I finally got up off my lazy butt and went to see a lawyer about a new will. I probably could have done it myself, since neither my husband nor I own any real estate or business interests, but I wanted to make sure every I was dotted and every T crossed.
If I go before my husband he's my sole beneficiary, so no problem there. But if I outlive my husband then my son is my sole beneficiary. There won't be much left, but my IRA and stocks that I own could be as much as $10k. Again, not much, but given the horrible choices my son continues to make, giving him that much money would make as much sense as giving a pyromaniac a gallon of gasoline and a match. So my niece will be in charge of distributing whatever amount and whenever she deems appropriate. It's completely at her discretion, because she knows my son, she knows my wishes, and I trust her judgment completely. She's not much older than my son but where he's homeless (in and out of shelters, rehabs, and friends' homes) and barely getting by on a daily basis, she's a successful businesswoman with a good head on her shoulders.
The lawyer asked me if there was a time frame or age limit to this stipulation and I said no, then jokingly said yes, when my niece gets fed up with dealing with my son. I already told her if it gets to that point she has my blessing to say the hell with it, send him a check for any remaining money, and let the chips fall where they may.
Now just waiting for the lawyer to draft the will and then sign the final version and that's done. That's one burden lifted off my shoulders. And I think we got a pretty good deal too...$250 covers my will, my husband's will, power of attorney and durable (medical) will for both of us.
If I go before my husband he's my sole beneficiary, so no problem there. But if I outlive my husband then my son is my sole beneficiary. There won't be much left, but my IRA and stocks that I own could be as much as $10k. Again, not much, but given the horrible choices my son continues to make, giving him that much money would make as much sense as giving a pyromaniac a gallon of gasoline and a match. So my niece will be in charge of distributing whatever amount and whenever she deems appropriate. It's completely at her discretion, because she knows my son, she knows my wishes, and I trust her judgment completely. She's not much older than my son but where he's homeless (in and out of shelters, rehabs, and friends' homes) and barely getting by on a daily basis, she's a successful businesswoman with a good head on her shoulders.
The lawyer asked me if there was a time frame or age limit to this stipulation and I said no, then jokingly said yes, when my niece gets fed up with dealing with my son. I already told her if it gets to that point she has my blessing to say the hell with it, send him a check for any remaining money, and let the chips fall where they may.
Now just waiting for the lawyer to draft the will and then sign the final version and that's done. That's one burden lifted off my shoulders. And I think we got a pretty good deal too...$250 covers my will, my husband's will, power of attorney and durable (medical) will for both of us.