The Trip Down "Denial River" Continues...

[InsaneCdn]

"Filling in the gaps" is a very common symptom that goes with all sorts of dxes... including medical.

But... knowing what it's like to live with a person with Auditory Processing Disorders (APD), and living with hearing loss myself... It really isn't hard to imagine how someone with other challenges can REALLY get off track fast. I mean... I can be 10 conversations away from the rest of the "table", in about... 10 sentences. And I can't even explain how I got there - things move too fast, my brain moves at same speed, but... in a different direction. Sometimes it's hilarious. Sometimes? I'd rather crawl under the table. But I "know" what reality is, once I "hear" the right words and the right context.

I used to be much more needing to fill in the gaps BEFORE my hearing loss. I just didn't get the implied context of the conversation, and "implied" my own context, and... was accused of all sorts of lies and fabrications that really were not deliberate. Life IS interesting.

 

[Bunny]

Daisy, just out of curiosity, what does difficult child plan to do after graduation?

 

[DaisyFace]

Daisy, just out of curiosity, what does difficult child plan to do after graduation?

The plan is to increase her hours at her job to full-time and MOVE OUT! (Woot! Woot!)

 

[TerryJ2]

he has such difficulty understanding life that he makes up stuff to fill in the gaps in his comprehension

Good point, JJJ.

 

[DaisyFace]

"Filling in the gaps" is a very common symptom that goes with all sorts of dxes... including medical.

I used to be much more needing to fill in the gaps BEFORE my hearing loss. I just didn't get the implied context of the conversation, and "implied" my own context, and... was accused of all sorts of lies and fabrications that really were not deliberate. Life IS interesting.

So how do you fix that? Over the years, if we heard something strange from difficult child and were able to figure out what she had "mis-heard", we've been able to figure it out for her.

How does difficult child learn to figure out things for herself?

 

[busywend]

I still struggle with this one myself. difficult child has a ticket to may, for missing court, and still has not paid it. I have tried to ask about it multiple times, each time getting a different reason why she does not have to pay it yet. I just scratch my head and tell her she can and will lose her license, which means her job is going to be gone, too. Sigh....natural consequences I guess.

 

[pasajes4]

She will learn when she has to do it herself and falls on her face many times. Some people never learn and many of those don't have mental issues.

 

[InsaneCdn]

So how do you fix that? Over the years, if we heard something strange from difficult child and were able to figure out what she had "mis-heard", we've been able to figure it out for her.

How does difficult child learn to figure out things for herself?

Well... in my case? maturity.
That magic "age 25" stuff.
It slowly got better... success helped, other things that improved self-esteem helped.
No rocket science.

I still have to watch it, though... the self-esteem issues never really go away, and when I'm in a corner... first impulse is to embellish... and I know it doesn't work, but I really have to watch myself.

 

[welcometowitsend]

DF - Wow, wow, wow. Such a strange fantasy world. Do you think that is part of her Personality Disorder? I guess it must be.

And again, this sounds so much like my difficult child. He did the exact same thing with a huge drama project at school. Did none of the work, told everyone he had, didn't show up at the last minute and his poor group was in tears because this was a huge part of their grade. Then showed up the next day like he was the star of the class, joking around, happy, carrying on like he had done nothing wrong. And when my cousin invited him to her sons birthday party he took the invite as a request for his expert services as a musician. He told me he was to bring his guitar and be the 'entertainment'. He doesn't know a single kids song.

I agree with you in letting her face the 'music' when the time comes. I feel bad for the teacher and the other students involved but hopefully your difficult child will learn something from it.