pediatrician says diagnosis :V40.9 UNS MENTAL/BEHAVIORAL PROBLEM...

[Confused]

Thank you Wiped Out, MidwestMom,GuideMe and Aimless! Yes, all of you have helped and all great advice! Ok, daughter had her evaluation today! It was 4 1/2 hours and boy oh boy the paperwork! I have never filled out so much questions and ratings! Some I even felt tricked because it was an in between or sometimes hard to explain thing! They tested her academically, as well as other areas as you all mentioned. They went from the pregnancy, birth up till now, how was then , now, etc. She said it was boring, dumb and preschool. He said as hes interviewing and testing, he can put things in or out of the test depending how it goes so they do very depending on the client. He said most testing, they can run 6-8 hrs depending if anything extra is needed. But his he gets done usually in 4 hours.. again depending on the client and what is going on...age ..etc. So results are next week he said be prepared for about 20 pages of report, either bad, good or what we excepted or nothing we expected. So we wait and see. Son goes next week!

Couple questions: daughter says nothing is wrong with her and says she does things with her friends at school etc.. but she doesnt, can they see past that?

: Son may not be upset at appointment and never takes the blame for what he does, always says are not his fault and hes sorry.. but hes not sorry... can they see past that? Will a video of his violence or damages hes done help them?

( yes i told him what really goes on, I admitted my faults of yelling as well)

 

[BusynMember]

A good psychologist can see past the attempts kids make to paint themselves as typical.

Wait for the results and don't worry.

 

[Confused]

Thank you .. at least for son I have a new video for them to hear and some pics.. can I upload a picture of his door here? It doesnt show him, or me or anything other then his part of the door so you can tell me if this is normal for a 8yr old "tantrum" He used a metal part for his closet organizer that latches the shelves on. He was in his room and well.. Ill add it..

 

[Confused]

<---------- well so far today this is the damage my son did to his door..(and bottom portion not shown) He just now pulled down the shower curtain rod out of the wall.. and sooo many other things... still throwing things oh and he bit himself and me! And he has been off the adhd medications.. so this is temper without them! Im gonna try em again tomorrow I couldnt upload it in the thread so used it as avatar......

 

[BusynMember]

Confused, it's not anything my kids ever did. I do think lots of people here can relate to it, but I don't think "normal" so called children have such destructive tantrums. I am glad he will be getting help to get to the root cause of his behavior...then maybe things will settle down for all of you.

 

[Confused]

Thank you MidwestMom. I hope things settle down to....

 

[BusynMember]

Confused...you may not believe this now, but eventually...they will. Promise.

 

[Confused]

Thank you MidwestMom. I know its hard, plus my dad is in last stages of CHF so I also am hoping in his final days he can see my kids can get help and improve...

I have the printed EEG report from son and its driving me crazy that I dont understand. I been looking it up( google) , but you know how that goes. Yes he said it showed violence but reading the report Im not sure I see that? Im wondering depending on daughters report if she should still get an EEG? Ill ask the Dr. 23hrs to go until I get the report and sons turn for the evaluation!

Why does my son act worse for us then neighbors hes known all his life? Yes, hes shown attitude but not extreme like he does with us and some family friends. ( they hear him tho) Same with school , he almost always holds it in ( anger/mouth) and explodes sometimes the second he gets in the car? I think you all told me before I forgot.

 

[InsaneCdn]

Why does my son act worse for us then neighbors hes known all his life?

Home is "safe". It's the one place where he will still be loved or accepted on some level, even if he can't hold it in. So, he does his best when he is "out there", and... falls apart when he comes home.

If it's any consolation... neurotypical teens do the same thing, only not nearly so extreme. I remember reading a book years ago that said that teenagers put on their "two-year-old jammies" when they get home: tired, irritable, unreasonable, sometimes hungry, and prone to throw tantrums". If that happens with neurotypical teens, then... those of us with difficult child kids can surely expect worse behavior at home. That's been my consolation, anyway.

 

[Hope_Floats]

I agree InsaneCdn. I think we all do that, actually. That's why the people who love us the most see us at our worst. We feel "safe" with those people, knowing that they will love us unconditionally and will be less likely to judge us when we "let our hair down".

 

[Confused]

Awww thank you InsaneCdn and Hope_Floats , it makes sense and makes me feel better. Some doctors I go to say its cuz the kids have an issue with me, of course it could be true on some levels I guess.

 

[TerryJ2]

Confused, of course they have an issue with you. You're in charge. And they want to be in charge.
Also, you will learn to parent differently. Then they'll have different issues with you.

 

[Confused]

Thank TerryJ2, you make a good point! Too bad you all cant come with me and talk to family and doctors!!! You all just get everything!!! You all are awsome!!!!!!!