Hi Worried: I am reminded of an incident with my daughter last summer. She is 46 and has been very difficult, having ended up homeless this summer. She has attempted suicide twice, and has just plain lived a life of irresponsibility. Well, your post reminded me of this: After watching her and her loser boyfriend (who looks like and acts like lurch on the Adams family only possibly dangerous) I confronted her about what looked like drug use (I suspect Meth). She became enraged, cut off all contact with both me and my sister who was with me at the time, accused us of trying to stage an intervention, and refused to discuss it. In her accusations she said that we were unfair, that she does not use and we were treating her terrible. Now what she does not know is that her brother, who is currently in jail for Meth, has told me of the fact that she has used Meth and has a real problem. She blames her constant sores on her diabetes, but he says its the Meth, she picks herself until she bleeds after using. I don't tell her this, but I do tell her that people will only be able to come to conclusions by what they see and what I see is sores all over her, sleeping all the time, irrational behavior and other symptoms of drug use. My son told me that he asked her one time why she lies to us about this, he says to her that don't you think they know your lying? She said to him that as long as she never admits it, as far was anyone goes it does not exist. And so I have taken the stand that it is her life and she will have to fend for herself. This is hard stuff, and it has caused me lots of pain and still does. She is doing better, at least on paper. After being kicked out of her daughters house in July here in Indiana, she ended up in Missouri, with her other daughter who put a time limit on her being there. She got a job, and with some family help now has an apartment. But she remains detached, no calls, no gratitude, no family connection. If I call her she answers or not, depending upon her mood. Many times she does not answer. She has not asked for help since the apartment and job. If I ask her how she is she just says ok, just working and sleeping. So there is still no relationship except for a few calls. I have let her know that if she is unable to make this work there, that she will have to enter a homeless shelter and get the type of help they can offer, since I am not able to help with housing, employment, and other life needs like the shelters can. She says that she will kill herself first. So it goes on and on. Take heart, this forum will help keep YOU sane, and that is why I keep coming here. I cant keep my children sane only myself and that is with help. Nice to see you on here.
