Littleboylost
Long road but the path ahead holds hope.
I am very exhausted and sad over the behaviour of my brother who is a coexecutor to my Mother's estate with me
The will and estate is very simple it is a small amount of cash to be devided up amongst 8 beneficiaries.
My brother insists on creating problems where there are none and I have tried to be patient and supportive while attempting to progress things forward.
Family relations are strained from past incidence and similar behavior from my brother. I I am facing the same behavioral issues from my brother. None of my siblings will speak to my brother.
This has left me to be the liaison of communication to the family. Any requests for information from my sisters who were past POAs for my mother have been met to the best of there abilities. My brother is insistent that they were misappropriating funds and lays many suspcions and claims of such behavior to other family members as well.
A bit of back story. My sister was taking advantage of my father before his death. She was placed under a court order to cease all actions and activities with my Father and his funds. Befor an investigation could proceed my father passed away. One other brother was found to be forging cheques as well. This brother is not a beneficiary of my mother. All of these issues were managed and considered closed out with my father's estate. Bar the ongoing investigation against my sister.
My sister is being investigated for elder abuse. During the course of these proceedings my brother became aggressive and acusatory and inappropriate to many family members. It caused such strife that the family estate lawyer refused to represent my mother's estate moving forward.
My sisters acting as POAs for my mother did a great job caring for my mother and selling the family home and simplifying the estate. My brother is determine to find fault with all that they have done where there is none. His rantings became unbearable and he then started making acusations towards me and acting in a manner that was delaying the process.
There is a lot of family discourse and past history that makes any unified decision difficult. I had to approach my family and explain the course of events that had transpired. I expressed I was not only concerned for the timely processing of the estate, but was also concerned for my brothers MH and state of mind. He had sent numerous inappropriate messages out and told the estate lawyer to cease all activity on the estate.
I had no other course of action than to suggest we petition to remove him from the estate as coexecutor. The family agreed unanimously which is very rare.
I had to inform the estate lawyer and as per rule of law they are not able to represent me with the family , or my brother. I am now in the process of seeking out a new law firm, yet again.
I have sent a notice to my brother and at least his rantings and accusations have ceased. They were non stop multiple e mails texts and phone calls. He was furious that I would not support his claims of wrong doing by other family members. He saw his position as executor and a position of power and not of duty. I simply couldn't take any more.
Clearly he is not pleased with this turn of events. He has indicated he is retaining counsel. I am going to have to see if he is liable for the cost of his counsel or whether he will have to pay those costs himself.
No other family member wishes to be coexecutor with me (no surprise). They are happy if I take care of things myself.
If I am successful in removing my brother as coexecutor I will still have to contend with him as bennificary to the estate.
Because of the past issues we need to clear the accounts and have the will pass probate. So all in all once that process occurs and there are no issues regarding the validity of the will. It is a matter of clearing debt and paying out what is left equally to the 8 beneficiaries.
I have to carry on to finalize my mother's terminal taxes. Pass the accounts and pass the will through probate. Sigh a huge Pile of work.
After all of this grief another brother contacted me to indicate that my coexecutor brother had been hospitozed some time ago and was diagnosed with a mental illness. He has since refused to take medication for this issue. Knowing this makes me understand the inappropriate behavior more clearly now.
This too shall pass, but really why me!
My sister indicated to me that my mother had insisted that she no longer wanted my brother as executor to her will. They felt she did not have capacity due to her alszheimers so do not act upon this change. They felt all of the issues had been managed and contained with my father death and estate. They truest never felt my brother would continue on as he has.
Just a vent and a rant. As if I didn't have enough to deal with already.
The will and estate is very simple it is a small amount of cash to be devided up amongst 8 beneficiaries.
My brother insists on creating problems where there are none and I have tried to be patient and supportive while attempting to progress things forward.
Family relations are strained from past incidence and similar behavior from my brother. I I am facing the same behavioral issues from my brother. None of my siblings will speak to my brother.
This has left me to be the liaison of communication to the family. Any requests for information from my sisters who were past POAs for my mother have been met to the best of there abilities. My brother is insistent that they were misappropriating funds and lays many suspcions and claims of such behavior to other family members as well.
A bit of back story. My sister was taking advantage of my father before his death. She was placed under a court order to cease all actions and activities with my Father and his funds. Befor an investigation could proceed my father passed away. One other brother was found to be forging cheques as well. This brother is not a beneficiary of my mother. All of these issues were managed and considered closed out with my father's estate. Bar the ongoing investigation against my sister.
My sister is being investigated for elder abuse. During the course of these proceedings my brother became aggressive and acusatory and inappropriate to many family members. It caused such strife that the family estate lawyer refused to represent my mother's estate moving forward.
My sisters acting as POAs for my mother did a great job caring for my mother and selling the family home and simplifying the estate. My brother is determine to find fault with all that they have done where there is none. His rantings became unbearable and he then started making acusations towards me and acting in a manner that was delaying the process.
There is a lot of family discourse and past history that makes any unified decision difficult. I had to approach my family and explain the course of events that had transpired. I expressed I was not only concerned for the timely processing of the estate, but was also concerned for my brothers MH and state of mind. He had sent numerous inappropriate messages out and told the estate lawyer to cease all activity on the estate.
I had no other course of action than to suggest we petition to remove him from the estate as coexecutor. The family agreed unanimously which is very rare.
I had to inform the estate lawyer and as per rule of law they are not able to represent me with the family , or my brother. I am now in the process of seeking out a new law firm, yet again.
I have sent a notice to my brother and at least his rantings and accusations have ceased. They were non stop multiple e mails texts and phone calls. He was furious that I would not support his claims of wrong doing by other family members. He saw his position as executor and a position of power and not of duty. I simply couldn't take any more.
Clearly he is not pleased with this turn of events. He has indicated he is retaining counsel. I am going to have to see if he is liable for the cost of his counsel or whether he will have to pay those costs himself.
No other family member wishes to be coexecutor with me (no surprise). They are happy if I take care of things myself.
If I am successful in removing my brother as coexecutor I will still have to contend with him as bennificary to the estate.
Because of the past issues we need to clear the accounts and have the will pass probate. So all in all once that process occurs and there are no issues regarding the validity of the will. It is a matter of clearing debt and paying out what is left equally to the 8 beneficiaries.
I have to carry on to finalize my mother's terminal taxes. Pass the accounts and pass the will through probate. Sigh a huge Pile of work.
After all of this grief another brother contacted me to indicate that my coexecutor brother had been hospitozed some time ago and was diagnosed with a mental illness. He has since refused to take medication for this issue. Knowing this makes me understand the inappropriate behavior more clearly now.
This too shall pass, but really why me!
My sister indicated to me that my mother had insisted that she no longer wanted my brother as executor to her will. They felt she did not have capacity due to her alszheimers so do not act upon this change. They felt all of the issues had been managed and contained with my father death and estate. They truest never felt my brother would continue on as he has.
Just a vent and a rant. As if I didn't have enough to deal with already.
