How do you stop living in fear over what could happen to your difficult child?

[lovemysons]

Kathy,
Thank you for the wisdom and the suggestion.

Yesterday I called young difficult child's probation officer and told her of young difficult child's alcoholism and asked her if the court could help him. She told me he has had plenty of opportunity to get help on his own and that it would be up to his attorney, the prosecutor, and the Judge.
So, then I called his attornery. Her office told me that she was in court and that young difficult child had to give permission for she and I to discuss him. She said would give my name and number to his attorney but no guarantee that I would get a call back.

I don't know if young difficult child will give permission for me to speak. I know he does not like me to ever bring up mental illness issues that he has: Bipolar, Anxiety, Depression...suicidal tendencies and so on.

I will call his attorneys office again today and try to verify that his attorney got my name and number and ask that she try and get permission from young difficult child for me to speak with her.

On a side note...I finally got a letter from young difficult child the other day. He said he is about to be made a "trustee" and that he is in minimum security. Says that..."I play spades and bet lunch and dinner trays. Some days I eat alot others not so much."
He goes on to say that that he does not want us to worry about him...says he can go without money on his books just to "please help daughter in law and the kids."

LMS

 

[lovemysons]

Toughlovin,
It is so sad that our difficult child's have been given so much to make opportunity with and yet they take the hard road.
husband and I were discussing the other night all of the many ways that young difficult child has been blessed. All of the many opportunities to succeed he has had. You just got to keep believing that at some point it will materialise and we will see the "fruits of our labor". Meanwhile...we wait.
Can't tell you how very tired I am of the "wait".

LMS

 

[Tiredof33]

I have lived with this fear for so long! I keep reminding myself difficult child is God's child and it is out of my hands. If it ever was in my hands! I try to face the fact that when he threatens suicide and cuts himself that one day he may actually do it.
It's hard!!!
Blessings to us all!

 

[compassion]

I have had quitw the week related to this. She has stole cars, done a lot of mj. I told her today that she was defintly protecdted and how incrdibly garateful I am that no one got hurt, the cdar did got wrecked and no arrests. She sees p-doctor tomorrow.