Heavy hearted
Member
20 year old son released from prison in November 20 2017 after serving a year and was placed on 15 months probation. .
We let him come back home. Offered to take him to get GED classes and pay for them. Payed insurance on vehicle for two months until he could find a job. He has court fines, restitution fees and probation fees that needed to be paid monthly. 5 months out, still no job. Wanting to party with friends, stay out all hours of the night knowing we had to get up for work the next morning. He went through a roadblock, was arrested for weed possession and paraphernalia. He bailed himself out. We went and signed for him and brought him back home. Next day, girlfriend came to the house and asked why he would jeopardize his probation with this kind of stuff. He claimed it was not his ( may have been...may not have been). We will never know. because he has lied so much. His Dad and I sat him down while his girlfriend was here and had "a come to Jesus meeting." Explained to him, we would still help him get on the right track. but one more incident and that would be it. He would have to move out. He agreed that no more problems would come up.......2 weeks later, got a call from police dpt saying my son was pulled over with friends...drinking and driving. He still is suffering from hip injuries in 2016 from a wreck that almost killed him because of drinking and driving. Luck has it, he was not arrested. He had taken my tahoe to have his joy ride without permission. He was not on our insurance, luckily he didn't kill anyone or wreck and injure himself or the friends riding with him. My son has been given so many chances. He does his best thinking after the fact. He was asked to move out ( this was the worst day of my life..... I thought) He cursed his father, told me that I had never taken up for him when his Dad would discipline him for wrong doing. So on, so on and so on. We did turn the title of his vehicle to him, made him get all of his belongings and asked him not to ever return to our house. We knew he had no where to go. He has couched surfed and finally moved in with girlfriend's Dad. Got a call from him yesterday telling me goodbye because he was probably going back to prison. He was going to job interview, got t boned by another vehicle. Well with no insurance, he got another ticket and has court in November. No vehicle, no job, and no money for his fines. He will have to serve his full fourteen years in prison at 20 years old. Girlfriend told me that he has been trying, no drugs or alcohol. He just has bad luck everytime he tries to better himself. My husband refuses to help him. I feel like I have been constantly torn between my husband and son for years now. My son blames his father ( calling him a military hardass) for the way he was disciplined as a child. I can't stand the thought of my young son going to prison for 14 years. I have cried until I just can't cry anymore. I did go see him yesterday and he has aged since he moved out. He has such sadness and hopelessness on his face. I am faithful and honest with my husband so I talked everything over with him and he refuses to give him another dime. We have actually paid out around $8000
since he was 15 years old for tickets, previous run in with the law and hospital bill from wreck in 2016.I know this is lengthy, but I need help. God has gotten me through this so far. Right now I am at rock bottom emotionally. We still have a 23 year old that we are paying college tuition for. I want her to succeed in life and has never been any trouble besides the regular teenage things. I am so defeated right now that it's hard to make the corners of my mouth turn upward.
We let him come back home. Offered to take him to get GED classes and pay for them. Payed insurance on vehicle for two months until he could find a job. He has court fines, restitution fees and probation fees that needed to be paid monthly. 5 months out, still no job. Wanting to party with friends, stay out all hours of the night knowing we had to get up for work the next morning. He went through a roadblock, was arrested for weed possession and paraphernalia. He bailed himself out. We went and signed for him and brought him back home. Next day, girlfriend came to the house and asked why he would jeopardize his probation with this kind of stuff. He claimed it was not his ( may have been...may not have been). We will never know. because he has lied so much. His Dad and I sat him down while his girlfriend was here and had "a come to Jesus meeting." Explained to him, we would still help him get on the right track. but one more incident and that would be it. He would have to move out. He agreed that no more problems would come up.......2 weeks later, got a call from police dpt saying my son was pulled over with friends...drinking and driving. He still is suffering from hip injuries in 2016 from a wreck that almost killed him because of drinking and driving. Luck has it, he was not arrested. He had taken my tahoe to have his joy ride without permission. He was not on our insurance, luckily he didn't kill anyone or wreck and injure himself or the friends riding with him. My son has been given so many chances. He does his best thinking after the fact. He was asked to move out ( this was the worst day of my life..... I thought) He cursed his father, told me that I had never taken up for him when his Dad would discipline him for wrong doing. So on, so on and so on. We did turn the title of his vehicle to him, made him get all of his belongings and asked him not to ever return to our house. We knew he had no where to go. He has couched surfed and finally moved in with girlfriend's Dad. Got a call from him yesterday telling me goodbye because he was probably going back to prison. He was going to job interview, got t boned by another vehicle. Well with no insurance, he got another ticket and has court in November. No vehicle, no job, and no money for his fines. He will have to serve his full fourteen years in prison at 20 years old. Girlfriend told me that he has been trying, no drugs or alcohol. He just has bad luck everytime he tries to better himself. My husband refuses to help him. I feel like I have been constantly torn between my husband and son for years now. My son blames his father ( calling him a military hardass) for the way he was disciplined as a child. I can't stand the thought of my young son going to prison for 14 years. I have cried until I just can't cry anymore. I did go see him yesterday and he has aged since he moved out. He has such sadness and hopelessness on his face. I am faithful and honest with my husband so I talked everything over with him and he refuses to give him another dime. We have actually paid out around $8000
since he was 15 years old for tickets, previous run in with the law and hospital bill from wreck in 2016.I know this is lengthy, but I need help. God has gotten me through this so far. Right now I am at rock bottom emotionally. We still have a 23 year old that we are paying college tuition for. I want her to succeed in life and has never been any trouble besides the regular teenage things. I am so defeated right now that it's hard to make the corners of my mouth turn upward.