Hurts so much

[Worndown68]

This is the first thing and exactly what I needed to read at this very moment today! Thank you! He's homeless with only the clothes on his back after just getting out of jail, again. I told him go to rehab, again. Feeling it's harsh but it's his choice. He has many programs he could use to change his path. I'm not here to enable and I do not have to accept him as he is. Especially without any accountability and blaming me for where he is. I lashed out with things I probably should not have said but feel pushed way past my limit. I'm just so sick of it. Same thing, broken record, over and over and over again. If you're not going to listen then stop calling me. I cannot take the stress of it any longer. I truly cannot. Told him this is why I went no contact for three years prior to this. It's hard for me to not help too. I want to help him so bad but feels useless. Either way, we both suffer for it. Thank you for your encouragement. I really did need this today LetGo.

That sounds like good news indeed. Not the broken shoulder but the seizures that scared him. I hope it all continues, I have a 23yr old granddaughter who has been sober for 500+ days and I am so thankful and proud her. She saw her life going downhill and didn’t want to be like her mother and she started at AA and now she has a completely sober friendship group and has been working since college
I try to hold on to that when I low, thinking about my daughter. The young ones seem to be see the danger of alcohol, neither of her siblings have touched it thank goodness.

 

[Worndown68]

This is the first thing and exactly what I needed to read at this very moment today! Thank you! He's homeless with only the clothes on his back after just getting out of jail, again. I told him go to rehab, again. Feeling it's harsh but it's his choice. He has many programs he could use to change his path. I'm not here to enable and I do not have to accept him as he is. Especially without any accountability and blaming me for where he is. I lashed out with things I probably should not have said but feel pushed way past my limit. I'm just so sick of it. Same thing, broken record, over and over and over again. If you're not going to listen then stop calling me. I cannot take the stress of it any longer. I truly cannot. Told him this is why I went no contact for three years prior to this. It's hard for me to not help too. I want to help him so bad but feels useless. Either way, we both suffer for it. Thank you for your encouragement. I really did need this today LetGo.

Sending you a big hug, you need it, just as we all do here. Tonight I was thinking that I need to write a letter to my 52 year old daughters to read when I have passed, because we are no contact and I don’t see it ever changing in my lifetime. It is heartbreaking

 

[LetGo]

MommaTried24, You're welcome! You are so right about the rub when you said "Either way, we both suffer for it." I am choosing not to suffer. Sometimes that feels selfish, most of the time it feels like just what I should do and so I continue on. My "help" really will not change anything. We have to take care of ourselves. Hugs.

 

[LetGo]

Sending you a big hug, you need it, just as we all do here. Tonight I was thinking that I need to write a letter to my 52 year old daughters to read when I have passed, because we are no contact and I don’t see it ever changing in my lifetime. It is heartbreaking

Worndown68, It might help you to write a letter for them to have when you pass. It could help for you to get everything "out". If you do it, let us know how it goes. Hugs

 

[Kat9]

He hasn’t been sober very long. I wouldn’t pressure him about jobs or anything. If his mother doesn’t enable him too much he might begin to explore possibilities. Marijuana kills a persons ambition. It affects the brain that way. It sometimes takes two years for the effects of drugs to leave the brain. That doesn’t mean he won’t find his way for two whole years. But there will be possible some depression etc from coming off substances. Marijuana is way potent today than old hippie days and I think they even add synthetic chemicals to It. I’m shocked at the skunk smell I smell everywhere. Even though there was skunk weed in the 70’s it had a very faint more natural smell. I don’t know what this mess is that is so darn stinky that I can smell it when people have their car windoes rolled up and I’m a couple of car spaces away. I grew up in hippie era and what I see today is shocking to me. I absolutely ashore it.