the blame game continues..........

[Scent of Cedar *]

Another learning that I had to repeat to myself a lot is that it's ok to let someone else be wrong. I used to
think, or at least behave as though I think, that it was my responsibility to
educate someone close to me about how or why they were wrong about
something that I was so sure of, and that I thought was important

This is profound.

This is so **** profound!

I love it.

Cedar

P.S. You would be surprised how many people I know are wrong about everything they think they know, when they think they know more than me.

:O)

I love that you posted this for us.

Stellar.

 

[Hope_Floats]

Thanks Cedar. I always think it is so very cool when something that someone else shared with me that is so incredibly and profoundly helpful to me, can be passed on to impact others as well. I think that is part of what all this "life" stuff is about. Thanks for letting me know.

 

[BusynMember]

Ok, that just spoke to me HopeFloats.

Let people be wrong.

Got it!!!! And thanks!!!!

 

[Tanya M]

I think it's the hope that I hold onto that at times brings on the thinking that I might be able to reason with difficult child. Not that hope is a bad thing but I must remind myself of whom I'm dealing with.
I still think hope is a good thing and I will continue to hold hope that "someday" my difficult child will get his life together.
I am also a realist and know that this may never happen.

You can't reason with "crazy". And it will only make you crazy if you try. So I tell myself that a lot. That you can't reason with "crazy".

This is so true!!

It reminds me of another: Insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different result

 

[Scott_G]

I think many of our difficult child's have a form of reality that works to keep them safely tucked inside their illusions, but does not really resemble any truth or logic or reality, it is skewered thinking.

When our son was 17 he finally got in enough trouble with the law that it had become serious. He was being detained for shoplifting while he was supposed to be in court to face another charge. Well the judge gave him the option of jail or a residential treatment program. Any normal person would have chosen the residential treatment and done their best to get through the program. Not our son. He did agree to the treatment program, but soon after we get a panicked phone call from him one evening. Seems that he and a couple of other losers he met up with left the facility, stole a car, and crossed state lines. In typical difficult child fashion (always thinking of themselves) he panicked and ditched the other kids and called us. He was scared that since they committed a felony and he was 17 that he might be tried as an adult if caught and face real jail. We drove over three hours and picked him up. We made him turn himself in. They would not take him back into the program so it was off to juvenile detention for him. He did get a break though. Because he turned himself in, he did not face any additional charges for the car theft. When asked why he did it, he claimed that some other kid in the program told him that they could force him to stay in the program until age 21, but they had to release him from jail at 18. So he broke the rules and got sent to jail because he at least knew for a fact he would be released on his 18th birthday.

Last year (at age 31) he got mad at us for refusing to drive him to a court appearance. He had one car repossessed for not making payments, and he totaled the other one while under the influence (the reason for him having to go to court). We were such awful human beings for being willing to let him miss court and be arrested for failure to appear. Skewered logic indeed and the whole idae that none of their problems are ever their own fault is a big part of it.