SWOT
As you know I am co executor with my crazy brother for my mother’s estate. It is all liquid and nothing to be done but process the will through probate, pass the accounts and complete terminal taxes.
My brother kept throwing wrenches in the works until he had such conflict that the estate law firm had to resign.
He now has his own lawyer as do I. I requested he resign or I resign and one of us deal with the Will (it’s not Rocket Science). He declined and proposed that he and his law firm mange be estate and that he be in “Charge”. I obliged his wishes with the caevate that I would retain my law firm and review the processes and ensure all was managed properly. He was charged over $7500 for this process to date and I was charged $2100. All a waste of money for sure. He got very salty when I sent my expenses to date to him and his law firm. He tried to get me to agree in writing that I approved of his legal costs as did my law firm. He declared his was more expensive than mine because of all the research required. I refused to agree to any of these claims. I sent the communication to my law firm and their response was they had no clue what he was referring to or talking about. I told him he was accountable to the beneficiaries and they have to approve the passing of accounts. They may have concerns over the difference in legal fees.
Clearly my brother is an idiot who fails to realize law firms work on billable hours and wasting their time costs you money.
I suggested his law firm may be cost prohibitive and suggested mine may be a better option to use. He declined. I have this in writing, so I can protect myself from any concerns raised by the beneficiaries.
He then sent me a laundry list of things he wanted me to do regarding the taxes and the revenue agency and bank. I really think he felt by being in charge he could boss me around (idiot). I explained to him that the agreement he requested and was agreed to and put in place prevented me from taking any action on anything, I was place in a role to review processes once completed. I am sure this didn’t make him a happy camper. I coped his law firm and they concurred with me. Please insert eye roll.
Yesterday he sent me an e mail indicating I had documents to review and sign. I could review with his law firm (a long drive away....not happening) or have them sent by courrier to my law firm. I told them to send them to my law firm c/o laser who had handled the litigation. I had discussed using their firms estate department but a lawyer was yet to be assigned to the file. My brother full well knew that my estate litigateor had agreed to stay on and act in the interim until the file was transferred. This did not prevent my brother from totally losing his
. At this point he is only allowed to communicate to me in writing (mail or e mail) as per the agreement. He sent a pile of crap e mail accusing me of breaching the agreement and not using my lawyer of record for the estate (yup boys a nut job).
I copied response to his law firm and to my estate litigator. And my brother went at it again with all sorts of e mails and crazy accusation.
I finally sent a message identifying my now appointed estate lawyer and my estate litigator and any designates from their firm as lawyers of record. I also indicated that due to his continued harrasing nature he was to communicate with me through his lawyer/designate from the firm only. I made sure he knew this meant don’t have any form of direct communication with me at all.
All this hassle all this additional money spent. And yet it was easier than attempting to have him removed as co executor. My siblings all begged me not to resign as none of them speak to or trust my brother. I am sure he was trying to force a breach of agreement so he could attempt to get the estate managed by a trust or third party (he is inherently lazy and not very bright). The estate being managed by an outside party wound be a waste of money. It is simple and straight forward.
All I can say is I have 2 comments for you all
Do not chose two relatives or children to be co executors of your will, it never turns out well. And better yet chose an unrelated executor.
Second SWOT I feel your pain. Trust me when I say, my brother can do nothing more than proceed with executing the will, of course only after putting us all through 7 months of unnecessary hell. He has spent senseless time and money for no reason. Still it is cheaper than attempting to remove him as executor which he indicated he would fight. So very sad to desecrate my mother’s last wishes like this.
On a final note I have instructed my siblings/beneficiaries to indicate that all legal expenses are to be taken off the payment allotment that will be provided to us for executing the Will. It is their legal right to request this. It will drive him bonkers!! Too darn bad!