Latest update...

Discussion in 'Parent Emeritus' started by ksm, Jun 12, 2018.

  1. ksm

    ksm Well-Known Member

    older Difficult Child was on her way to work on Sunday and made a left turn...didn't see the car headed towards her. Now her little car is totaled. No one was hurt, thank God. She was charged with failure to yield right of way. The car was 18 years old...just liability insurance.

    She hadn't lived at home for the last two months and hadn't iniated contact with us. She has called, but just t say she's dropping by to pick up something of hers. I have even tried to get her to pack up her stuff before I end up boxing it up.

    I am sure with no car, I will hear from her more. She is staying with some guy who she says is just a friend, but it must be with benefits...based on some of her FB posts and pictures.


    Younge turned 18 yesterday. At least I don't have to be worried that the court will say she's a child in need of care. She's an adult who needs to make better choices or have consequences.

    Now to try to start living and enjoying my life,

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  2. RN0441

    RN0441 100% better than I was but not at 100% yet

    So glad she is okay. Cars can be replaced.

    Yes agree that it's time to take care of you!
  3. Tanya M

    Tanya M Living with an attitude of gratitude Staff Member

    I'm glad she was not hurt. Too bad about the car. She has two legs that can carry her. When I was a young mom with no car I would strap my son into the snuggie, walk 2 miles to the bus stop, ride the bus to the grocery store, buy only enough that I could carry, ride the bus back, then walk the 2 miles home. There were some days I would make two trips.

    YES!!! This is a good thing. Be very good to yourself.
    A good place to start is getting an ice cream cone!
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  4. DazedandConfused

    DazedandConfused Active Member

    Yes, enjoy your life!

    Glad she wasn't hurt.
  5. New Leaf

    New Leaf Well-Known Member

    Ksm, you have bent over backwards to help your two girls. Everything you have taught them is there. I am glad your older daughter did not get hurt. That’s a big lesson she will hopefully learn from.
    Younger 18 year old. Well, our kids grow up and will do as they please. Famous words “I am an adult now.” (Choke, cough).
    Live your life to the fullest, find things to do that give you joy! You matter!
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  6. recoveringenabler

    recoveringenabler Well-Known Member Staff Member

    I completely support that choice!
  7. Tired out

    Tired out Active Member

    I hope you can enjoy your life. I am struggling with that and my difficult child is 21.
  8. ksm

    ksm Well-Known Member

    One week since car accident. She went to work that evening, had Monday off. Called on Tuesday and said she thought she needed to see a doctor because of being sore from the accident. I didn't offer her $ for the copay.

    She got a note to be off work for a week, pain killers, muscle relaxers, and anti inflammatory medications. Two days later I text her to see how she's doing... And...she's in the next state south of us. Texted her yesterday if she would like to eat with us for Fathers Day... Won't be back til Sunday night.

    But, she will also be in the state east of us on monday and Tuesday. I bet she went to the doctor just to be off work to travel with friends... I am disappointed and disgusted. And her younger sister is spinning out of control too...but that's another post.

    One week til our month long vacation starts... Ksm
  9. Littleboylost

    Littleboylost On the road unwanted to travel

    I am sorry to hear these girls remain in a poor state of behaviour.
    Take you well deserved vacation and enjoy life! You deserve it.
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  10. ksm

    ksm Well-Known Member

    And it keeps getting worse. She texted me to day. Phone is dead. No money to reactivate. Oh, and she no longer has a job.

    She's still in the next state over with the guy she lives with...

    We leave on vacation in 6 days. Will be gone for a month...

  11. New Leaf

    New Leaf Well-Known Member

    Oh boy Ksm. She will have to learn the hard way. Don’t fret dear, she will continue to do whatever she chooses.
    No matter what.
    Please do try to enjoy your vacation!
  12. AppleCori

    AppleCori Well-Known Member

    Oh no.

    Well, hopefully she will figure this stuff out soon.

    Are you leaving younger daughter in the home alone while you are gone?

    We just went away and left younger step-son alone, and he was obviously vaping in the house while we were gone. I’m not sure that we will do that again. Last time we left him here alone, several years ago, he had a party. This time he didn’t, so it was an improvement, I guess.

    Have a great time on your vacation!
  13. ksm

    ksm Well-Known Member

    No, she will not be in the home, will need to stay with her dad. OR...she will be couch surfing like she has been doing since she turned 18. We were willing to pay a house sitter so she could stay here, but she spun out of control, wouldn't come home, then lied about where she was and who she was with.

  14. CareTooMuch

    CareTooMuch Active Member

    Ksm, I'm sorry to hear things are so stressful but hopefully you can recharge and really find some peace while on vacation.
  15. Triedntrue

    Triedntrue Active Member

    It sounds like you need this vacation. Try to put your daughters out of your mind as much as possible and enjoy your vacation. Severly limit or don't answer calls from your daughters.
  16. ksm

    ksm Well-Known Member

    Older surprised me... She called last night, was concerned about younger sister, told me that the person she lives with said she could ask younger sis tear stay with them, if she didn't want to stay with their dad. I guess she has heard about what was going on. She didn't come out and tell me that younger was using...but it was implied.

    Younger did come home and spent the night here, and a lot of the day packing up clothes and doing some laundry. She did say she needed to get her ":censored2:" together...and I said physical xxxx or mental xxxx and she said mental.