Commitment
- Thread starter klmno
- Start date
klmno
Active Member
Ok, I'll try to clarify some things. I went back down there to pick up the court order and ran into the defense attny. He said the PO could have gotten difficult child into the local program but fought against it and that she would not budge when the GAL tried to get her to. He said it might be for the best- that difficult child had told him he's on the verge of doing something drastic- he made it sound mmore like homocide than suicide but wouldn't elaborate. He said he had a friend in the state system and was going to call him to try to get more info.
A mental health person talked to difficult child and they are not tdo'ing him. While I was at clerk's office, I asked for a copy of memo sent by PO. The clerk went to judge and asked if I could have a copy and the judge said no.
Intake is a local detention thing- when committed to state Department of Juvenile Justice (which is prison for juveniles), they are sent to a nearby area for processing and since difficult child was committed for an "undetermined amount of time", the statee will use their sentencing guidelinges. This is determined by type of offense and previous offenses and whether any are felonies. The judge did not commit him just for this offense, she committed him for 3 or 4 from last year, too- 2 of which are felonies. I think that the kids have to do their time in the prison system and the alternative placements are step-down/transitional places between release and being back in the community. The Residential Treatment Center (RTC)'s are not psychiatric Residential Treatment Center (RTC)'s, that's for sure.
One source said the parole officer would be involved thru this and the parole officer would not be the PO, but would be thru our same intake office (court services unit) as the PO- so they would know each other. Another says that the probation officer is the one to do this transfer paperwork to state and PO stays involved throughout difficult child's time in state Department of Juvenile Justice.
I think maybe the gal went with defense attny this morning to talk to difficult child before court. She said she had spoken with him and that he did not want to go live with my bro. If she heard whatever the defense attny did, the GAL might have been afraid that difficult child was homocidal and maybe that's why she changed gears. This will become clearer when I have my court for show cause. I assume it will be the same judge, but who knows. Interestly enouogh, I checked on that too to asked the clerk when my arraignment would be. She said they still haven't processed it- they are only on Feb 2 filings right now. So, that could take months. difficult child will be well in the system by then.
Thanks for all the support!! It means so much to me.
And yes, I am moving- especially if PO is going to be involved in our lives and difficult child even isn't home. I have wondered if the GAL found this board and saw that I was talking about moving too and that had something to do with it. Anyway, I figure I have every right to move if I can find full time employment somewhere else- since I lost that here trying to meet all the previous court orders.
You know- when I'm testifying about why I refused to taake that personality test, I hope someone there gets it when I tell them that ONE of the reasons is because I could not see sending difficult child home right now with court orders for me to get treatment as an acceptable solution.
A mental health person talked to difficult child and they are not tdo'ing him. While I was at clerk's office, I asked for a copy of memo sent by PO. The clerk went to judge and asked if I could have a copy and the judge said no.
Intake is a local detention thing- when committed to state Department of Juvenile Justice (which is prison for juveniles), they are sent to a nearby area for processing and since difficult child was committed for an "undetermined amount of time", the statee will use their sentencing guidelinges. This is determined by type of offense and previous offenses and whether any are felonies. The judge did not commit him just for this offense, she committed him for 3 or 4 from last year, too- 2 of which are felonies. I think that the kids have to do their time in the prison system and the alternative placements are step-down/transitional places between release and being back in the community. The Residential Treatment Center (RTC)'s are not psychiatric Residential Treatment Center (RTC)'s, that's for sure.
One source said the parole officer would be involved thru this and the parole officer would not be the PO, but would be thru our same intake office (court services unit) as the PO- so they would know each other. Another says that the probation officer is the one to do this transfer paperwork to state and PO stays involved throughout difficult child's time in state Department of Juvenile Justice.
I think maybe the gal went with defense attny this morning to talk to difficult child before court. She said she had spoken with him and that he did not want to go live with my bro. If she heard whatever the defense attny did, the GAL might have been afraid that difficult child was homocidal and maybe that's why she changed gears. This will become clearer when I have my court for show cause. I assume it will be the same judge, but who knows. Interestly enouogh, I checked on that too to asked the clerk when my arraignment would be. She said they still haven't processed it- they are only on Feb 2 filings right now. So, that could take months. difficult child will be well in the system by then.
Thanks for all the support!! It means so much to me.
And yes, I am moving- especially if PO is going to be involved in our lives and difficult child even isn't home. I have wondered if the GAL found this board and saw that I was talking about moving too and that had something to do with it. Anyway, I figure I have every right to move if I can find full time employment somewhere else- since I lost that here trying to meet all the previous court orders.
You know- when I'm testifying about why I refused to taake that personality test, I hope someone there gets it when I tell them that ONE of the reasons is because I could not see sending difficult child home right now with court orders for me to get treatment as an acceptable solution.
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klmno
Active Member
Is there any feasible way to have someone look into what that PO put in her memo? The defense attny says it has nothing to do with him because he's difficult child's attny. But I think it has everything to do with difficult child. If they committed him to the state because they don't trust me and they don't trust me because PO lied, I want someone to look inito it. I'm thinking about those questions the CA asked me- she was reading from a letter (I assume the PO's memo) while questioning me. If the PO wrote in there that she didn't know about difficult child's psychiatric hospital stays, etc, and that effected the outcome, isn't there someone who can do anything? Why do you think the GAL didn't do anything? Should I consider a complaint against the gal for going to court saying things like I might pull difficult child out of Residential Treatment Center (RTC), when there's no reason to believe that and there's proof that I'm the one that was trying so hard to get it? And like saying that I wouldn't address my own issues when there is evidence to the contrary? Or should I consider having the defense attny appeal it due to the fact that all of this could have been prevented if appropriate action had been taken sooner when I put the request in to the judge in Jan?
What would you ladies do?
What would you ladies do?
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klmno
Active Member
What ffreaking issues are there that these people think I have that caused difficult child this problem? Why won't they say specificly and what is it they they think I should have done differently? I remember telling PO in Sept or Oct that I was so stressed that I thought I'd be seekiing a therapist for myself as soon as I got difficult child switched to a new one. She acted like she didn't care to hear about "my issues". I just cannot see how or why gal thought trashing me to the judge was in difficult child's best interest. What am I missing here? The GAL knew -- I told her Friday that I was seeing a therapist. She never brought that up at all.
See, if she really believed that, why wouldn't she have advocated for difficult child to go to dss?
See, if she really believed that, why wouldn't she have advocated for difficult child to go to dss?
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DammitJanet
Well-Known Member
K...I know this is hard. It is the absolutely worst, hardest, gut-wrenching thing a parent has to go through. It is even harder when you have to do it all alone. I cant imagine having to go through watching my baby being taken away in cuffs and shackles if I hadnt had his dad to lean on. I remember those days only too well. I remember wanting to run away to Canada and hide.
Right now, there is nothing more you can do. You can rail at the injustice of it all for a time but you have to get on with life. You cant let difficult child see you all upset. Concentrate on letting him see a good front. He is where he is, he will get through it, you know he can do it.
For whatever reason this happened, it happened. Sometimes life throws us curve balls that we dont know are going to end up being something that really end up being good in the end. Maybe that will happen here...maybe it wont. But it appears for the foreseeable future difficult child is going to be in the custody of Department of Juvenile Justice, so we have to hope that they can see his problems. There are mechanisms in place for him to get the help he needs and that may just well happen when everyone stops focusing on you and starts focusing on him.
Right now, there is nothing more you can do. You can rail at the injustice of it all for a time but you have to get on with life. You cant let difficult child see you all upset. Concentrate on letting him see a good front. He is where he is, he will get through it, you know he can do it.
For whatever reason this happened, it happened. Sometimes life throws us curve balls that we dont know are going to end up being something that really end up being good in the end. Maybe that will happen here...maybe it wont. But it appears for the foreseeable future difficult child is going to be in the custody of Department of Juvenile Justice, so we have to hope that they can see his problems. There are mechanisms in place for him to get the help he needs and that may just well happen when everyone stops focusing on you and starts focusing on him.
klmno
Active Member
Thanks, Janet. I've just learned not to trust these people. I know it probably looks paranoid to a lot of people, but I KNOW that this GAL misrepresented things and said different things to me on Friday. Even if that's justified in her job, how can it leave me trusting the system? The psychiatrist at the psychiatric hospital had told the gal that this would be a detriment to difficult child and she went to court and said it was the only alternative because I couldn't be counted on to leave difficult child in Residential Treatment Center (RTC). WTH is she basing that on? Who has been the one to advocate and scrounge for funds to cover Residential Treatment Center (RTC)? She was also in the hallway going off about the psychiatric hospital discharging difficult child on Friday- she knew they didn't have any choice because she never arranged anything differently- she knew his court was today and the psychiatric hospital had no control over when people from here went to pick difficult child up- only she could make them come this morning before court.
The state Department of Juvenile Justice claims to hire out psychiatrist care to get rx's and claims that each detention place has therapist care. Well, their treatment is behavior mod for whatever the criminal act was. Whoopee. It isn't really mental health care. I don't know why the judge bothered writing that down. I bet whatever little I have left that this is what difficult child gets. I think their Residential Treatment Center (RTC) alternative placement is for real criminal insane or sex offenders. Our governor is closing the only adolescent state psychiatric hospital- I doubt he's going to allow any real mental health treatment in state juvy.
The only thing worse would have been placement with my bro and that's cause then I'd feel worse knowing it happened by a family member. I can't begin to tell you how this hoovers. difficult child told me in Jan he needed more help. I tried with all my mioght to get it and they know it. Why doesn't that count for anything? It was the judge and PO who sat on it. They act like it was just me trying to get what I want- carp- I didn't WANT any of this. I was trying to do what the mental health profs were recommending. The legal people apparently don't care about that. But, we all know what would have happened if the psychiatrist/therapist had recommended something and I didn't jump to do it.
Sorry- I'm not mad at you. I just know better than to get my hopes built up. difficult child is going to juvenile prison and it appears that it will be for at least a year. Then, who knows. I doubt he'll ever live at home again and if he does, I won't even know him anymore. His life is ruined.
Now- why would they really care what areas my personality deviates from the norm? Does it matter anymore or are they still going to have me court ordered to fix whatever they think my issues are? Can they even do that if the juvenile has been turned over to the state?
If an appeal is going to be put in, it has to be put in by next week but defense attny said that he really needed to get it in within a couple of days.
The state Department of Juvenile Justice claims to hire out psychiatrist care to get rx's and claims that each detention place has therapist care. Well, their treatment is behavior mod for whatever the criminal act was. Whoopee. It isn't really mental health care. I don't know why the judge bothered writing that down. I bet whatever little I have left that this is what difficult child gets. I think their Residential Treatment Center (RTC) alternative placement is for real criminal insane or sex offenders. Our governor is closing the only adolescent state psychiatric hospital- I doubt he's going to allow any real mental health treatment in state juvy.
The only thing worse would have been placement with my bro and that's cause then I'd feel worse knowing it happened by a family member. I can't begin to tell you how this hoovers. difficult child told me in Jan he needed more help. I tried with all my mioght to get it and they know it. Why doesn't that count for anything? It was the judge and PO who sat on it. They act like it was just me trying to get what I want- carp- I didn't WANT any of this. I was trying to do what the mental health profs were recommending. The legal people apparently don't care about that. But, we all know what would have happened if the psychiatrist/therapist had recommended something and I didn't jump to do it.
Sorry- I'm not mad at you. I just know better than to get my hopes built up. difficult child is going to juvenile prison and it appears that it will be for at least a year. Then, who knows. I doubt he'll ever live at home again and if he does, I won't even know him anymore. His life is ruined.
Now- why would they really care what areas my personality deviates from the norm? Does it matter anymore or are they still going to have me court ordered to fix whatever they think my issues are? Can they even do that if the juvenile has been turned over to the state?
If an appeal is going to be put in, it has to be put in by next week but defense attny said that he really needed to get it in within a couple of days.
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klmno, there is still a chance of him going to Residential Treatment Center (RTC), once they process him through the intake I sent you the link for. That is the entire purpose of that place, to decide placement. It's my understanding that all juveniles go through that place when they're sentenced. Try hard to take this one step at a time.. and not think too far ahead. Step back and let things happen now, as much as you can. It's out of your hands.
I have to agree that second-guessing the past and why things happened, and who did what and why, is only going to make you feel worse at this point.. you can't change what happened, you can only deal with what comes next. Take a deep breath, put the court proceedings behind you, and move do your best to move forward. It's not a matter of trusting them now, they have made their decision, and difficult child will move through the system.
Please, please begin to concentrate more on yourself if you can. The best thing you can do for difficult child now is to take care of YOU.
I have to agree that second-guessing the past and why things happened, and who did what and why, is only going to make you feel worse at this point.. you can't change what happened, you can only deal with what comes next. Take a deep breath, put the court proceedings behind you, and move do your best to move forward. It's not a matter of trusting them now, they have made their decision, and difficult child will move through the system.
Please, please begin to concentrate more on yourself if you can. The best thing you can do for difficult child now is to take care of YOU.
klmno
Active Member
Thank you! I'm just having a hard time dealing with it all right now. It seems to me there should be some recourse- a way for a paraent to answer to accusations- when a GAL gets up in court and tells the judge things that you know aren't true- like me not doing anything to address my issues.
It will take me a while to get past all these thoughts and memories of court. Another one- how is it that I'm the one who has an attitude of my way or hit the road, when it was the PO who who sent difficult child straight to state juvy instead of dealing with things before they got to this point and doing domething in a "shade of gray".
It will take me a while to get past all these thoughts and memories of court. Another one- how is it that I'm the one who has an attitude of my way or hit the road, when it was the PO who who sent difficult child straight to state juvy instead of dealing with things before they got to this point and doing domething in a "shade of gray".
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I'm so sorry it went this way. I went through a very similar situation with B. They would not give him mental health treatment in juvie, but I got an IEP going to have him admitted to an Residential Treatment Center (RTC) through the school district. I did have to get the Judge's permission, but that gives you people on your side to arrange it. I hope this works out some way to his benefit.
Allan-Matlem
Active Member
Hi,
Sending prayers and positive thoughts in your direction.
As Lori says we need people on our side , people who can vouch for you.
For sure participation here , taking advice from those who have been there done that and offereing support says a lot about you, one needs a social worker or therapist as ' protection' when we deal with the courts.
maybe you can get some documentation from professionals recommending treatment that will serve his needs
Allan
Sending prayers and positive thoughts in your direction.
As Lori says we need people on our side , people who can vouch for you.
For sure participation here , taking advice from those who have been there done that and offereing support says a lot about you, one needs a social worker or therapist as ' protection' when we deal with the courts.
maybe you can get some documentation from professionals recommending treatment that will serve his needs
Allan
mog
Member
I am so sorry for you, I know exactly what you are going threw. My difficult child was commited for ten days while we wait for trial then for a (20 day) trial period where they were supposed to then send him home if they did not find a facility in our town for him, on the 19th day I got a call that they found a bed for him and moved him 5 hours away. He has been gone now since OCT. --I had just bought his halloween costume that he didn't get to wear--Thanksgiving which by the way was his 16th birthday- Christmas-New Years (we always have a party -not this year)--Valentines day --and I talked to his JPO WHO SAID THEY WOULD LET HIM COME HOME WITH MST -then talked to his therapist down there who said that she is recommending moving him to a different facility which is even farther away. as it is now we have only seen him four times since he left. I too am going to have to find a "good" attorney to try to get him home. I know that it is hard and really don't have any good advise but it does seem that it is always the parents fault and usually the ones that don't have children much less difficult child to give the judgement. I hope things get better! Unfortunately you are not alone.
klmno
Active Member
Thank you! I really appreciate the support. I wish the attny's- who will go to court and admit that they know nothing about mental health issues- understood that "mental health treatment" given in state correctional faacilities is not exactly the mental health treatment that is needed for a lot of these kids. I am very sorry to hear that you are going thru this, too. Just a wood of warning- if they are convinced that you/the family is the cause of the problem, don't expect a great love for mst.
DammitJanet
Well-Known Member
Here is the treatment model for MST. I think it is rather good and it does not blame the parents, it in fact empowers the caregivers to be the captain of the ship.
http://www.mstservices.com/
http://www.mstservices.com/
