difficult child starts this morning . . . new worries
- Thread starter Kathy813
- Start date
She called while I was teaching my online class so I told her that I couldn't talk to her right then and that I would call her back. She hasn't answered but just texted me that she was at a meeting.
The few seconds that we could talk she said she loved it. She was only there for 5 hours today since she is just training. He said once the training part was over he would want her to be there full-time.
But wouldn't you know . . . she got two more calls today for interviews! She said she might still go on her days off as a "back-up" plan. I'm not sure whether to encourage that or not.
~Kathy
The few seconds that we could talk she said she loved it. She was only there for 5 hours today since she is just training. He said once the training part was over he would want her to be there full-time.
But wouldn't you know . . . she got two more calls today for interviews! She said she might still go on her days off as a "back-up" plan. I'm not sure whether to encourage that or not.
~Kathy
Kathy if she has the time to go she should go. It's good to have a back-up. The three jobs my difficult child has had since being in the sober house were all gotten because she continued going on interviews even after she took the first job. She wanted to make sure she had a backup in case something happened and we know something happened. She was able to call them and start where she left off in the interview process. So the three places she interviewed with she ended up working at all three.
I'm thrilled that she had a good first day, that's a good sign.
Nancy
I'm thrilled that she had a good first day, that's a good sign.
Nancy
S
Signorina
Guest
Wonderful news and YES - she should go! At the very least, it's good practice interviewing! And ditto what Nancy said! Yay for steps forward...hope the juju continues...
DDD
Well-Known Member
Yeah, difficult child! No input on further interviewing. Actually I'm not sure what I think. If there is a dollar factor or a convenience factor, or a scheduling factor maybe. Perhaps it's too early in the morning for me to focus, lol. It's possible it is a generational thing too. Back in the day you were discouraged from changing horses mid race. Of course the assumption in those days was that you would have a caring workplace that would become like a second home. Guess I'll pass on input. I just so hope she will be able to be proud of herself. Hugs DDD
buddy
New Member
I agree it is just good practice to interview no matter if you are intending on the job or not. My first professional interview was a disaster. It made me go home, do research and practice.....I was offered both of the next two jobs I interviewed for. That dud interview did me a lot of good. I hope she wouldn't need it for a back up but if she does that is a good point too.
Did she call you???? Did she give you any specifics? I am really hoping it went well. I was thinking, with so many people in recovery these days, her co-workers may be people who love and care for someone in their lives so get it, or may themselves be in recover. I am hoping for that situation for her. (Again, a girl can hope!)
Did she call you???? Did she give you any specifics? I am really hoping it went well. I was thinking, with so many people in recovery these days, her co-workers may be people who love and care for someone in their lives so get it, or may themselves be in recover. I am hoping for that situation for her. (Again, a girl can hope!)
One of the other jobs (the one close to my house) said that it offered benefits. I don't think the small salon that she is now has benefits. I think that would be the only reason she should consider going to the interview.
I have a problem with accepting one job and then possibly immediately leaving for another job. I don't think it is fair to the current job and is probably wasting the time of the interviewer at the other job.
However, I don't know why I worry about corporate America considering what has been done to my husband over the past 5 years. They certainly don't worry about the employees any more.
She never called back last night but that is not unusual for my difficult child. She tends to call when she wants/needs something.
~Kathy
I have a problem with accepting one job and then possibly immediately leaving for another job. I don't think it is fair to the current job and is probably wasting the time of the interviewer at the other job.
However, I don't know why I worry about corporate America considering what has been done to my husband over the past 5 years. They certainly don't worry about the employees any more.
She never called back last night but that is not unusual for my difficult child. She tends to call when she wants/needs something.
~Kathy
DDD
Well-Known Member
Although I say I'm not an expert (true) I have been to a bunch of salons in my lifetime. Back in the 50's and 60's "everybody" went to the salon weekly. There is such a different environment from one to another. There's one in our town with a hyper owner, a hyper friend beautifican and a huge dog, lol.
There seem to be salons for young people, middle age people and old people. Because of that I guess finding a "good fit" with a "steady clientele" and a history of "employment stability" would be a challenge.
Benefits, I assume, would be an unusual big plus. Hours could include nights and/or weekends at some and daytime at another. Yikes. This is a challenge. Fingers crossed that she finds the right fit. DDD
There seem to be salons for young people, middle age people and old people. Because of that I guess finding a "good fit" with a "steady clientele" and a history of "employment stability" would be a challenge.
Benefits, I assume, would be an unusual big plus. Hours could include nights and/or weekends at some and daytime at another. Yikes. This is a challenge. Fingers crossed that she finds the right fit. DDD
pinevalley
Member
I am so glad that her first day on the job went well! We are all rooting for her!
DDD, one thing that is a big plus at this current salon is the hours. difficult child has to work 11 - 7 on Tuesdays through Fridays and 9 - 6 on Saturdays. difficult child is not a morning person so she loves not having to be at the salon until 11:00 am during the week.
I am supposed to meet her tonight to buy her a few more "business casual" work outfits which is what the owner told her she needed to wear. difficult child definitely does not have a business casual wardrobe. I told her we will buy a pair of pants and another skirt and then find some tops to mix and match. I had already bought her a skirt and a couple of tops for interviews that she can also wear to work. I worry about it because difficult child does not have any sense of how to dress appropriately.
~Kathy
I am supposed to meet her tonight to buy her a few more "business casual" work outfits which is what the owner told her she needed to wear. difficult child definitely does not have a business casual wardrobe. I told her we will buy a pair of pants and another skirt and then find some tops to mix and match. I had already bought her a skirt and a couple of tops for interviews that she can also wear to work. I worry about it because difficult child does not have any sense of how to dress appropriately.
~Kathy
Kathy it may be better not to rock the boat, and not to get involved so that if it doesn't work out you are not to blame. But these are my thoughts.
Benefits is a big deal and any employer would understand leaving one job for another that offered benefits. It's easy to explain, she had a lot of resumes out there and received an offer that gave benefits. difficult child actually left the second animal clinic she worked at for three weeks because the current one called her and offered her full time and higher pay and it was too good to pass up. She explained that to her employer and they offered to increase her pay and said they would try to give her full time soon. She explained that while she was very grateful to them for the job she was self supporting and had to take the job that paid more. They were very understanding and no hard feelings. I think that is very reasonable and happens quite frequently especially in the low paying jobs our difficult children are in.
BUT and this is a big but, I'm not sure you want her that close to your home and that far from her current living arrangement, so you should probably not mention that one to her. I don't know about the other one, but if the pay is higher and they have benefits it doesn't hurt to go on the interview to see what the fit is. I agree with DDD, it's important to have a very good fit in these small shops where everyone is so close.
Gone are the days you and I are use to where you took a job and had loyalty and the company had loyalty to you. It's now about which one can pay your living expenses.
So I may tell her about the other job, not the one close to your house, and let her make the decision whether she wants to pursue it so that it is on her. If she feels very comfortable with the job she has, so be it. She should just keep the contact for future. She can call them and thank them and tell them she just accepted a position but that she would be interested in talking to them in the future if this didn't work out.
FWIW if this were difficult child and the job she had offered no benefits and another one did, she would have to consider it because she couldn't go much longer with no health coverage.
Nancy
Benefits is a big deal and any employer would understand leaving one job for another that offered benefits. It's easy to explain, she had a lot of resumes out there and received an offer that gave benefits. difficult child actually left the second animal clinic she worked at for three weeks because the current one called her and offered her full time and higher pay and it was too good to pass up. She explained that to her employer and they offered to increase her pay and said they would try to give her full time soon. She explained that while she was very grateful to them for the job she was self supporting and had to take the job that paid more. They were very understanding and no hard feelings. I think that is very reasonable and happens quite frequently especially in the low paying jobs our difficult children are in.
BUT and this is a big but, I'm not sure you want her that close to your home and that far from her current living arrangement, so you should probably not mention that one to her. I don't know about the other one, but if the pay is higher and they have benefits it doesn't hurt to go on the interview to see what the fit is. I agree with DDD, it's important to have a very good fit in these small shops where everyone is so close.
Gone are the days you and I are use to where you took a job and had loyalty and the company had loyalty to you. It's now about which one can pay your living expenses.
So I may tell her about the other job, not the one close to your house, and let her make the decision whether she wants to pursue it so that it is on her. If she feels very comfortable with the job she has, so be it. She should just keep the contact for future. She can call them and thank them and tell them she just accepted a position but that she would be interested in talking to them in the future if this didn't work out.
FWIW if this were difficult child and the job she had offered no benefits and another one did, she would have to consider it because she couldn't go much longer with no health coverage.
Nancy
Nancy, I have to buy her the clothes. I'm afraid that she will lose the job if she shows up dressed in what she normally wears.
As far as the other interviews, they have called her and I am out of the picture. She can decide whether to go to them or not. One of them is the one close to our house but she has already talked with them so I have no control over whether she goes to that interview or not.
I understand what you are saying. Once she has the clothes that she needs, I am letting go and hope that she keeps the job or finds one that she likes better. I did tell her that we would continue paying for the halfway house until she finishes the program which is in a month and a half. I figure she will need that time to save up some paychecks and find another place to live. I also like the idea of her being in the program during the initial stages of employment so they can help her make the transition to the real world.
~Kathy
As far as the other interviews, they have called her and I am out of the picture. She can decide whether to go to them or not. One of them is the one close to our house but she has already talked with them so I have no control over whether she goes to that interview or not.
I understand what you are saying. Once she has the clothes that she needs, I am letting go and hope that she keeps the job or finds one that she likes better. I did tell her that we would continue paying for the halfway house until she finishes the program which is in a month and a half. I figure she will need that time to save up some paychecks and find another place to live. I also like the idea of her being in the program during the initial stages of employment so they can help her make the transition to the real world.
~Kathy
I just talked to her and asked her that. This salon just says business casual and doesn't care about the colors . . . even for the stylists. That helps because difficult child does have some cute dresses that are not black. She said that she promised to go babysitting with her reformed difficult child friend (who is a nanny) tonight so she didn't want to go get clothes.
Works for me. Now husband and I can go out for a nice dinner.
difficult child was really excited to tell me that they were all taken out for an expensive lunch today (owner's treat) and that she is scheduled to get her hair done (for free) next Thursday. She is going blonde again (not even close to her natural color).
So all is good in difficult child's world.
~Kathy
Works for me. Now husband and I can go out for a nice dinner.
difficult child was really excited to tell me that they were all taken out for an expensive lunch today (owner's treat) and that she is scheduled to get her hair done (for free) next Thursday. She is going blonde again (not even close to her natural color).
So all is good in difficult child's world.
~Kathy
