A Visitor Came a knocking “

[susiestar]

I am sorry that life is throwing so much stress at you all at once. It just seems so wrong that you have to handle so much. But who ever asked my opinion?

Do whatever you can to take breaks from your stress right now, to indulge yourself in little ways. Know that we are thinking of you. Don't feel pressured to check in on us. We are here when YOU need us. While we may wonder, and even worry, that is NOT NOT NOT your problem! We are fully capable of coping with that. You have enough to cope with. Come here when it is a help to you, not an extra task.

(((((hugs)))))

 

[RN0441]

LBL

Always with you - I have been out of town then back to work to hundreds of emails.

I saw my therapist last night for the first in a few months. I have had some time to reflect on the last seven years of my life since our son started using drugs. I talked to my therapist about it.

I have so much trouble knowing how to deal with all the pain and betrayal that he caused us. I am so angry. She reminded me that he has been, and is still in, a drug fog. He doesn't even know that he caused pain.

When they are using drugs they DO NOT CARE ABOUT ANYONE, ANYTHING. THEY DO NOT CARE ABOUT THEMSELVES. This means they do not care about their future or any consequences. It is so very very hard to understand this. I know. I struggle with it. How could he just not care???

You are a great momma and love your son to infinity. You know this and he knows this! He is making all the wrong choices right now. Maybe jail is what needs to happen. This time if it happens you can have a clear head and heart. You tried it the other way and he is not strong enough to change on his own. The rehab bed is a goal that seems unattainable right now or in the near future because he is sabotaging this choice.

You have gotten great advice and support here. You are very strong and I do hope that this comes to a head very soon so that he can begin the journey of sobriety.

BIG HUGS.

 

[Lost in sadness]

Oh LBL, right here with you lovely...look after you too, please! Extra hugs xxxx

 

[Littleboylost]

The elusive rehab will it ever happen. Can’t sleep again tonight. Thank you all your worrds get me through.

Sorry my posts are short I will find time on the. Weekend to be more involved. Stressed and exhausted Y’all.

 

[Copabanana]

Hi all.

Rn. Your therapist sounds very wise. Her words about your son's state soothe ME.

I am right there with you trying to fathom the whys and how's of so much betrayal and loss and trying to find my fatal flaw that accounts for it. Not even with my son so much but my mother's, father, sister, family.

I think your anger has a positive aspect. You deserve so much love, care, protection, support. We all do. I have a hard time holding onto this.

I will speak for myself. I have personalized all of this. It feels to be my lack. In some ways I wish my anger to return. It is better than the grief.

 

[startingfresh]

DO NOT CARE ABOUT ANYONE, ANYTHING. THEY DO NOT CARE ABOUT THEMSELVES.

Rn. I have to remember those words. Sadly so very true. Copa, I agree anger helps me to stay strong with the boundaries. I think of all of you warrior moms and have so much respect for what you have been through. LBL, praying a bed opens. I wake up in the middle of the night when my son isn't here so scared and when my brain isn't working hard to replace the scary thoughts with positive ones, and I just don't know how I can do it. I think of you and how you have done the impossible and held the boundaries, giving your son a chance to get better.

 

[Littleboylost]

Hi to all of you. Life has be n insanely hectic and I apologize that I have not been able to respond to each and everyone of your helpful supports and comments.

I got a lovely e mail from rehab and they expressed that my son is top priority for the next opening. There is a hard stop on the Wait The first week of March as there is a planned discharge.

Son finally connected with intake and all is good.

He flunked everything but electricle this semester. This is not a surprise to anyone but him.

Things have been turbulent at Cop moms and he is spending more time at home which is good and bad up and down.

Shock of all shocks he made dinner for us this evening. That is a first. He was very proud he made home made chicken strips with his own secret seasoning. Tonight is a good night and I will take it.

Work has been crazy and that is a post all on its own.

I can not thank you all enough. There is no way I would have made it this far without each of you.

 

[Copabanana]

Good news. Really. All that could be hoped for.

 

[ColleenB]

Yes, take the good night and enjoy it. I’m so glad to hear a bed is coming soon. You have been in a holding pattern and we know that with an addict it’s impossible to not be at high alert at all times! You must be exhausted.

Starting a new job on top of it all must be very difficult. I too started a new job at the height of my sons addiction, twice, and I do not envy you. The tiredness, the unexplained absences.... I remember it all.

Sending some hugs.

 

[Albatross]

Good news that you have a hard date for rehab. At least now you have some certainty.

 

[pasajes4]

Great news I am praying that he takes advantage of this opportunity to turn things around.

 

[recoveringenabler]

Good news LBL......we're all rootin' for you and your son....

 

[susiestar]

 

[Guidance seeker]

That’s such good news LBL, I’m glad things are looking better.

 

[Kalahou]

LBL, Hi. You have been in thoughts and prayers. I have not commented but have been following along. We are in this together and understand. You are steadfast and keeping strong and will get through this.
Be assured - you are going to be alright.

 

[Triedntrue]

I hope this works for both you and your son.

 

[RN0441]

What a joyous day it will be when he enters rehab and gets his head cleared!

Hugs my friend.

 

[Copabanana]

How are you lbl?

 

[Littleboylost]

Struggling son gas a psychiatry appointment today and husband not I can drive him. We have waited 7 months for this appointment. I hope he gets there.

He failed everything in school and is fighting with his girlfriend.
He came home last night and was hsnging with a friend who has been involved in drugs. I gave him a drug text and he gave the usual excuses and didn’t comply. He was high and I know it was more than pot. What can I expect.
Waiting day to day for the rehab bed.
I am in head office orientation for new job. Long days and mandatory dinners. Last day is today. I am exausted.

 

[Triedntrue]

I hope he got there for your sake. Maybe you can relax a little as far as the job. Do something nice for you.