I am just so mentally exhausted! I spent 2 hours trying to get all his medication in him and at 9am I took him to school with it so he would not be late. I did this one other time but I hate doing it. I was up there for 1 hour and they finally told me just to go home. He is with the nurse, his para educator, the guidance counselor and now the principal trying to get him to finish it. They suggested that I get permission from his dr. to have the nurse give him his medication daily at school in the morning to help. The thought process is him having a medical professional instead of mom doing it. I don't know if I like this idea as I "try" to keep the school out of this as much as possible because I am not thrilled with how they handle things. I hated taking him up there today but he cannot miss any more school and I had no choice. I also was not thrilled with the young nurse who went in the room 5 minutes with him and comes out to tell me I need to set up some consequences with him because he is acting up too much. She said he is not taking it seriously and he is jumping around and not sitting still. I told her, "that is perfectly NORMAL behavior for someone with ADHD who has not taken all of their medications!! (he had about 50% in him before we left the house) She just said, "well he needs to be given consequences or he will never take it." Can you say clueless!!! She is not the one who is normally there thankfully but I did tell her that we have tried consequences and I rattled off that he was not allowed to the go anywhere last week on break, lost the TV for 5 days, lost toys and IT DOES NOT MATTER!! At that point I walked away from her and went back with the others trying to help. She also did not understand that she cannot leave him alone in the room with it because he will dump it out. As I said, thankfully she is not the normal one there and his normal nurse has a perfect personality to deal with him and I love her! This little thing was clueless!!
We are also worried because he is having some really negative thoughts the last few days that were not happening before while on the medication. Every evening he is telling us he is stupid, worthless, a dummy, horrible person and does not deserve to have anything, ect, ect. This is new for us. He is also hitting him self in the head telling us his head is making him act like this and he starts back up again on how stupid he is and so forth. Him blaming his head is not new as he is acutely aware that he has challenges and has always said his cannot control his actions because his head keeps him from changing his behavior. What is new is hitting himself in the head and calling himself dumb and so forth. He has also had a couple violent outbursts this week too. I am concerned that 3 weeks in to taking the vyvanse his reaction to it is now turning very negative. This was not happening the first 2 weeks and is a complete change for him. He is extremely depressed and tearful in the evening all week with us. He started doing some of it at school yesterday too which concerns me even more. Of course while I was sitting there with the guidance counselor and she was telling me about it happening there yesterday I told her it is worse at home and new for him. She said, "it is not new!" This is exactly how he acted before the medications when we wanted you to put him in the hospital. Yeah, ok! I guess the 3 doctors who disagreed with you are all wrong! I told her then why did none of this happen when he was at the school at the acute partial hospitalization program??? When he was monitored by professionals THE ENTIRE SCHOOL DAY!! I will tell you why! Because YOU kept asking him how he felt and to draw it for you EVERY DAY!! Even our counselor who sees him at school that has a contract with the school says that she thinks they were leading him to draw those things and say those things. What he is saying now is different and happening while ON the medication while before on the medication he did not get depressed at all. She would not even consider that it could be the medication. Whatever!! Hopefully when I hear from his counselor today she can let them know this is new and a concern for us. I really hate this guidance counselor and I hate bringing them in on anything. I hated her being apart of the medication this am but I had no choice. She thinks she KNOWS him because he sits in her office and draws pictures of his feelings. I asked her if he had been saying this stuff or drawing these pics the last 2 weeks and she said no. BINGO!! Unfortunately he likes her too.
So I left with the principal taking him into her office to try to get him to take it. I honestly was about to lose it crying at that point so I did not fight them and left. I really needed a sanity break and I was afraid I would start crying in front of them due to my concern and frustration with him. So I went and cried in the car on the way home. I will say he drank about 50% of his medication before I took him to school and it should have kicked in to where he would be thinking more rationally...but instead it was not working at all and as I left he started talking about how stupid he is for not taking it and getting down on himself. I will say we never say those words to him about taking it so this is not something he has heard from us. Something is not "clicking" with him with this medication any more. WE see the dr on Monday.
Would you consider letting the nurse give it to him daily?? (only if the normal nurse is there) I don't like the idea. If I do keep doing it at home what do I do when it is 8:50 and school starts at 9am and it is not taken??? I really don't want to take him up there like that any more. I will certainly let his psychiatrist know all this and see if we can find a solution. I am also going to push to try a different medication with all the knew behaviors. I have 1 month before I can get more testing done on him to find out if there are other things going on too. (that will be when our new insurance starts that will pay for neuropsychologist, Occupational Therapist (OT) and whatever else is needed...I am calling today to get appts set up)
I am just so mentally drained and it is all starting to really affect me in a negative way. My husband works every day and is at a new job so I cannot pull him out of work to help right now. He tries to help in the evening but he does not have very much patience to deal with this stuff....though he is trying and getting better. He was REALLY against medications when this first started in August but he has since realized they are necessary. I just need to keep myself sane while trying to help my son but it is getting really hard....
We are also worried because he is having some really negative thoughts the last few days that were not happening before while on the medication. Every evening he is telling us he is stupid, worthless, a dummy, horrible person and does not deserve to have anything, ect, ect. This is new for us. He is also hitting him self in the head telling us his head is making him act like this and he starts back up again on how stupid he is and so forth. Him blaming his head is not new as he is acutely aware that he has challenges and has always said his cannot control his actions because his head keeps him from changing his behavior. What is new is hitting himself in the head and calling himself dumb and so forth. He has also had a couple violent outbursts this week too. I am concerned that 3 weeks in to taking the vyvanse his reaction to it is now turning very negative. This was not happening the first 2 weeks and is a complete change for him. He is extremely depressed and tearful in the evening all week with us. He started doing some of it at school yesterday too which concerns me even more. Of course while I was sitting there with the guidance counselor and she was telling me about it happening there yesterday I told her it is worse at home and new for him. She said, "it is not new!" This is exactly how he acted before the medications when we wanted you to put him in the hospital. Yeah, ok! I guess the 3 doctors who disagreed with you are all wrong! I told her then why did none of this happen when he was at the school at the acute partial hospitalization program??? When he was monitored by professionals THE ENTIRE SCHOOL DAY!! I will tell you why! Because YOU kept asking him how he felt and to draw it for you EVERY DAY!! Even our counselor who sees him at school that has a contract with the school says that she thinks they were leading him to draw those things and say those things. What he is saying now is different and happening while ON the medication while before on the medication he did not get depressed at all. She would not even consider that it could be the medication. Whatever!! Hopefully when I hear from his counselor today she can let them know this is new and a concern for us. I really hate this guidance counselor and I hate bringing them in on anything. I hated her being apart of the medication this am but I had no choice. She thinks she KNOWS him because he sits in her office and draws pictures of his feelings. I asked her if he had been saying this stuff or drawing these pics the last 2 weeks and she said no. BINGO!! Unfortunately he likes her too.
So I left with the principal taking him into her office to try to get him to take it. I honestly was about to lose it crying at that point so I did not fight them and left. I really needed a sanity break and I was afraid I would start crying in front of them due to my concern and frustration with him. So I went and cried in the car on the way home. I will say he drank about 50% of his medication before I took him to school and it should have kicked in to where he would be thinking more rationally...but instead it was not working at all and as I left he started talking about how stupid he is for not taking it and getting down on himself. I will say we never say those words to him about taking it so this is not something he has heard from us. Something is not "clicking" with him with this medication any more. WE see the dr on Monday.
Would you consider letting the nurse give it to him daily?? (only if the normal nurse is there) I don't like the idea. If I do keep doing it at home what do I do when it is 8:50 and school starts at 9am and it is not taken??? I really don't want to take him up there like that any more. I will certainly let his psychiatrist know all this and see if we can find a solution. I am also going to push to try a different medication with all the knew behaviors. I have 1 month before I can get more testing done on him to find out if there are other things going on too. (that will be when our new insurance starts that will pay for neuropsychologist, Occupational Therapist (OT) and whatever else is needed...I am calling today to get appts set up)
I am just so mentally drained and it is all starting to really affect me in a negative way. My husband works every day and is at a new job so I cannot pull him out of work to help right now. He tries to help in the evening but he does not have very much patience to deal with this stuff....though he is trying and getting better. He was REALLY against medications when this first started in August but he has since realized they are necessary. I just need to keep myself sane while trying to help my son but it is getting really hard....
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