Another put off
- Thread starter wakeupcall
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wakeupcall
Well-Known Member
Pepperidge, my difficult child DOES have some similarities of Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD) behaviors. Up until recently, I didn't believe that children who were adopted at birth could possibly have Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD), but I'm not so sure anymore. On the other hand, when I mentioned to his doctor that the only class he's doing poorly in has a female teacher (his only female teacher) and he's sooooooooooooo mean to me, she says that she has many patients who aren't kind to women, period.
I dunno...............it's so confusing. By the time I get him figured out he'll be grown and gone on to live his life (I hope).
I dunno...............it's so confusing. By the time I get him figured out he'll be grown and gone on to live his life (I hope).
Marguerite
Active Member
Here's hoping that independent testing gives you the answers you need. Talk to them, offer them copies of past results if the psychiatrist thinks it's a good idea, because they may be able to work with those and maybe concentrate their vision on those areas most of concern.
That major discrepancy in the digit span score worries me. But there are other variables here, notably WHO gave him the test. And frankly, from my experience, tests done in the school environment (by either a school counsellor or someone brought in by the education system) are always suspect, in my book.
An example - when I was at school one of our science text book series were written by a Professor Harry Messel, a Sydney University Physics professor. They were very readable, I found them entertaining as well as informative. But they weren't always accurate. We were taught to double-check information. And our teacher's notable comments one day said it all, and were quoted: "I've got you lot well trained. When you notice a discrepancy between Messel and another text, you immediately assume it's Messel who's wrong."
In the same way, a discrepancy between a school-based test and one administered professionally - I would be assuming the school-based test to be the equivalent of Messel.
If you have a large amount of data points and you're plotting them on a graph, with enough points you begin to see a pattern. But if one point is stuck out somewhere very different, away out on its own, we are taught to ignore it as an aberration or anomaly. Clearly something went wrong in that particular measurement.
The only other explanation is a deterioration in digit span, which should be fairly easy for a professional to double-check.
Within one test, are there large discrepancies? If so, what are the sub-tests on the top and bottom of the scores? And what is YOUR gut feeling, concerning difficult child's true abilities?
Marg
That major discrepancy in the digit span score worries me. But there are other variables here, notably WHO gave him the test. And frankly, from my experience, tests done in the school environment (by either a school counsellor or someone brought in by the education system) are always suspect, in my book.
An example - when I was at school one of our science text book series were written by a Professor Harry Messel, a Sydney University Physics professor. They were very readable, I found them entertaining as well as informative. But they weren't always accurate. We were taught to double-check information. And our teacher's notable comments one day said it all, and were quoted: "I've got you lot well trained. When you notice a discrepancy between Messel and another text, you immediately assume it's Messel who's wrong."
In the same way, a discrepancy between a school-based test and one administered professionally - I would be assuming the school-based test to be the equivalent of Messel.
If you have a large amount of data points and you're plotting them on a graph, with enough points you begin to see a pattern. But if one point is stuck out somewhere very different, away out on its own, we are taught to ignore it as an aberration or anomaly. Clearly something went wrong in that particular measurement.
The only other explanation is a deterioration in digit span, which should be fairly easy for a professional to double-check.
Within one test, are there large discrepancies? If so, what are the sub-tests on the top and bottom of the scores? And what is YOUR gut feeling, concerning difficult child's true abilities?
Marg
It is finally being universally recognized that even children adopted at birth can have attachment disorders. I could have told them that years ago and so can many of the adoptive parents that we know.
We were also told that our difficult child's birthmom did not drink while she was pregnant, however she was in alcohol rehab three times over the years preceeding her pregnancy and she was under the influence at the surrender so I don't believe it. My difficult child has many of the Fetal Alcohol Effects (FAE) effects that are discussed in the literature including a huge problem with impulsiveness.
Nancy
We were also told that our difficult child's birthmom did not drink while she was pregnant, however she was in alcohol rehab three times over the years preceeding her pregnancy and she was under the influence at the surrender so I don't believe it. My difficult child has many of the Fetal Alcohol Effects (FAE) effects that are discussed in the literature including a huge problem with impulsiveness.
Nancy
Star*
call 911........call 911
Pamela,
I just wanted to add some more hugs - you'll figure it out. And yes, every day is interesting to say the least.
What about respite? He may need a break as much as you do?
We only tried it twice - but Dude was pretty okay with it. He was treated like the "out of town" grand kid by the people watching him. The other family - well I think you could tell they were in it for the money. After they watched Dude - they said NEVER AGAIN - and I thought - HUH - you had him from Sat afternoon till Sunday at 1:00 - woosie.
Hugs
I just wanted to add some more hugs - you'll figure it out. And yes, every day is interesting to say the least.
What about respite? He may need a break as much as you do?
We only tried it twice - but Dude was pretty okay with it. He was treated like the "out of town" grand kid by the people watching him. The other family - well I think you could tell they were in it for the money. After they watched Dude - they said NEVER AGAIN - and I thought - HUH - you had him from Sat afternoon till Sunday at 1:00 - woosie.
Hugs
Star*
call 911........call 911
Pam,
I also wanted to add this link to Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD) kids -
http://www.radkid.org/childlist.html
It has a checklist that you can do from moderate to severe.
I will tell you also that Dude was diagnosis at one time with Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD). But as time and therapy grew on us all -most of the symptoms went from severe to nil.
Hope this helps.
Hugs
I also wanted to add this link to Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD) kids -
http://www.radkid.org/childlist.html
It has a checklist that you can do from moderate to severe.
I will tell you also that Dude was diagnosis at one time with Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD). But as time and therapy grew on us all -most of the symptoms went from severe to nil.
Hope this helps.
Hugs
TerryJ2
Well-Known Member
I know exactly how you feel, Pamela. I just got on my son's case for the billionth time to take a shower and go to bed and he tried to argue every step of the way. It really wears me out.
And a lot of your son's escapades sound exactly like my son.
Wish I could help, but at least I have a soft shoulder.
And a lot of your son's escapades sound exactly like my son.
Wish I could help, but at least I have a soft shoulder.
wakeupcall
Well-Known Member
The support on this forum is phenomenal. I wish I knew how to thank all of you for undertanding and letting me know that I'm not in this all alone. You are all great friends!!!!!!
