Vent!

[Hound dog]

*Warning* This is another Pharm vent. So if you're sick of hearing me carry on about Pharm, click out now and save yourselves.

I *thought* I was doing better. I wasn't, not really. I suppose one decent test grade......and the one great grade on the quiz.......doesn't really mean that I've caught on. Cuz I haven't.

I am not kidding nor exaggerating when I say I'm spending 6-8 hrs a day on pharm. On the weekends it is more like 12-14. And it is getting me NOWHERE! husband drills me. Students go over it with me.

I clearly cannot figure out what I'm doing wrong. So I've attempted to modify my methods. I've tried following the instructors advice. I've tried what has worked for me before. I've even tried what worked for me 30 yrs ago.

Every single week it seems like the instructor magically manages to put into questions things that I've either not spotted in the chapter as being significant.....or come up with some mystical facts that other students appear to have knowledge of that I don't. Maybe it's just zipping over my head?? I dunno.

Like today's exam.......I felt like I knew this material better than any chapter before it. I was dedicated to my study. I was focused. I was remembering stuff like never before and actually keeping things straight. husband drilled me and was impressed. (he's getting pretty good at it now) I was fairly confident. But I wasn't about to let myself feel over confident. So I went over the material before bed last night and yet again this morning. I went over it again at noon just to keep it fresh.

I was not nervous over the test.

I knew by the time I turned the first page I was in trouble. I didn't have a clue where most of the **** she was asking was coming from. I'll give you an example. Sulfonamides are your folic acid inhibitors (antibiotics). I knew that. But the question asked what vitamin we'd give to a patient taking a sulfonimide medication. First off, I recalled no where in the entire chapter that it said to give a vitamin for any of the antibiotics. And I'd been over the chapter with a fine toothed comb. I did recall that there are minerals that you don't take with certain ones...... So I chose the encourage the patient to eat a well balanced diet answer. The correct answer was to give them folic acid. The other students knew this, it was no apparent suprise to them. So? When I got home and looked it up.......I swear to you it is no where to be found to give a patient taking sulfonamide's folic acid. grrrr! It wasn't in her lecture nor her power point either because I did both of those this time.

I will go over the chapter again tomorrow to look for it. I'm far too livid tonight, so perhaps I missed it. But the other students are not mind readers, so it has to state it somewhere, somehow that would have given them that impression.

This has been what's been happening, folks and I just don't know how to fight it.

I barely passed last weeks exam with a 78. This week's I flunked with a 75. (and I studied twice as hard)

easy child has it in her head I'm over studying. I'm a bit unsure how you can "over study" so darn much information. But maybe she is right. I'm the irritating student who does not ever read the book, I don't pour over notes for hours on end. Example: for medication Surg and Fundementals.........I've not read a single chapter, nor did I all last quarter. Same for Patho last quarter. I read over the notes a few times and that was about it.

I'm so fed up it's not funny. I'm no genius. I'm in my opinion not even exceptionally bright, although I'm far from stupid. But I do have a "gift" for this sort of thing and usually a memory for it that I don't have (most especially after the Traumatic Brain Injury (TBI)) for other things. I'm not against hard work, or studying. I'm not lazy either.

But I am definately fed up with nearly killing myself just to continue to fail. I can barely look at the material and make the same grades I'm making at the moment. I mean c'mon, what did I waste my time putting in all that friggin effort for??

So, I'm just reading the chapters each night. No more extra notes. No more pouring over her darn lecture and power points. I'll read/listen to them once and that's it. No more putting in umteen endless hours.

If I fail, then I fail. My stomach has been killing me for 2 weeks. I'm always exhausted. I'm beginning to dread getting up and going to school each morning. And worst yet, I'm beginning to really not care.

If I do fail, I do not plan to return to the program. I'm horribly disappointed by it. I feel cheated. I feel like I just threw my money and the past 4 years away. I'm going to owe a small fortune I'm not going to be able to pay back on walmart salary.

When I came home this evening it was not pretty. Actually, I have never been so utterly frustrated and thoroughly livid since before husband and I were married. I quite literally exploded, unnerving husband and all the furbabies. Alarmed the furbabies so much that each of them tried their darndest to make Mom feel better.

I don't think at this point anything can make me feel better. So I'm going back to my normal way of doing things and maybe easy child's theory is right. Maybe I am over studying. I hope so. Because at this point it is The Chips are going to fall where ever they fall.

I'm not quitting. They'll have to flunk me out. But I am done killing myself.

I am so mad, frustrated, and bummed. I'd burst into tears except that I'd probably never stop.

 

[Hound dog]

Oh, forgot to add that the instructor told us today that we need to be studying what we're supposed to as a nurse and what we should be teaching our patients about the medications. NOTHING MORE. She of course waits until 2 wks before finals to inform us of this. Oh, and then tells us about these uber cool flashcards made by the people that put out our medication surg book (so I know they're good) that tells us exactly the sort of things she is asking us on the tests.

Then she tells us not to worry. We have 3 more tests. 2 exams and a math test PLUS the final to bring up our grades. She doesn't know the self control it took for me not to go for her throat.

Knowing you have 3 more exams when you're having serious trouble passing them each week does not cheer a person up. As for the final, I was wrong, it's not 33 percent of our grade, it's a whopping 35 percent!!! And I'm thinking, lady if you think I'm expecting that final to pull my fanny out of the fire when I can't pass the weekly tests, then you've got more than a few nails loose!!

But what I loved most is her finally telling us exactly what it is she wants us to study and about the flash cards with finals 2 wks away. Now, wasn't that so very kind?? UGH

 

[witzend]

I think that what you are saying is a possible good learning point. I would go to the teacher at some point and tell her, "I have looked over all of the chapter, all of the the course notes, all of the powerpoint, and I can't find anything about folic acid. Others seemed to have had this information at hand, and I don't understand how I missed it when it seemed plain to others. Can you please point it out to me?"

Maybe it will help you to understand the way she is preparing her tests. It might just be a different point of view that you could take when studying. It couldn't hurt...

 

[everywoman]

Daisy, I'm sorry you're having such trouble. I know that it is frustrating. Jana is taking an online computer course that is kicking her butt--not because she can't use Office 2007---but because the tests ask the most obscure questions. The thing that is hurting her the most is that the 2nd week she ran out of time (2 chapters that week and she had spent two days with a migraine) and did not turn in two assignments that do not count as grades and so the professor gave her a 0 on the entire chapters even though she made a B on both tests and the homework project that didn't count and did the other 3 assignments that did not count. She is going to see the dean if the grade effects her final average because when she read the department rules and the course syllabus it doesn't say anything about the ungraded assignments being a requirement.

 

[Wiped Out]

((((Hugs))))

 

[Hound dog]

Witz I plan to do that. Actually, since she won't be in class next week I'm going to write her a nice long email over the weekend and see if I can't figure out what my problem seems to be.

Also, husband ordered those flash cards for me. Maybe they'll be helpful too.

Some I know is because she's yanked my confidence out from under me. I 2nd guess myself, which was some of the issue with this exam. I still would've missed alot, but not enough to fail. I went back and changed my answers, something I know never to do. Because you're 1st instinct is usually right. sigh

 

[DammitJanet]

The only thing I can think of that actually jumps out at me as being how maybe other people thought of what vitamin to give is...folic acid inhibitor...give folic acid. Would seem natural logical flow.

Though I will be darned if I have ever had a doctor tell me to take folic acid when I have taken sulfa drugs!

Now Billy has to take folic acid with his methotrexate.

 

[KTMom91]

Just hugs.

 

[Hound dog]

Janet, I figured it was that sort of reasoning by the time I finally calmed down last night right before bed.

But that sort of reasoning is stupid as I've been on sulf medications many many times..........and not once did someone mention it might be a good idea if I increased folic acid in my diet or take a supplement. You're just not on the antibiotic that long usually to worry about it.

Maybe I am over thinking over studying this. My flash cards are due to arrive monday. husband paid a whopping fee to get them quickly. (although I told him not to) I'm hoping they'll help me have enough condensed info to study for the final since there is no way I have time to read all the chapters repeatedly for that exam.

I wonder if it is possible to force yourself to mellow out about something?? lol But I'm going to try to. Missing a week of school at the beginning of the quarter, then going while still quite sick the following week really thru me off stride. When it came to pharm that I was already nervous and anxious about, I panicked. And I've been functioning in panic mode the rest of the quarter. (another thing I realized last night) So I've got to use my techniques for panic attacks and attempt to talk myself out of panicking over pharm.

I did this same thing over algebra. Chemistry I started to but backed my way out of it by telling myself I could/would take it a 2nd time.

 

[busywend]

Could it be from another chapter? Look up Folic Acid in the Index to see where it says this.

 

[WhymeMom?]

Just a little tip that may or may not work for you........ when I went back for my second degree in a totally different field I felt a little behind in how I studied, and what my memory could recall........ tests terrified me because I could look at the material and forget it 20 minutes later, NOT YOUR problem by any means....... what I did was check out my instructors background...... where she went to college and if they had a website in say........ pharmecology........ there were assignments posted and in many cases..... quizzes that I could see how others were tested and in my case there were even test questions that came directly from tests posted online........ Now, you may not stumble upon this exactly, but you can see how others are studying the same material and perhaps she isn't actually trying to teach you to regurgitate book facts, but how to draw logical conclusions about drugs and their interactions. She has to get her test questions from somewhere and in all likelyhood (unless this is her first teaching job) her questions are not the first time she has asked them. If you can't find anything about her online, then check out other sites on nursing pharmecology and I would think you could get a feeling for the information you need or would be tested on.........

Yeah, I know too much to do and too late, but worth a shot and by checking info online perhaps you would find different angles of study???????????

But then again, maybe you have already done this......................... good luck with finding the key......................

 

[Hound dog]

Now that I've calmed down considerably, I realize that I have been over studying myself to death and stressing myself to the limit which in turn had me in high panic mode. I think being so deathly sick those first few weeks of the quarter threw me into a tailspin that I've just not recovered from.

So I'm forcing myself to chill out about it. I'm taking the night off. Even took husband to dinner. Which was lovely and delicious. No more over stressing. I will do for this class what I've done in my others. With one exception of reading the chapters. And that's because there is no other way to get that info since we don't have any in class teaching.

WMM that sounds like a good idea, I may look into it this weekend.

Meanwhile, I finally got to go to surgery today. HUGE morale booster. (I think the instructor sensed I was in need of one) It was an awesome experience.

I never thought I'd have to force myself to chill over pharm. lol But there it is. And I'm trying.

Thanks for the support. I'm sure you're all getting sick of hearing me whine and vent over this class. Cuz I'm sick of hearing me whine and vent over this class. lol

Hugs

 

[judi]

I'm thinking you are overstudying too. What is the class averge? Is it possible to transfer to a different teacher? Or....is ttoo late in the semester?

I feel for you.

 

[Shari]

The only advice I had, you've already figured out. That mommy gut is there for a reason!

Hugs, and good luck.

 

[Hound dog]

Judy the class average is 65 percent. Horrible, huh? And this is a class "in program" so there is no way to transfer to another teacher.

I'm still passing, barely. And I'll do my best to hold onto it. But no more over studying. No more trying to learn every detail. I don't normally do that, so doing it for pharm is silly. You want the important high points, the rest can be looked up later when you need it. Too bad it took me so long to get that. I'm hoping the flash cards will help me brush up on past chapters I didn't do so well in.

 

[donna723]

Lisa, I think you've got the right idea. You could very well be 'over-studying'. Besides recovering from your illness, you're stressing over it and probably not getting enough sleep if you're studying that much.

I keep remembering my daughter going through that part in nursing school and it was very stressful for them, but of course, they had the advantage of having classroom instruction! I can't believe they just pretty much expect you to learn it on your own like that! Would it help if you worked with another student? Allison stayed with a classmate the week before their exams and they studied together and drilled each other and used the flash cards. They may not have ace'd it but they both passed.

You know, if one or two people in a class are failing, that's understandable and it's probably their own fault. But if the whole class average is below failing like that, then there's something very wrong with the program, the instructor, the way it's being taught (or rather, not taught)! I'm surprised that something hasn't been done about it before now!

 

[Hound dog]

Those running the program know what is going on. Students as whole classes have gone and made complaints, usually after graduation so as not to make an enemy. I'm talking multiple classes here for the past several years. It's not all the instructor's fault. And although I rag on her quite a bit, I realize that. The poor woman has been dumped on and there hasn't been much she could do about it. No one else wanted to teach it and she was the low man and got stuck with it. For both the PN and RN programs, which means she has 3-5 pharm classes going at the same time at different levels. This on top of Pathology which has the same thing going on.

Currently the entire program is being re-vamped. And honestly, I think this is one of the reasons. Pharm instructor is an awesome clinical instructor to hear tell via all her clinical students. Heck, she was ok for patho too. (I've had harder) But they've literally dumped this on her when she also works 20 hrs a week as a NP on top of it. Maybe if some of the load was shared by another instructor she'd be much better........but we won't know because none of the changes they're making will take effect until next fall.

Tonight I simply read all 5 of this weeks chapters and highlighted points I felt were important to draw my attention to. Tomorrow I'll re-read them and listen to her powepoint/lecture while having my morning coffee. Much more relaxed about it. And I noticed alot of things I hadn't noticed when I was trying to cram other chapters into my brain. 5 chapters seem horrid, but they're small ones, so it's not so bad.

I do study with some of the other students. And it helps some, but I can't do it too much or it throws me. I'm not much of a group study person, never have been. I get distracted that way. lol