He broke a window

[writestuff]

Haven't been on the board regularly in a while, but I'm having a round night of it myself with difficult child 2, and saw your post. It reminds me a *lot* of difficult child 1 when he was 11, which was just an awful, awful year for him. Fortunately, we were eventually able to find a medication combo that seems to help--he's never been diagnosed with bipolar, but his main medication is Abilify, and it really helps, which makes you go "hmmm."

But I also think, especially in retrospect, that that year was so rough with him due to puberty hitting hard and early (his voice dropped like a stone when he was 11.5, +acne and oily hair and stuff, and now having just turned 13 he's got full sideburns and is sprouting a new whisker on his chin every day, it seems). So I believe he may have ramped up from his always-difficult nature into awfulness by a hormonal overload, and after things evened out a bit more he also evened out.

 

[TerryJ2]

Writestuff, I agree, he's at that age. By the end of summer, he'll be shaving. Scary thought!

 

[totoro]

Nothing really to add Terry, I am just catching up from my own "Drama" I just wanted you to know that I was thinking of you... I know how hard and scary it is when they are out of control... but with an older boy who might be hitting puberty, YIKES!!! On top of everything else. I think he needs something more as well...

 

[TerryJ2]

Hi all, we talked a bit and he said he knew that it hurt me to say he wanted to move in with-his bmom and he was sorry. He was just angry.
Also, today, he opened my box of Dove Bars, which we specifically told him not to do, since he's allergic to milk. I do not buy ice cream any more because he simply cannot control himself, but husband bought them for me for Mother's Day. So I confronted difficult child quietly and told him he knew he was not supposed to take any, that they were specifically for me, and why did he do it?
He shrugged his shoulders and said, "I don't know." At any rate, I told him to write 50 X, "I am sorry for stealing your Dove Bars." He wrote, "I am sorry for taking you're Dove bars." I did not correct the spelling or word choice. I'm going to tape the written page over the top of the box in the freezer.
He just doesn't get boundaries and impulse control. It's so tiring.
But husband has bought these for me b4 and I haven't gotten a single one and it's partly his fault for continually buying things difficult child can't handle. He's just not mature enough yet.
Training a difficult child is training the entire family.
Sigh.

 

[witzend]

I have to say that the stories the adoptive parents (and g'parents) tell here about how some of the kids have been abandoned or forgotten by bio-parents just breaks my heart.

I just want to say that you are all heroes to me. You have much more strength than I ever could. Your children are blessed to have you, and so brave to try to understand something so unfathomable at such a young age.

{{{{{{{{{{Big hugs}}}}}}}}}}} to all of you.