I have a girl who just turned 17. She has 2 years of Residential Treatment Center (RTC) in a private and a state fascility. She has years of counseling. Many diagnosis and medications. We also got the, "We can't do anything unless there is bodily harm" thing from the police. She ran over 20 times, was truent most of the few months we have tried putting her in school between RTCs. She steals from us (a new recent behavior) by taking my debit card and replacing it-we think when we are asleep. Have had to change the pin 3 times in last few months. Don't even know how she finds out what it is. They wont arrest her for this as they say it is too hard to prove she took cash. I now lock up everything of value that fits in a safe we purchased. We have stripped the room and taken away every privelage. We had 3 good weeks of no running than wham, she steals. At 17 they will not deal with truency in our state, so we have let her go the GED route. Running? They can run all they want.
The courts do not want to deal with truelly mentally ill kids. Putting them away just makes things even worse. Ours came out with too much new information, strategies etc.....
We can't wait for 18. We are not going to spend one more dime on RTCs. We stand our ground-she breaks rules, we administer consequence, she avoids many by running off. It's helpless and the law makes us responsible until they are 18.
I have done everything, made phone calls, asked God each night to help, come here for support, used collaborative problem solving,see a family therapist, hooked her up with EMDR therapy through the Rape Crisis Center, go to NAMI, have a family advocate, consulted a lawyer, yada, yada!
I hold out for the day that her frontal cortex has enough developement she can apply the things she has learned. I pray for her life. I celebrate every day that she is home and nothing major has happened. If I don't, I will have no hope and go off the deep end. I send you a big hug and the message that you are not alone. I don't have solutions. Just an ear and a full understanding.