S
scared
Guest
I just found this board and really need some advice. If you can bear with me through some of the murky backround details, ( I will try to be brief) I would be forever grateful for any input and help anyone can offfer!
I married my husband a litle over 3 years ago. He had 3 kids from his first marriage. He has custody of them because his ex-wife walked out on him and the kids for another man. When I met them, the kids had a few problems, but they seemed to be normal problems that most kids being raised by a single father and dealing with a divorce would have.
We got married, and I became a stay at home mom mom in order to eliminate a HUGE daycare bill. The kids at the time were 9 (girl), 5(boy), and 4(girl).
Fast forward to March of 2008. My husband and I had a baby girl together and I couldnt be happier. She is everything I could have ever dreamed of. His kids love her and think of her as their sister. We never refer to anyone as half or step...unless we legally have to.
The Two middle kids problems were continuing to get worse and worse. In July of 2009, My husbands youngest daughter was admitted to a residentail facility to deal with ADD and ODD issues. She came home in October and seemed to be making some progress. While she was gone, her brother went sliding down hill in a BIG way. He has been on all kinds of medications, and as of today, there are no other medications we can turn to, and no higher doses. He has severe ADHD and conduct disorder. While on the medicine for ADHD, is is still 94% from standard deviation. That is a lot of loose ends for being on medicine. His daughter is on Conccerta 54mg and Respiradal.
I myself have medical problems and am at my wits ends trying to help these children. My marriage (even without the strains of special needs kids) is rocky at best. My husband dosent like to admit that his kids problems are as severe as the doctors have told us they are.
My question is this.... I am scared for my daughter. She is my main concern. My stepkids have a mother. They do see her, and she wants to be more active in their lives. My daughter only has a 50% chance of inheriting the genitics that cause some of these problems, but enviornment can play a factor too. I am also worried for her safety. She has not 1 but 2 people to worrry about in her home.
If you were in my situation, would you take your child and leave, or would you stay and do all you could and hope for the best.
I hope I do not sound like a horrible person. I truly love these kids, but as a mother, I have to put my own daughters well being and happiness in the forefront of my mind above that of all others. I just really need some guidance from others in the same kind of situation as me I guess.
Thank you so much for bearing with me, and for any help you might have to offer!
I married my husband a litle over 3 years ago. He had 3 kids from his first marriage. He has custody of them because his ex-wife walked out on him and the kids for another man. When I met them, the kids had a few problems, but they seemed to be normal problems that most kids being raised by a single father and dealing with a divorce would have.
We got married, and I became a stay at home mom mom in order to eliminate a HUGE daycare bill. The kids at the time were 9 (girl), 5(boy), and 4(girl).
Fast forward to March of 2008. My husband and I had a baby girl together and I couldnt be happier. She is everything I could have ever dreamed of. His kids love her and think of her as their sister. We never refer to anyone as half or step...unless we legally have to.
The Two middle kids problems were continuing to get worse and worse. In July of 2009, My husbands youngest daughter was admitted to a residentail facility to deal with ADD and ODD issues. She came home in October and seemed to be making some progress. While she was gone, her brother went sliding down hill in a BIG way. He has been on all kinds of medications, and as of today, there are no other medications we can turn to, and no higher doses. He has severe ADHD and conduct disorder. While on the medicine for ADHD, is is still 94% from standard deviation. That is a lot of loose ends for being on medicine. His daughter is on Conccerta 54mg and Respiradal.
I myself have medical problems and am at my wits ends trying to help these children. My marriage (even without the strains of special needs kids) is rocky at best. My husband dosent like to admit that his kids problems are as severe as the doctors have told us they are.
My question is this.... I am scared for my daughter. She is my main concern. My stepkids have a mother. They do see her, and she wants to be more active in their lives. My daughter only has a 50% chance of inheriting the genitics that cause some of these problems, but enviornment can play a factor too. I am also worried for her safety. She has not 1 but 2 people to worrry about in her home.
If you were in my situation, would you take your child and leave, or would you stay and do all you could and hope for the best.
I hope I do not sound like a horrible person. I truly love these kids, but as a mother, I have to put my own daughters well being and happiness in the forefront of my mind above that of all others. I just really need some guidance from others in the same kind of situation as me I guess.
Thank you so much for bearing with me, and for any help you might have to offer!
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