DammitJanet
Well-Known Member
Nancy, Im with you on this Facebook and car stuff. That just gave me a bad feeling. Shouldnt she be more worried about using that money for her treatment? Oh yeah...difficult child.
Sigh.
Sigh.
Either back into intensive outpatient or sober home for two years
- Thread starter Nancy
- Start date
barneysmom
Member
Nancy,
I think DDD made a good point about youth needing long-term NON-parental supervision for a lasting recovery. I don't think you can possibly be the one to monitor whether she stays sober and follows the program.
When gfg17 became psychotic I called our state representative (among many, many others in the mental health hierarchy) and asked for help. Not even sure what kind of help I was asking for. Just told them the whole story -- that our son was slipping through the cracks. They intervened for us big-time to make sure our CMH was helping us.
Ggf became eligible for Medicaid when he was out of our house for 30 days (he was in psychiatric hospital 70 days and then to Residential Treatment Center (RTC) for 7 weeks).
I don't think your daughter can change right now. I think she sounds like she's in the grip. Plus developmentally she is not nineteen. More like 12.
Can you get a mental health advocate?
I don't think you're a failure at detachment -- it's just that the right treatment isn't available, the money's tight and your little girl is slipping away. What do you think is the ideal treatment for her regardless of the cost? (NOT at home).
Also does she have any underlying psychiatric issues? Often people can't start a solid recovery until those are addressed. Maybe a psychiatric hospital stay? She is a danger to herself because of her extreme impulsivity (danger to self being one of the "criteria" for psychiatric hospital as I'm sure you know).
Just brainstorming.
Jo
I think DDD made a good point about youth needing long-term NON-parental supervision for a lasting recovery. I don't think you can possibly be the one to monitor whether she stays sober and follows the program.
When gfg17 became psychotic I called our state representative (among many, many others in the mental health hierarchy) and asked for help. Not even sure what kind of help I was asking for. Just told them the whole story -- that our son was slipping through the cracks. They intervened for us big-time to make sure our CMH was helping us.
Ggf became eligible for Medicaid when he was out of our house for 30 days (he was in psychiatric hospital 70 days and then to Residential Treatment Center (RTC) for 7 weeks).
I don't think your daughter can change right now. I think she sounds like she's in the grip. Plus developmentally she is not nineteen. More like 12.
Can you get a mental health advocate?
I don't think you're a failure at detachment -- it's just that the right treatment isn't available, the money's tight and your little girl is slipping away. What do you think is the ideal treatment for her regardless of the cost? (NOT at home).
Also does she have any underlying psychiatric issues? Often people can't start a solid recovery until those are addressed. Maybe a psychiatric hospital stay? She is a danger to herself because of her extreme impulsivity (danger to self being one of the "criteria" for psychiatric hospital as I'm sure you know).
Just brainstorming.
Jo
barneysmom
Member
Protection and Advocacy -- federally mandated for persons with disabilities --
katya02
Solace
I'm sorry to be so late coming to this, Nancy - many hugs to you and your family. Of course you are still worried, that's normal. But you aren't trying to 'save' your daughter by intervening
and doing things for her; you've laid out her options for her and she has chosen what seems most appropriate right now. The warning signs on Facebook are worrying, and a confrontation
won't clear them up. But they give you a heads-up, at least.
I hope you can relax somewhat today and enjoy the holiday. You may want to make your participation in family days contingent on your daughter's dedication to the program. Or, if you just can't face
it again, maybe one meeting with the family therapist should address that and give you the chance to say that it's more than you can do right now. Your daughter might need to hear that.
Best wishes and lots of warm thoughts.
and doing things for her; you've laid out her options for her and she has chosen what seems most appropriate right now. The warning signs on Facebook are worrying, and a confrontation
won't clear them up. But they give you a heads-up, at least.
I hope you can relax somewhat today and enjoy the holiday. You may want to make your participation in family days contingent on your daughter's dedication to the program. Or, if you just can't face
it again, maybe one meeting with the family therapist should address that and give you the chance to say that it's more than you can do right now. Your daughter might need to hear that.
Best wishes and lots of warm thoughts.
