difficult child is out of money

[InsaneCdn]

Janet -
Banks don't LIKE to do this, but they are well able to.
You can get a credit card with a VERY low limit... like $250 or $500.
The kind of amount that fits something you would spend normally in a month, like on groceries and such.
Then, you use the credit card instead of cash, and use the cash to pay on the credit card...

The bank would rather give you a $5000 limit or more... they WANT you to over-stretch. Don't take it.

Best line I've found recently for getting a low-limit card is that you "need it for small internet purchases, and don't want a higher limit in case of fraud".

 

[DammitJanet]

Thats what I applied for, a small internet credit card and found out my credit score was in the toilet. I was shocked. I thought I had done something so wonderful by buying my car and paying it on time religiously. I was certain that by doing that I was building my credit well. Guess I fooled myself. Whats stupid is I keep getting credit card apps in the mail and even some that come in my name as if I were a business. That really astounds me. I am not a business and there is no reason for them to think I am. There is no where that I hold myself out as a business even on my taxes as any 1099. I dont get it. I do think after Xmas is over I am going to get my bank to give me a credit card that is secured by my savings account. I think they charge outrageous interest which ticks me off but that may be the only way to help me. I can pay it off every month and hopefully that will make things better.

 

[Star*]

Won't it be great when she starts handing YOU money?

It's really not the money that will matter to you then - It's the level of responsibility that will make you fear the 'now what do I wait for?" and then.....little by little things fall into place, you breath a little easier, and a little easier, and a little easier until eventually you breath without being conscious of holding your breath.

Each step in this process seems to take so much out of us (both them and us) that by the time it's all over? It truly seemed like life went by in a blink.

I believe you and husband made an excellent choice, well thought out, and one you can live with. You have a daughter that is trying, working, asking for help - not stealing, not doing drugs or drinking - and in that? I see many, many positives that far outweigh a loan, or gift of fifty dollars.

The above that I wrote? I can say because I just received my first Money Gram for $75 dollars. I put it in an account that I won't touch (and laughed when I put it there) thinking 'Oh how long before he asks for it back?' so far it's been three months. FYI.

Hugs & Love
Star

 

[InsaneCdn]

I do think after Xmas is over I am going to get my bank to give me a credit card that is secured by my savings account. I think they charge outrageous interest which ticks me off but that may be the only way to help me. I can pay it off every month and hopefully that will make things better.

Janet - if you pay the CC off in full every month, then the interest rate doesn't matter... because you don't get charged interest until AFTER the statement is due to be paid. And yes, even if it is secured by your savings acct, on the credit report it shows as revolving credit...

 

[susiestar]

Janet, have you checked your credit with all 3 credit bureaus? Finding your name as if you had a business is a huge red flag for identity theft. Considering all the problems you have had with neighbors in the past, I would get that checked TODAY.


Nancy, the mom and pop gas station thing isn't advertised. They don't even tell regulars about it most of the time. I know only because I overheard them.

IF she is making a sincere effort to be frugal or at least reasonable, and she would be open to this, consider getting a copy of The tightwad Gazette for her. It is a book, well 3 of them but you can get them in one big book and save some $$) that has a ton of different ways to save $$. I like it with the kids because it shows how they figured out how much something cost and it shows how to compare prices before you buy things. I know it seems logical to me, but not all people can see that. in my opinion it would be an awesome Xmas or birthday gift. the prices they quote are way out of date (I have had the books for 2o years, got the first one the first xmas husband and I were married) but the ideas, concepts and recipes aren't. the recipes in it are doable, usually easy, and mostly are cheap or are cheaper than a brand name or restaurant equivalent.

Does she cook? If she likes to eat out, consider getting one of the Top Secret Recipe cookbooks, or the Americas Most Wanted Recipe cookbooks. The guy who writes the Top Secret books also has a tv show (I think it is on CMT) so it might catch her interest. The Top Secret/Amer Most Wanted Recipes books offer alternatives to eating out that can still give you the taste of many favorite foods. I have found that a lot of the college age kids around here will try a Top Secret type of recipe even if they would never try the same thing out of a regular cookbook.

 

[svengandhi]

Signorina and JJJ -

Thanks for the suggestions. I am also looking into Credo, a social activist group that apparently buys minutes from Sprint and reseslls them. They sometimes offer packages which include a buyout credit. My son got the phone for $99 (instead of $799) when he opened a two year account. He put his girlfriend on his account, which ****** me off. He has a data plan, which he did downgrade as well. He is probably going to give me the smartphone, as I have just a regular phone with no email, internet or anything; I call it the dumb phone. Right now, I am keeping his line on my account open because it has an unlimited grandfathered in data plan. When I renew in April, I will put his smartphone on my account, probably change my number to his old one and then I will have the data plan. I can't suspend his service, he doesn't live at home and uses the phone for work (which is another reason why I paid - he doesn't earn money if his boss can't reach him). He did pick up his grandma and aunt for Tday which meant H didn't have to do it, so I gave him $20 for gas when he came by. As for his car, it's 5 years older than he is and he's 21 and he helps H with the maintenance and repair work on it. He doesn't complain about not having a cool new car.

It's the mild Aspieness that makes him a combo of impulse shopper and not being able to wait. However, he is getting better as he gets older. When he first started working, he would blow his week's pay on video games and candy. Now, he is trying to save some money. He canceled some of his online games, etc. He and his roomies are hitting the supermarket and cooking at home more instead of eating out at diners and fast food. I wish he'd go back to college but he's not ready yet.

Anyway, if 3 years ago you had told me my oldest son would be working steadily, would be polite and trying to be responsible, I would have said whose son are you talking about? If only he would shave his hideous beard (and convince his 15 year old brother, Yetiboy, to shave his)... Ah well, at least their beards are gorgeous shades of blonde.

 

[Nancy]

Susie, I'm going to look into that book, sounds like a great idea. We had a long talk yesterday about money and ways to save. We sent her back with a lot of leftovers and a loaf of bread and some plastic containers to bring food to work to save money. She seemed very receptive. We filled her gas tank up and told her it had to last until next Thursday payday. She going to start asking for rides to AA rather than always being the one driving. I'm sure you know that AA rides are a big thing and once you have a car you are encouraged to pick up others for meetings. We told her that was fine as long as everyone chipped in a couple dollars for gas.

Nancy

 

[susiestar]

The books are wonderful. The muffin recipe shows you how to do it with whatever is on hand - how to adjust for adding applesauce, or using leftover oatmeal in it, etc... It has the best granola recipe I have ever found. The ways to save money really work, and it gives you a very different perspective to view your spending habits.

Tightwad Gazette was actually a newsletter. Then it was made into a book, then a 2nd, and finally a 3rd. When the writer decided to move on, the newsletter stopped. But she covered a TON of things. They have the books all in one called the Complete Tightwad Gazette. Look at ebay, amazon marketplace, abebooks.com and alibris to find a good used cope (I have gotten books from each of those places with no problems - and what they call good is usually quite fine. Here is a list of them on amazon: http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_sb_s...rds=tightwad+gazette&sprefix=tightwad+gazette . The best one is at the top. I have read a lot of the other fugal, miserly whatever books. Tightwad Gazette is still my fave. Esp as she talks about making your choices fit your home and lifestyle - as in you don't have to keep every container from the bakery and wash it out and save it for when you need it. Save only as many as you will really use, and don't let the stuff you are saving run you out of your home - that type of thing. It also is the least preachy for the most part.

Some of the ideas are super easy, like making your own flavored coffees, and saving a TON of $$ when you do eat out by not ordering drinks. Paying $2 for a coke when you won't drink even close to $2 worth is super easy. It makes a big diff in a tight budget.

If you want, I can give directions to make the starbucks type drinks. I used to manage a cafe in a Barnes and Noble and had to go through the full Starbucks training. I can't belive the prices they charge - it is just outrageous!

 

[DammitJanet]

Susie, when I ordered my credit report they only sent me one and told me I could only get one from a single credit agency each year free. Since the credit agency that was used to deny me was experion, that is who they sent me. I used the website that is listed on the government site so it was real and I knew it wasnt a scam to make me pay money in some way. So many of them say free credit reports but then try to hook you in to paying for something.

 

[DazedandConfused]

All three major credit reporting agencies, by law, must give consumers a free copy, upon request, of their credit report once a year.

This is the website. www.annualcreditreport.com

I used to subscribe to Amy Daccyczyn's newsletter after seeing her and the family on Donahue eons ago. I remember some people really going after her, but I thought what she did made sense; I got a lot of great ideas from her and it helped my family through some very lean times. It's not like someone has to do exactly like she did. I was sad when she decided to stop writing it. But, she wanted to spend more time with her family.