Psychiatric Disorder? Hmmm.

[Nomad]

I too sometimes wonder about the concept of a "character" disorder...but I also see with my father that there are many other factors involved, including a natural tendency, combined with extreme stress in childhood....as well as other factors. When he was a young man, I had some sympathy for him, but really don't anymore.

I rarely see or hear from him, with the exception of when he needs something from me. Ironically, I have told him that should he ever have a big problem (now that he is getting older...although I didn't say that specifically) not to hesitate to call me and I would do my best to help him. I am disengaged...however. since I am an only child, I feel a certain obligation to attend to his basic health needs since he is now a senior citizen.

He does not say these kinds of things to me and never has ....it almost seems backward considering I am the child and he has grandchildren who he has never helped in any way, shape or form. This is how it has always been: what can others do for him, he doesn't have to or need to help others and when he has problems...it's the other guy's fault.

 

[emotionallybankrupt]

Not that your letter sounds like you are, but as time goes by it's easy for doubts to creep in.

Yes, I know myself well enough to know that will happen, probably the closer we get to the holidays. Even though I know in my heart I'm doing the right thing, I know it will get harder for me to hold my position the closer we get to Christmas. I guess I'm trying to pump myself up now to try to keep myself more resolved as time goes on.

Thanks for the validation. I'm sure I'll be re-reading (and re-reading...) to try to keep myself from buckling.

I could absolutely wring her neck, but I also love her so and wish I could just hug her up and rock her like I used to do.