Star - how was it?

[Star*]

Okay to catch you up with my spinning mind - (ready for Mr. Toad's Ride???)

Abridged version:

When we took Dude out of jail and the group home we were told by the bond judge to call public defenders office to get atty. If you live at home the PD goes by your total household income, assets etc. If you live in foster care - you are considered indigent, and qualify for a PD. $40.00 filing fee. $500.00 for PD (no more free rides in SC) and court costs...vs. paying thousands for an atty, court costs, and fees.

When I called the PD office to tell them Dude had moved and to set up getting him indigent PD - they told me to just GO to court - and speak with the solicitor, then if they said we needed a PD - come to their office. THEY (PD OFFICE) made me feel like we (me, caseworker, Dude) could talk with the solicitor after the letter I wrote and get the whole thing dismissed. The PD office had NO idea what they were talking about. Telling me you go to court first here THEN get a PD. Well in a sense they were right -we did go to court and the solicitor said - WHAT? No no - go to the PD office and get counsel. (ROAR)

Dude has been living in Foster care for 2 weeks - which DID qualify him for indigent defense or PD. Had we gone to court and he lived at home - Dude wouldn't have a prayer, I have no money for atty.

Dude is now living in Therapeutic Foster Care. These people are highly trained and have loads of experience dealing with the kids no one else wants to help. ie: Dude. The reason I suggested foster care was because Dude would be closer to home so we COULD see him sometime and keep an eye on him. 145 miles away - is NOT close to home.

And yes - I could get totally lost in a Cracker barrel. I got the biggest laugh out of everyone yelling NO MORE BEANIES (Dear me - 448 small and 38 large NEVER enough) lol.

I think this is good - I mean if we didn't just walk in and the court went - Oh go home - you're charges are dismissed. Then this gives Dude time to get a job, continue doing his GED, and get more settled in with a family that can speak and he listen. Maybe by the time he gets to court he'll be more mature than he was.

Oh - and yes Had to laugh at the Wanted to take a picture of my son in a suit comment. I HAD my Digital ready and waiting! I had visions of pictures of me and him dressed up in a photo - just one. (DF takes awful photos) So i was going to use the timer. And I got the "And Mom - not to be mean - but I do NOT want anyone taking my picture today =it could put me in a bad mood." - so no picture, but had to laugh at the similarities.
(I thought - I bet they have us on video at the courthouse - maybe I could get a still and have it blown up???)

Hugs
Star

 

[DammitJanet]

LOL...Star...dont you know that is the way everyone dresses for court these days?

 

[Star*]

Best shirt I saw yesterday in court?????

A black dude with the Warner Brothers logo - and it said -
I kid you NOT -

If you see the police
WB
Warn a Brotha

Not exactly Chucky - but still - it's quite evident that mental health services in this country and the idea to represent ones self - is not prevailing; at least not here.

Our favorite outfit? The spandex tube top (azure blue) complete with push up padded bra, skin tight that met the top of a spandex skirt about 12 or 13" long from top to bottom in loud colors and design with the 4" clear spike heels with spaghetti straps - complimented with matching cell phone bedazzled with gems and purse that I swear still said Hello Kitty but caseworker said Baby Phat - with a cat face -(I said baby phat has a cat body - not a white cat face with a bow) and enough makeup to give four scary looking women in the front row complete makeovers.

The kicker here? She was about (guessing) 4 or 5 months pregnant.

Even Dude looked and said "And you were worried about MY earrings?"

Nice.

 

[SearchingForRainbows]

Star,

ABSOLUTELY UNBELIEVABLE!!! I guess I really am naive when it comes to court these days!!! If you had had a bucket of popcorn (unbuttered of course, lol), it would have been a better show than going to most movies.

Well, I guess the bright side of this, at least for me, is that if (or should I say, when???) the time comes for me to enjoy the show with difficult child 1, it won't matter if his hair is a greasy mess and it looks like he stuck his finger in a light socket!!! I guess it won't even matter if he has "plumber's crack" - I apologize to any plumbers reading this but I couldn't think of a more "delicate" way to phrase this last sentence. Please forgive me!!!

In all seriousness though, Star, you know I'll be thinking positive thoughts for Dude!!! WFEN

 

[muttmeister]

Well, it sounds like you handled everything as well as you could.
I lived my whole life without going to court or even having a traffic ticket. Then I had difficult children. Now I've been there so often they're getting ready to put my name on a chair so I'll have my own. I think if I were a judge or a court reporter or anybody involved in that end of things I'd want to go live on a desert island and never see a human being again. I can't believe the way people dress and their attitudes and the stories they tell. Surely they can't believe that people are believeing them. These days I think court takes the place of old circus side shows. That's were all the freaks are. And when they get a kid whose family shows up looking like something besides a freak show and the kid is dressed nice and leaves his bling at home, it must impress then just because it is so unusual,
And I'm not surprised about waiting till late summer. That seems to be the way all of these things work. I don't understand why it has to take so long, except that I do know thre are a lot of nuts going through the system so maybe it takes that long to get to everybody but some of the delays sure seem stupid.
Anyway, you did good and we'll keep our fingers crossed for next time.

 

[Star*]

Mutt -

I laughed out loud at work - even the dog came running......thank you for the laugh....

1.) I have never thought about court as a modern day freak show, but you are correct.
2.) I have never EVER thought about my family being the NORMAL people IN a freak show. ((((snort)))) really? so THIS is what normal is? Niiiiiicee.

Still chuckling -

 

[Shari]

difficult child got brought up on minor in possession of alcohol charges (not exactly like dude's, I know), but it was pretty bogus and they knew it. They just kept pushing it back and back til he was 18 and out of the juvie system. Fingers crossed that good things are yet to come...but it does sound promising.

PS - how sweet of Dude to thank everyone. Gives me warm fuzzies.

 

[Estherfromjerusalem]

Star,

Thanks for the update. The court scene sounds incredible.

Hang in there. From the things other people have written here, who have been there themselves, it sounds like there is room for cautious optimism.

Look after yourself,

Love, Esther

 

[susiestar]

Star,

You have a real gift for writing. I think you should put htese experiences into a book. I felt as if I was THERE! I wish I could write like that.

You did a great job advocating for Dude. As he jsut isn't capable of understanding, it is a wonderful thing, and probably the biggest factor in his chances for a productive life.

That woman you described was in court when we went for my bro's divorce. NO, it was not my now exSIL. It was another lady, who was contesting her divorce because she didn't want to divorce while she was pregnant with his best friends baby! She told the judge this! IT was a riot - most of us had to cover our mouths to hide the laughter.

Hugs,

Susie

 

[DammitJanet]

If you loved the spandex outfit you would have just DIED seeing one I saw. This was on some lawyer or paralegal type woman.

She had on this really tight red jacket and skirt outfit. The skirt ended just south of her nether regions! And she had on black stockings with a seam down the back of her legs. Red high heels completed the picture. LOL. Several of us outside just stood and stared.

 

[Star*]

Janet,

I have that outfit......

It came with a whip.

 

[witzend]

husband sat on Grand Jury last year for a month. That's where after the police arrest a suspect, the DA asks the Grand Jury to decide if there is enough evidence to indict, and if not the charges are dropped.

There was the driver who would not open his mouth, whose passenger said it was because he couldn't speak English. Couldn't have had anything to do with the 24 balloons of heroin in his mouth...

But apparently, every day, someone would be arrested with drugs in their pants pocket, and to a man, (or woman) each one claimed "These aren't my pants."

Police officer: "Whose pants are they?"

Dimwit: "I don't know."

PO: "Where were you when you put them on?"

wife: "My girlfriend's house."

PO: "Are they your girlfriend's pants?"

wife: "No."

PO: "What's her name?"

wife: "I don't know."

UGH! Even Lindsay Lohan tried to pull it when she got pulled over with cocaine in her pocket. "These aren't my pants!"