my 33 year old difficult child has been in crisis mode for over a year. He's also been homeless for a year now with periods of time when myself or my ex has helped him with by the week motel rentals, etc. I finally said enough and have refused any more financial help because it wasn't helping and was draining us financially. So yesterday he rang my doorbell before 7:30 am wanting to get some clothing and blankets I had stored for him. The day before he had met another homeless person who said he could stay with him in his van if difficult child could find a place for him to park. difficult child tricked his brother into letting him park at his place ( by lying and saying he bought a van to sleep in but didn't have anywhere to park to sleep) omitting the fact that he was exposing his brother and his family to a stranger who no one really knew. Anyway after difficult child showed up Sat morning to get his stuff, he told my husband and I that he was going with the other guy to find work in the next state over. We cautioned him that this man was a stranger and it might not be the safest plan but at 33 he was a man and could make his own decisions. However my husband was smart enough to at least write down the make, model and license plate of the van. After he gathered up all of his belongings he said he would contact us soon to let us know where they ended up. Not even an hour later he called screaming at me that the other homeless man had driven off with all of his belongings including his medications, phone and wallet. He waited while GFG33 had stepped out of the van for a minute then drove off. The police were called and ended up calling me to ask about the belongings difficult child had picked up from my garage. At that time the officer told me that he suspected difficult child of using drugs as he spent over an hour with him taking his report and driving him to the scene, etc. and difficult child exhibited drug like behavior. I told him difficult child was bipolar with anxiety but that I also suspected him of using illegal drugs. The rest of the day was total drama and went down hill very quickly. He blamed everyone but himself. Cried, screamed and begged for us to get him a phone, backpack clothes, drive him around to find the guy so he could get his stuff back, etc. I refused but told him that he had missed a tote of clothes and he still had some clothes he could pick up. I also told him he'd be better off procuring a place to stay and food to eat instead of trying to find his stuff. finally about 6:30 pm he called again and asked me to pick him up at Walmart. I agreed and told him he could come and eat supper and get what clothes he had left. When I picked him up he started in on how I was worthless not to buy him a phone, clothes etc. so on the drive to my house which is only a mile or so from home I'd had enough and told him he wasn't coming in my home. I would bring his clothes out to him and drop him off somewhere else, away from my home. My husband seeing how agitated he was came with me to help keep the peace and watch out for my safety. He asked to be dropped off at a fleabag motel but when we got there he said he couldn't rent a room without his id which had been stolen. I told him I wouldn't use my id but I'd come in and explain the situation with him. As soon as we walked in the desk clerk said he wouldn't rent to him because he had been too much trouble there before. difficult child asked to use my phone to call another motel and got the same result, they wouldn't rent him a room. I then told him he needed to get out it was 8:30 and I had a 12 year old at home that needed us with him. difficult child started the verbal abuse and threatening to call my work ( I work in a school) and tell them I had mental issues and was abusive. He also threatened to call the hospital and police and tell them the same. We had driven to his friends house at this point so my husband and I had enough abuse and we stopped and told him to get out and put his belongings on the sidewalk and drove away. So tonight about 7:00 pm I get a phone call and it was him saying he needed driven to the hospital because the boyfriend of the person he stayed with last night had beat him up and destroyed his belongings and thrown him out on the street. I asked him where he was calling from and why he didn't call the police and or an ambulance. He said he had walked to subway and he didn't want any more trouble as the. Oh friend and 3 of his buddies had jumped him. Now here is the part that I'm not sure if I did the right thing but I knew after last night I didn't have it in me to deal with him again. I told him if we was really injured and in need of treatment to call the police and emergency EMTs and I hung up. I am now suffering huge pangs go guilt and what ifs. What if he is truly severely injured, where can he go, what if he dies on the street because I didn't help when I could have. I just need some peace, but now I'm in for a long night of thinking the worst.
Sent using ConductDisorders
Sent using ConductDisorders