Just briefly, my husband was diagnosed with multiple myaloma in early March and has started treatment. We were able last Wednesday to get a message to Josh about his dad's diagnosis through a friend of his with whom I have had some contact in the past. Josh had contacted him out of the blue; the friend notified me, and I asked this friend of Josh's to let him know that his dad had bone cancer and that we needed him to contact us.
The friend relayed the message to Josh, urging him to call us then. He said Josh was very upset at the news and was tearful but didn't want to call or message right then. The friend repeatedly urged Josh to call or message as soon as possible. Well, a week has gone by, and there hasn't been one word from him.
I feel so hurt and disgusted and angry. If your father's cancer diagnosis won't compel you to do the right thing and contact him, what will? I really thought this might create a sense of urgency and propel him to contact us. It appears I was wrong.
There's no such thing as a perfect parent, but we have been good parents to him and have made sacrifices for him. The last two years he has been on the streets in Phoenix have been really hard. Actually, the last ten to twelve years have been hard. Our lives have revolved around "how Josh is doing" from one week to the next, with many instances of helping and "rescuing." And now that we need him, he's nowhere to be found. He can't be bothered to make the time to call us because that would mean being uncomfortable for a few minutes and he's not willing to do that. What kind of person does this to their parent when their parent needs the encouragement and comfort from hearing from their child? The only thing I can come up with is--a selfish, narcissistic jerk.
I'm fed up. Why am I wasting my life, agonizing over someone who cares nothing for us?
The friend relayed the message to Josh, urging him to call us then. He said Josh was very upset at the news and was tearful but didn't want to call or message right then. The friend repeatedly urged Josh to call or message as soon as possible. Well, a week has gone by, and there hasn't been one word from him.
I feel so hurt and disgusted and angry. If your father's cancer diagnosis won't compel you to do the right thing and contact him, what will? I really thought this might create a sense of urgency and propel him to contact us. It appears I was wrong.
There's no such thing as a perfect parent, but we have been good parents to him and have made sacrifices for him. The last two years he has been on the streets in Phoenix have been really hard. Actually, the last ten to twelve years have been hard. Our lives have revolved around "how Josh is doing" from one week to the next, with many instances of helping and "rescuing." And now that we need him, he's nowhere to be found. He can't be bothered to make the time to call us because that would mean being uncomfortable for a few minutes and he's not willing to do that. What kind of person does this to their parent when their parent needs the encouragement and comfort from hearing from their child? The only thing I can come up with is--a selfish, narcissistic jerk.
I'm fed up. Why am I wasting my life, agonizing over someone who cares nothing for us?
