JKF
Well-Known Member
difficult child #1 went into his new program at the end of May. He had a rather peaceful honeymoon period but he's beginning to show his true colors now. This program is pretty strict and I really like the staff there so far. They call him out on his BS and don't let him manipulate them.
difficult child has called me twice in the last week. It always starts with tears and "I hate this place, I want to come home", etc. The first time it ended with him calling me an "F'ing B" and last night it ended with him telling me I don't love him, I only care about myself and my husband and I as far as he's concerned I can go "F" myself. Lovely huh? I hung up because I refuse to allow him to talk to me like that.
He called back almost immediately after I hung up. At that point I'd had it. I told him that HIS actions are preventing him from coming home and that HE's responsible for his actions. I told him that although he may be hurt by decisions we've made, we're also hurt by decisions he's made. For example, just a few weeks ago for his HS graduation my husband and I scraped together $400 to buy him a new laptop. We were so excited to give it to him and it meant a lot to us that we were able to get it for him. I worked extra hours and my husband worked an extra side job or two so we could buy it for him. Well, he liked it for a week, then proceeded to try to reprogram it. After that he hated it and then I just found out he sold it for $50 so he could buy junk food! I want to cry! Seriously!
So basically now all he has is $50 (the staff took it to hold so that he can't buy junk with it), no laptop, nothing. I learned a lesson though. I will NEVER do anything like that for him again. He simply doesn't care about anyone or anything but himself and what HE wants! I'm hurt and sad but maybe that was his intention in the first place??
Anyway, I called the staff earlier to find out what's happening there. They said he's fine until he doesn't get his own way. That's when he starts freaking out and screaming and cursing and breaking things. Yeah, what else is new? Same as he did at home. And here he is telling me last night that he's changed and that I won't give him a chance. How can I give him a chance if he's still doing the same things there that he did at home? Does he really believe that WHERE he is matters? No what matters is what HE wants and what HE can get out of people. Once he doesn't get his own way he wants outta wherever he is FAST.
I'm so stressed! I'm starting to think this will never end. I had hopes that once he was 18 it would be easier. Silly me huh???
difficult child has called me twice in the last week. It always starts with tears and "I hate this place, I want to come home", etc. The first time it ended with him calling me an "F'ing B" and last night it ended with him telling me I don't love him, I only care about myself and my husband and I as far as he's concerned I can go "F" myself. Lovely huh? I hung up because I refuse to allow him to talk to me like that.
He called back almost immediately after I hung up. At that point I'd had it. I told him that HIS actions are preventing him from coming home and that HE's responsible for his actions. I told him that although he may be hurt by decisions we've made, we're also hurt by decisions he's made. For example, just a few weeks ago for his HS graduation my husband and I scraped together $400 to buy him a new laptop. We were so excited to give it to him and it meant a lot to us that we were able to get it for him. I worked extra hours and my husband worked an extra side job or two so we could buy it for him. Well, he liked it for a week, then proceeded to try to reprogram it. After that he hated it and then I just found out he sold it for $50 so he could buy junk food! I want to cry! Seriously!
So basically now all he has is $50 (the staff took it to hold so that he can't buy junk with it), no laptop, nothing. I learned a lesson though. I will NEVER do anything like that for him again. He simply doesn't care about anyone or anything but himself and what HE wants! I'm hurt and sad but maybe that was his intention in the first place??
Anyway, I called the staff earlier to find out what's happening there. They said he's fine until he doesn't get his own way. That's when he starts freaking out and screaming and cursing and breaking things. Yeah, what else is new? Same as he did at home. And here he is telling me last night that he's changed and that I won't give him a chance. How can I give him a chance if he's still doing the same things there that he did at home? Does he really believe that WHERE he is matters? No what matters is what HE wants and what HE can get out of people. Once he doesn't get his own way he wants outta wherever he is FAST.
I'm so stressed! I'm starting to think this will never end. I had hopes that once he was 18 it would be easier. Silly me huh???
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