Buddy, I am sorry yesterday was so hard, but it was NOT such a bad thing as it might seem.
This may sound strange, so bear with me, okay?
Have you ever wondered what WE seem like to Q? On some level he KNOWS that he has outbursts/meltdowns and isn't the same as most other people in any group he can see. He KNOWS he has hard days, but likely he does NOT think that you/adults do.
Yesterday he saw you having a hard day. NOT FUN for all involved, but IMPORTANT because times like this give him the info that other people struggle too. He may not be able to process this on a cognitive, talk it out level, but deep down it is there, and it is GOOD.
Can you imagine how awful it would feel to be the ONLY ONE who had bad days? Sure seems awful to me. So while you didn't handle things the best, and needed a break and triggered some stuff, you also showed your son that you are only human and make mistakes and that it is okay to make them because he still loves you and you still love him.
I remember when this was pointed out to me, I was upset because I didn't feel good and couldn't cope and triggered all the kids and myself and one in real life friend took my kids for a break and it ends up to be a memory I cherish. NOT because it was "fun" or even really 'good' , just because it was, and because I learned that sometimes it is more important to show the kids we are human than to have a good day.
Just a thought.
This may sound strange, so bear with me, okay?
Have you ever wondered what WE seem like to Q? On some level he KNOWS that he has outbursts/meltdowns and isn't the same as most other people in any group he can see. He KNOWS he has hard days, but likely he does NOT think that you/adults do.
Yesterday he saw you having a hard day. NOT FUN for all involved, but IMPORTANT because times like this give him the info that other people struggle too. He may not be able to process this on a cognitive, talk it out level, but deep down it is there, and it is GOOD.
Can you imagine how awful it would feel to be the ONLY ONE who had bad days? Sure seems awful to me. So while you didn't handle things the best, and needed a break and triggered some stuff, you also showed your son that you are only human and make mistakes and that it is okay to make them because he still loves you and you still love him.
I remember when this was pointed out to me, I was upset because I didn't feel good and couldn't cope and triggered all the kids and myself and one in real life friend took my kids for a break and it ends up to be a memory I cherish. NOT because it was "fun" or even really 'good' , just because it was, and because I learned that sometimes it is more important to show the kids we are human than to have a good day.
Just a thought.
T
TeDo
Guest
Darn Like button isn't working again!! <(LIKE)> <(LIKE)> <(LIKE)> Susiestar's post. I might have to print this one out and keep it on a wall so I can refer to it when I am having a day like that. Thanks Susiestar!!!
buddy
New Member
That is a really good point Susie! thanks. And you reminded me that Q is pretty insightful at times.... he has asked me sometimes if I got enough sleep or if I needed a nap???!!!!
He woke this morning so excited to go to the MOA... for anyone who does not live in our egocentric world, lmao, MOA is the largest mall in the USA (another mall has more retail space, but this is the largest because it has an indoor amusement park and a large indoor aquarium and several other things, a theater, clubs, restaurants, bowling alleys, mini golf, a nascar experience place (he is too young) etc.....
So I will buy him an arm band for his birthday to ride as many rides as he wants. They offer a pca band for one person per disabled child! (you can switch it between people). He has really been asking me about every single ride... asking which ones I willl ride with him...(truth is he doens't want me to, only wants me to say NO, I wont ride that it is too scary for me but you are brave enough for that... lol). I told him that since he is almost as big as I am now, (height wise that is) he has to be the strong man and protect ME and he thought that was really funny. He said he is going to walk like a girl thru the mall... then stood up and started wiggling his shoulders and hips and I have no idea why that even popped into his head but his "perseverative speech" is in high gear today and I am in a much better place so just laughed it all off.
Well, he is 'sited to go so I am gonna go make myself beautiful (ok we want to go today so I will just make myself presentable).
He woke this morning so excited to go to the MOA... for anyone who does not live in our egocentric world, lmao, MOA is the largest mall in the USA (another mall has more retail space, but this is the largest because it has an indoor amusement park and a large indoor aquarium and several other things, a theater, clubs, restaurants, bowling alleys, mini golf, a nascar experience place (he is too young) etc.....
So I will buy him an arm band for his birthday to ride as many rides as he wants. They offer a pca band for one person per disabled child! (you can switch it between people). He has really been asking me about every single ride... asking which ones I willl ride with him...(truth is he doens't want me to, only wants me to say NO, I wont ride that it is too scary for me but you are brave enough for that... lol). I told him that since he is almost as big as I am now, (height wise that is) he has to be the strong man and protect ME and he thought that was really funny. He said he is going to walk like a girl thru the mall... then stood up and started wiggling his shoulders and hips and I have no idea why that even popped into his head but his "perseverative speech" is in high gear today and I am in a much better place so just laughed it all off.
Well, he is 'sited to go so I am gonna go make myself beautiful (ok we want to go today so I will just make myself presentable).
T
TeDo
Guest
Glad a good night's sleep helped. Get going girl!! Don't keep the kid waiting!! Jeez, he's been waiting AAAALLLLLLLLLLL night. LOL Have fun!
