what their school psychologist says, who has observed difficult child now twice. I haven't heard back from her after the second evaluation, but her first one didn't say anything about autism spectrum. It is only the private psychiatric's who have mentioned it.

 

[SuZir]

I agree with you. I *know* that I shouldn't make threats that I don't follow through with, and I really wouldn't follow through with it. I can't imagine, with his self esteem issues, what sending him to school in a helmet would do to him. Nothing good would come from it, but I was (am) frustrated and out of ideas.

With that I can so sympathize. Mine is luckily now adult and currently out of school, taking gap years to try to pursue his sport dreams, but his school years were horrible. And unfortunately there was never a good solution. Or well, moving three hours away from his school, when he was 17, studying everything independently and only going school once a month to take exams did work in the end. Mine didn't only arrange his way out from class, he literally run away from school (even outrunning his aide when he had one), was several time looked by police because of that, once a river was drag and searched because he was missing and not to be found. There was times he was truant much more than at school. It was simply horrible and I certainly don't have answers how to solve school issues. I do have laundry list of what not to do, though. And buckets full of sympathy.

Do your area have advocates or support groups for Autism Spectrum Disorders (ASD)/ADHD/other special needs-families? That could be a possible way to find out what programs and resources are available in your area and schools. It isn't uncommon for schools not really volunteer all that information. Also some experience based information from those programs is never bad thing to hear. At times things look very different in paper than in class room...

 

[buddy]

I would not ask any longer. They are using punishment in the form of time out to convince him to stay, they don't get it. That's a common gen Ed/administrative approach.

Request everything in writing. Certified mail. Ask for an fba (functional behavior analysis) and an iep meeting to discuss level of service (time in a Special Education room or changing to a sp Ed school.

Let then know this is what you want and what is needed.....

It's against IDEA to use a negative behavior program like continual removal from class.

 

[BusynMember]

Banging the head is VERY common with spectrum behavior. I'd trust the private guy way over the school. He has so many spectrum traits. At any rate, I'm guessing that he can't help it and will bang his head even if you make him wear a helmet. If he is socially clueless, he will not think about embarassment. If he thought about it, he wouldn't bang his head in front of his peers in the first place. He is not in sync with social norms, whatever his real problems turn out to be. He would benefit greatly in a social skills class.

Good luck!

 

[buddy]

Oh, Q bangs his head, sometimes on surfaces, sometimes with his hands, but he would die if I suggested a helmet . on the other hand, if he chose to wear the helmet, it wouldn't come off!

Sometimes it is frustration...for a long time out was headaches and seizures.....