difficult child has now sold (ebay) all the gifts he received from us last year...

[Signorina]

Oh Susie - you didn't upset me. Not in the slightest. I think you are terrific.

You did give me food for thought...and I really thought about it and that's why I answered the way I did. I'll admit, that I was obsessed in the first two weeks or so after difficult child took off. But I've worked past that -- at times it's been REALLY HARD -- and I am in an OK place right now and have been for a few months.

I am just concerned that the balance I've found is about to get up-ended when difficult child returns on Saturday. And "IF" he is at the tipping point, I want to make sure I get my part right. Letting things unfold is my stumbling block.

You know when you feel a pimple brewing and you try to pop it way before it's ready and you end up with a big ol scabby red thing that lasts way longer than the pimple would have? That's how I treat dilemmas sometimes...I try to bring them to a head and pop em before they are ready...and end up with a bigger problem. On the bright side, it's only sometimes now - used to be all the time!

LOL

 

[Signorina]

Nancy - about the Xbox -I think it's great that you hid it.

Your post kind of illustrates why I am secretly a little happy that difficult child sold his. It seems that the "stoners" play A LOT of X-Box - even against each other online while they smoke. (which I had not realized until my baptism by fire Fall 2011) I am secretly a tad hopeful that his decision to get rid of his X-Box is a move in the right direction.

difficult child has always been that kind of kid - takes after my H. When H needs to shake things up at work - get more motivated - the FIRST thing he does is rearrange his office. It's like a restart, I guess (H is a sales rep) Similarly, when difficult child wants to turn over a new leaf (scholastically in the past), he clears his room completely of clutter, gets rid of any distractions and leaves some visual clues of what he is trying to accomplish (a HS varsity football poster when he was in jr high, a Chart of Elements when he was starting college). Ya - I know it's probably about needing the money, but I won't weep that it's gone - Know what I mean??

 

[Nancy]

I'm a lot like you Sig, I have a tendency to bring things to a head instead of letting them evolve. I had to learn to supress that and what I have found is sometimes they resolve themselves on their own. But I do have to keep telling myself to wait and see, it's hard sometimes.

Nancy

 

[toughlovin]

LOL I am like this too... when something is bothering or worrying me I want to deal with it NOW.... I don't like waiting to see what will happen. I have had to learn sometimes to sit back and wait but I find that really hard to do.

TL