Icefairy88
New Member
hi. I came looking for answers through Google and by chance, was connected to this website, which by fake, is probably the best place for me to be right now.
This morning, my 10 year old daughter had another fight, and I said some pretty nasty things.
I had my daughter when I was 17. I've been with her dad for close to 12 years now, and we have two boys, almost 8 and almost 4. My daughter was diagnosed when she was 5 with severe, classic ADHD, and cannot function as a person without medication.
I've never been able to have a bond with her because of the behavioural problems she has. Blatantly disrespecting rules, going around home doing whatever it is she wants, regardless of what anybody has said against it, and regardless of consequences. She is aware of right and wrong, but it's like she doesn't care.
I know it's not how I've raised her, because I see her two younger brothers as functioning children and following rules, and just all around good kids, and then I look at her behaviour, and it's like I've failed as a parent with her.
This morning, it was about simple things. She is not aloud anything but breakfast food in the ring ; cereal, waffles, toast etc., and there she goes eating a 3/4 of a bag of gummy worms. We have an elf on the shelf come to our house, and I did something fun last night and toilet papered the whole tree. Well she didn't like it, and took everything down before her brothers could see it.
These are very small instances. she things everything's a game for her. She can't be within 3 feet of her brothers without causing fights. She can't play with them without having her brothers scream at her. I can't have food in the house without her eating it all, or wasting it. I can't leave her alone for two minutes because she will destroy something even though she knows right from wrong. She makes her 3, almost 4 year old brother look like he knows right from wrong, and my almost 8 year old is literally close to a goddamn angel! It's like she completely LACKS any common sense or caring if she's doing something wrong.
I don't know how much I can't take of this. She has beaten the love out of me for her. Shes only 10, and I am terrified for her teens to come. I don't know how much more I can take.
I feel like if I started asking for help, people would look at me as if I'm the one with the problem and that I'm a terrible mother, but when you look at my boys, you know that's not the case.
I love her, and I wish I could do something, but it's always said "you can't teach common sense" and believe me, I wish there was a way.
Let it me known, this is not a new behaviour problem that has come up in the past year or two...sits is an issue with her since she was very small.
To be honest, I can't wait until she's old enough to legally kick out of my house (6 more years where I am), or she chooses to run away, I don't think I would care to look for her. Which ever comes first. I can't stand living with her anymore.
I feel like I should be ashamed of how I feel. I feel like I've failed her. Obviously looking at my boys, I have not failed as a parent. But I just don't know what other options there are for her or me. I'm afraid of counselling, because I dont want to be looked at as a monster.
This morning, my 10 year old daughter had another fight, and I said some pretty nasty things.
I had my daughter when I was 17. I've been with her dad for close to 12 years now, and we have two boys, almost 8 and almost 4. My daughter was diagnosed when she was 5 with severe, classic ADHD, and cannot function as a person without medication.
I've never been able to have a bond with her because of the behavioural problems she has. Blatantly disrespecting rules, going around home doing whatever it is she wants, regardless of what anybody has said against it, and regardless of consequences. She is aware of right and wrong, but it's like she doesn't care.
I know it's not how I've raised her, because I see her two younger brothers as functioning children and following rules, and just all around good kids, and then I look at her behaviour, and it's like I've failed as a parent with her.
This morning, it was about simple things. She is not aloud anything but breakfast food in the ring ; cereal, waffles, toast etc., and there she goes eating a 3/4 of a bag of gummy worms. We have an elf on the shelf come to our house, and I did something fun last night and toilet papered the whole tree. Well she didn't like it, and took everything down before her brothers could see it.
These are very small instances. she things everything's a game for her. She can't be within 3 feet of her brothers without causing fights. She can't play with them without having her brothers scream at her. I can't have food in the house without her eating it all, or wasting it. I can't leave her alone for two minutes because she will destroy something even though she knows right from wrong. She makes her 3, almost 4 year old brother look like he knows right from wrong, and my almost 8 year old is literally close to a goddamn angel! It's like she completely LACKS any common sense or caring if she's doing something wrong.
I don't know how much I can't take of this. She has beaten the love out of me for her. Shes only 10, and I am terrified for her teens to come. I don't know how much more I can take.
I feel like if I started asking for help, people would look at me as if I'm the one with the problem and that I'm a terrible mother, but when you look at my boys, you know that's not the case.
I love her, and I wish I could do something, but it's always said "you can't teach common sense" and believe me, I wish there was a way.
Let it me known, this is not a new behaviour problem that has come up in the past year or two...sits is an issue with her since she was very small.
To be honest, I can't wait until she's old enough to legally kick out of my house (6 more years where I am), or she chooses to run away, I don't think I would care to look for her. Which ever comes first. I can't stand living with her anymore.
I feel like I should be ashamed of how I feel. I feel like I've failed her. Obviously looking at my boys, I have not failed as a parent. But I just don't know what other options there are for her or me. I'm afraid of counselling, because I dont want to be looked at as a monster.