I talked to K about easy child's involvement with friends who are not helping her to live her own life. K has been working on trying to get easy child to see how her involvement in her friend's life is not healthy for her.
easy child picked up a girl at difficult child's school. She came in and asked me if I would watch baby L while she took puppy to dog obedience. No problem. Then she said she needed to cancel her plans with K tonight because she had to babysit for baby L. I said, "No, you do not have to babysit. Your plans come first." "But if I don't J will have to stay home and loose his job and then who will watch baby L?" I told her J needs to get a job during the day so he can find day care while at work. I told her that her life is too important to take on the responsibility of caring for a baby for friends who are not looking at her needs. J and any other friend has got to stop using easy child to solve their problems. easy child needs to find a job and an apt far away from these people and start a new life with new friends who will support her dreams and not just call on her when they need something.
easy child came home at 6:30 without baby L. I said, "You are not babysitting baby L then?" "No" "Why?" "I can't watch her during dog training because you are an idiot."
I have learned that many times she behaves like this is because she is following my wishes and doing so because she feels I am correct though she will never admit it.
Of course, she will never know that secretly I am rejoicing when at times like this she calls me a name because for no matter what reason, it is not acceptable. So, easy child gets another month added to, "Don't ask anything of me until you can be nice for me for one month!" and I think I get to claim this as a victory!
easy child picked up a girl at difficult child's school. She came in and asked me if I would watch baby L while she took puppy to dog obedience. No problem. Then she said she needed to cancel her plans with K tonight because she had to babysit for baby L. I said, "No, you do not have to babysit. Your plans come first." "But if I don't J will have to stay home and loose his job and then who will watch baby L?" I told her J needs to get a job during the day so he can find day care while at work. I told her that her life is too important to take on the responsibility of caring for a baby for friends who are not looking at her needs. J and any other friend has got to stop using easy child to solve their problems. easy child needs to find a job and an apt far away from these people and start a new life with new friends who will support her dreams and not just call on her when they need something.
easy child came home at 6:30 without baby L. I said, "You are not babysitting baby L then?" "No" "Why?" "I can't watch her during dog training because you are an idiot."
I have learned that many times she behaves like this is because she is following my wishes and doing so because she feels I am correct though she will never admit it.
Of course, she will never know that secretly I am rejoicing when at times like this she calls me a name because for no matter what reason, it is not acceptable. So, easy child gets another month added to, "Don't ask anything of me until you can be nice for me for one month!" and I think I get to claim this as a victory!
good job Mom
