CAmom
Member
Our son was doing fairly well, made his status in his group home, and had a great visit home last weekend. Because he was on status, we were also able to take him out on a day pass this weekend.
He spent a lot of the day talking about his plans when he gets out of his program in about ten weeks, i.e., graduating from high school, learning to drive, going to a vocational college, etc. This is a first for him. He surfed the net and did research on used cars, wheels, and a sound system for the car he hopes to get for graduation (the jury is still out on that one...) and generally seemed more positive and goal oriented than we've ever seen him.
Then, BAM! Last night, he apparently fell apart, and LEFT his house! This is not a locked facility, but he has never done this before as it's considered a major infraction of the rules. His easy child found him on a street close to the house, distraught, asking to be sent back to Juvenile Hall. Later, he called and told us that he had done "something stupid" but didn't want to talk about it.
Thankfully, his easy child who seems to really care about helping rather than punishing the boys, told him he was NOT interested in terminating him and sending him back to JH as that wouldn't help him but rather wanted him to get back on status and complete his program.
He told me that he feels that our son probably became anxious about the weight of the responsibility he is feeling, now that he's finally starting to think about his future, and decided to relieve the anxiety by giving up and doing something bad enough to get himself terminated and sent back to JH where there are no such expectations.
This makes sense, I guess, but I'm baffled by the abrupt change over a few hours of time from upbeat and positive to so down in the dumps that he risked being terminated from his program.
Any insights?
He spent a lot of the day talking about his plans when he gets out of his program in about ten weeks, i.e., graduating from high school, learning to drive, going to a vocational college, etc. This is a first for him. He surfed the net and did research on used cars, wheels, and a sound system for the car he hopes to get for graduation (the jury is still out on that one...) and generally seemed more positive and goal oriented than we've ever seen him.
Then, BAM! Last night, he apparently fell apart, and LEFT his house! This is not a locked facility, but he has never done this before as it's considered a major infraction of the rules. His easy child found him on a street close to the house, distraught, asking to be sent back to Juvenile Hall. Later, he called and told us that he had done "something stupid" but didn't want to talk about it.
Thankfully, his easy child who seems to really care about helping rather than punishing the boys, told him he was NOT interested in terminating him and sending him back to JH as that wouldn't help him but rather wanted him to get back on status and complete his program.
He told me that he feels that our son probably became anxious about the weight of the responsibility he is feeling, now that he's finally starting to think about his future, and decided to relieve the anxiety by giving up and doing something bad enough to get himself terminated and sent back to JH where there are no such expectations.
This makes sense, I guess, but I'm baffled by the abrupt change over a few hours of time from upbeat and positive to so down in the dumps that he risked being terminated from his program.
Any insights?