Gaslighting or Our Fault?

[RN0441]

I have been feeling vulnerable myself. My friend texted me today:

You are stronger than this my friend. Do not allow something that ISN'T YOUR JOURNEY and OUT OF YOUR CONTROL shatter your confidence. This isn't your journey. Yours son is an adult.

She has two great kids but what wonderful insight!

That helped me. Maybe it will help someone here too!

 

[Ironbutterfly]

Got to admit, it seems like the best thing that happened was when my son's license expired and he couldn't get another ID in Colorado since he didn't have an address. That meant he couldn't pick up moneygrams or Western Union and I couldn't send him any money or buy him anything for in-store pickup. He was well and truly cut off. After a while, a weight lifted off my shoulders too. He didn't call and ask anymore. And guess what? He didn't die! As a matter of fact, he now has a job and a place to live. So...I guess this "let them figure it out" thing, works.

Big Hugs Albie. We're all with you!

Just FYI- people can get western union money without an ID- all you need to do is have a "test question" which is four words- and give the answer when filling out the wire to send money. The person receiving the $$ has to know the answer to the test question. Son received $$ for long time via this when he had no ID.

 

[Lil]

Just FYI- people can get western union money without an ID- all you need to do is have a "test question" which is four words- and give the answer when filling out the wire to send money. The person receiving the $$ has to know the answer to the test question. Son received $$ for long time via this when he had no ID.

I'm glad I didn't know that when it mattered.

 

[so ready to live]

That's funny Lil. When I told my husband about western union without an ID, he said I hope I don't need to ever know that! There are so many things we know that we wish we didn't, aren't there? What a long road.

 

[Littleboylost]

That's funny Lil. When I told my husband about western union without an ID, he said I hope I don't need to ever know that! There are so many things we know that we wish we didn't, aren't there? What a long road.

I said just today it takes a village ....I wish I was in another village though. Ugh!

 

[DoneDad]

A village with no idiots!

 

[litbitblack]

I wouldn't ask him if he was up to date on his payments. I started not asking and it was nice not to have the conversation where she asks me for money lol