Terryforvols
Member
I have not posted in a while, but come on just to check on everyone's progress. I feel like I have received so much support from just reading this board, not even counting the times I posted during the depths of our H*** with difficult child starting in 2005, that I wanted to give hope to anyone that may be a new poster. Right now, since late fall 2006, we have been in a wonderful, peaceful place.
To recap, our difficult child spent from 3/05-11/05 in Residential Treatment Center (RTC) and other than a short-lived (but problematic) relapse, she has done great. Unfortunately, her relapse caused her some legal problems (which she had managed to avoid previously) and a night in jail, which seemed to really have scared her. She continues to live in TX with her fiance, and decided ON HER OWN, to go back to college and try to get a teaching degree!!! husband and I had decided long ago not to mention school again (she tried at 18 and 20 while on drugs -- obviously, it did not work) and she had just been working customer service jobs. I think she realized that she needed more than a HS degree to make it, but that was not our call. The maturity between college at 18 and 22 is incredible; she sits in the front of the room, asks for help, etc., and is making an A average. We are so proud! She got a large loan that pays for school and living expenses, gave it to husband and me to give her "living" $$ every week (so she won't go through it all at once -- like mother like daughter -- if it's there, she'll spend it). She actually takes care of her bills, etc., without being badgered, just has become so much more responsible. But the greatest thing is that the young woman I knew was buried deep inside due to drugs is out. It is truly a JOY to talk with her on the phone, I used to dread it because there was always a problem, lie, etc. I love talking to her and I am experiencing this child that had been "gone" basically since she started drugs at 16 years old. Now, she still faces legal consequences for her actions, but walks the line she needs to walk and hopefully will come away with probation. She actually doesn't blame anyone but herself for her situation, which is also a change in personality.
Anyway, I may have jinxed us, but have decided if the worst happens again, I have had these joyous months of peace!! For those of you out there who are suffering, I have been there done that and know where you are. I NEVER thought we would survive it, and our marriage almost didn't, or that we would have her back again, but with LOTS of work on HER part and the long-term Residential Treatment Center (RTC), time has healed a lot of wounds. husband and I will be working until 80 because all of our retirement went to her Residential Treatment Center (RTC), but to save her and be where we are now, I would do it again in a heartbeat. Finally, I know that God and our faith is what pulled us and her through. I feel like I have truly experienced faith like never before.
This board is great, just knowing the stories and that there is hope out there is wonderful!!
To recap, our difficult child spent from 3/05-11/05 in Residential Treatment Center (RTC) and other than a short-lived (but problematic) relapse, she has done great. Unfortunately, her relapse caused her some legal problems (which she had managed to avoid previously) and a night in jail, which seemed to really have scared her. She continues to live in TX with her fiance, and decided ON HER OWN, to go back to college and try to get a teaching degree!!! husband and I had decided long ago not to mention school again (she tried at 18 and 20 while on drugs -- obviously, it did not work) and she had just been working customer service jobs. I think she realized that she needed more than a HS degree to make it, but that was not our call. The maturity between college at 18 and 22 is incredible; she sits in the front of the room, asks for help, etc., and is making an A average. We are so proud! She got a large loan that pays for school and living expenses, gave it to husband and me to give her "living" $$ every week (so she won't go through it all at once -- like mother like daughter -- if it's there, she'll spend it). She actually takes care of her bills, etc., without being badgered, just has become so much more responsible. But the greatest thing is that the young woman I knew was buried deep inside due to drugs is out. It is truly a JOY to talk with her on the phone, I used to dread it because there was always a problem, lie, etc. I love talking to her and I am experiencing this child that had been "gone" basically since she started drugs at 16 years old. Now, she still faces legal consequences for her actions, but walks the line she needs to walk and hopefully will come away with probation. She actually doesn't blame anyone but herself for her situation, which is also a change in personality.
Anyway, I may have jinxed us, but have decided if the worst happens again, I have had these joyous months of peace!! For those of you out there who are suffering, I have been there done that and know where you are. I NEVER thought we would survive it, and our marriage almost didn't, or that we would have her back again, but with LOTS of work on HER part and the long-term Residential Treatment Center (RTC), time has healed a lot of wounds. husband and I will be working until 80 because all of our retirement went to her Residential Treatment Center (RTC), but to save her and be where we are now, I would do it again in a heartbeat. Finally, I know that God and our faith is what pulled us and her through. I feel like I have truly experienced faith like never before.
This board is great, just knowing the stories and that there is hope out there is wonderful!!
