P-nut2004
New Member
Hi all!
I haven't been on for some time so I doubt anyone remembers me. I'm at my wit's end atm & hoping talking to others in my shoes can help some. I'm absolutely overwhelmed right now, I'm in my senior year of college, finishing a double degree program, I will have a BS in Criminal Justice and a BA in psychiatric in July, if I make it til then. That combined with 5 kids, 4 dogs, reptiles, and money troubles would be too much in itself and dealing with three difficult children on top of it all is pure insanity. Our oldest, SJ, has developed dissociative disorder that her p-Dr is concerned may be heading for borderline pd, she has had to be completely banned from any access to the internet now as she is otherwise consumed by rpgs and blogs, she causes the other two difficult children to act out and melt down constantly bc she just can't keep herself from constantly policing and harassing them. She is such a smart kid and so mature for her age but I pray daily that she will develop some sort of permanent laryngitis bc every time she opens her mouth my anxiety goes up. The youngest daughter, LM, is completely out of control, she lies constantly for no reason, steals pointlessly, she does no work at school, cries all day, hides under her desk, destroys classroom supplies, comes home ill every day and refuses to do HW, and has a meltdown regardless of what you do, nothing is good enough, it's like having an incredibly smart 2yr old. Our oldest DS, MC, was doing better this year but now has gone down hill, he had had almost no issue at school this year until about 6 weeks ago, now I'm getting phone calls again that he's refusing to do work, crawling in the floor, throwing things, destroying things, being ugly to teachers....at home he is not as bad unless something sets him off, then we go into a meltdown of epic proportions; screaming and yelling 'I hate you, you're stupid, you don't love me, you're just mean' I'm sure some of you know this script, then when he gets sent to his room or looses privileges for the meltdown he gets violent, lashing out at whoever (siblings, parents, pets) has to be restrained (and for weighing only 50lbs he is strong when he's flipping out) he will progress from yelling to unintelligible grunting and squealing and then once we're both exhausted he will give up, take a nap and wake up a different kid, apologizing to everyone. The three difficult children feed off of each other, husband is a Marine and although he understands their issues he loses the ability to see the sx as part of the disorders when they are out of control and he goes overboard, then I have to convince him to walk away and I end up handling all the meltdowns and tantrums. And of course the two PCs are suffering through this. RB, our 4yr old, is incredibly resilient, just stays out of the way and minds his own business. JB however ends up in the middle of things and I think she is developing some major anxiety from all of the chaos. Being in my last few senior classes I have major coursework and there is not enough time in the day to do my HW, housework and run errands while the kids are gone to school so I juggle everything with them there most of the time (husband works 40-50hrs a week). I have night classes which leaves husband to do the evening routine atleast 2 nights a week, which is at best chaos and at worst disastrous. On his own husband can only manage the basics, dinner, baths and bedtime, so I come home to the house completely destroyed at 11 at night and stay up trying to get it ready for the morning routine. I seriously want to find a hole & crawl in it right now. I have a senior thesis project I have to do for psychiatric which I chose to do on the experiences of parents with special needs children, so I'm doing interviews which of course I cannot do with kids at home unless I do them online, and I have this massive pile of data to analyze but I'm not done yet (incidentally if anyone is interested in participating PM me) and that is only one of three classes I'm taking, plus I'm assisting with editing a textbook our psychiatric dept heads are writing. So yea........... I know this is a HUGE post but considering I haven't been on in forever I felt it necessary to give you guys the full rundown. If anyone has any advice for dealing with any of this feel free .... I need all the help I can get lol
I haven't been on for some time so I doubt anyone remembers me. I'm at my wit's end atm & hoping talking to others in my shoes can help some. I'm absolutely overwhelmed right now, I'm in my senior year of college, finishing a double degree program, I will have a BS in Criminal Justice and a BA in psychiatric in July, if I make it til then. That combined with 5 kids, 4 dogs, reptiles, and money troubles would be too much in itself and dealing with three difficult children on top of it all is pure insanity. Our oldest, SJ, has developed dissociative disorder that her p-Dr is concerned may be heading for borderline pd, she has had to be completely banned from any access to the internet now as she is otherwise consumed by rpgs and blogs, she causes the other two difficult children to act out and melt down constantly bc she just can't keep herself from constantly policing and harassing them. She is such a smart kid and so mature for her age but I pray daily that she will develop some sort of permanent laryngitis bc every time she opens her mouth my anxiety goes up. The youngest daughter, LM, is completely out of control, she lies constantly for no reason, steals pointlessly, she does no work at school, cries all day, hides under her desk, destroys classroom supplies, comes home ill every day and refuses to do HW, and has a meltdown regardless of what you do, nothing is good enough, it's like having an incredibly smart 2yr old. Our oldest DS, MC, was doing better this year but now has gone down hill, he had had almost no issue at school this year until about 6 weeks ago, now I'm getting phone calls again that he's refusing to do work, crawling in the floor, throwing things, destroying things, being ugly to teachers....at home he is not as bad unless something sets him off, then we go into a meltdown of epic proportions; screaming and yelling 'I hate you, you're stupid, you don't love me, you're just mean' I'm sure some of you know this script, then when he gets sent to his room or looses privileges for the meltdown he gets violent, lashing out at whoever (siblings, parents, pets) has to be restrained (and for weighing only 50lbs he is strong when he's flipping out) he will progress from yelling to unintelligible grunting and squealing and then once we're both exhausted he will give up, take a nap and wake up a different kid, apologizing to everyone. The three difficult children feed off of each other, husband is a Marine and although he understands their issues he loses the ability to see the sx as part of the disorders when they are out of control and he goes overboard, then I have to convince him to walk away and I end up handling all the meltdowns and tantrums. And of course the two PCs are suffering through this. RB, our 4yr old, is incredibly resilient, just stays out of the way and minds his own business. JB however ends up in the middle of things and I think she is developing some major anxiety from all of the chaos. Being in my last few senior classes I have major coursework and there is not enough time in the day to do my HW, housework and run errands while the kids are gone to school so I juggle everything with them there most of the time (husband works 40-50hrs a week). I have night classes which leaves husband to do the evening routine atleast 2 nights a week, which is at best chaos and at worst disastrous. On his own husband can only manage the basics, dinner, baths and bedtime, so I come home to the house completely destroyed at 11 at night and stay up trying to get it ready for the morning routine. I seriously want to find a hole & crawl in it right now. I have a senior thesis project I have to do for psychiatric which I chose to do on the experiences of parents with special needs children, so I'm doing interviews which of course I cannot do with kids at home unless I do them online, and I have this massive pile of data to analyze but I'm not done yet (incidentally if anyone is interested in participating PM me) and that is only one of three classes I'm taking, plus I'm assisting with editing a textbook our psychiatric dept heads are writing. So yea........... I know this is a HUGE post but considering I haven't been on in forever I felt it necessary to give you guys the full rundown. If anyone has any advice for dealing with any of this feel free .... I need all the help I can get lol