letter in progress to judge-
- Thread starter klmno
- Start date
klmno
Active Member
You know, on the request for a hearing to order FAPT under a chins a couple of weeks ago, the judge or her personal clerk wrote "court can't order fapt; talk to CSA or DSS". Now I know this judge knows that Department of Juvenile Justice can get FAPT. But, I wonder...this judge also ordered difficult child to a detention program last June that he would never qualify for because of his age. Everyone here, even po, said they KNEW that the judge was aware that difficult child was too young for it. Ultimately judge let difficult child out of detention with a suspended sentence.
Given that when I testified last Jan about the mst, difficult child's issues, my therpay as a young 20+yo, my family's abuse, where I wanted difficult child to live if something happened to me (not family) etc., and by the end of the hearing I honestly believe she was on my side and I know she took notes on the computer, I wondered at difficult child's last hearing if she intentionally ordered that program so she could justify letting him go home after 30 days.
Now, I wonder if she wrote what she did and refused that request for a hearing in order to keep this out of the courts. I wonder if I should just apply again asking for removal from probation, so I can access help through DSS.
Am I over-thinking this? Would she bother looking up her notes on her computer?
I also told testified, while being questioned by the GAL that GAL had not opened any doors to accessing additional help for difficult child, as she was assigned specificly to do. And, that if the day ever came where I could not meet all difficult child's needs, I would have hoped that I could meet with GAL and discuss what is in difficult child's best interest, but given how gal and everyone else had been more interested in making rash decisions, then getting them ordered by the judge, then forcing them down my throat, rather than discuss anything with me about my son's best interest, I probably would never take that approach. I told them I would probably die rather than ask for help from them again.
Yes I said that- in court.
Oh- by the way- she started out as a school teacher, FWIW. And she's into writing/English/grammar.
Given that when I testified last Jan about the mst, difficult child's issues, my therpay as a young 20+yo, my family's abuse, where I wanted difficult child to live if something happened to me (not family) etc., and by the end of the hearing I honestly believe she was on my side and I know she took notes on the computer, I wondered at difficult child's last hearing if she intentionally ordered that program so she could justify letting him go home after 30 days.
Now, I wonder if she wrote what she did and refused that request for a hearing in order to keep this out of the courts. I wonder if I should just apply again asking for removal from probation, so I can access help through DSS.
Am I over-thinking this? Would she bother looking up her notes on her computer?
I also told testified, while being questioned by the GAL that GAL had not opened any doors to accessing additional help for difficult child, as she was assigned specificly to do. And, that if the day ever came where I could not meet all difficult child's needs, I would have hoped that I could meet with GAL and discuss what is in difficult child's best interest, but given how gal and everyone else had been more interested in making rash decisions, then getting them ordered by the judge, then forcing them down my throat, rather than discuss anything with me about my son's best interest, I probably would never take that approach. I told them I would probably die rather than ask for help from them again.
Yes I said that- in court.
Oh- by the way- she started out as a school teacher, FWIW. And she's into writing/English/grammar.
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klmno,
I am so very sorry. You sound so overwhelmed, and I am sure you must feel that way. I very much remember the feeling - unsure of whether I would be physically safe it my child came home, of if my child would be physically safe if he came home, unable to find ANY services to help that even approached a price range we could afford, being afraid that we would never find a way to help Wiz, and just totally having major depression, anxiety and PTSD.
I remember what all you have been through.
the one piece of advice I can give is to get the phone book and call a church. Ask them if they have any programs for mentally ill teens, or if the pastor/priest/reverend knows of any groups that have any programs that might fit this bill. Then call whomever they suggest, or call another church.
The Catholic Church often has substantial resources, including funding help (when we had to refinance the house because the mortgage company messed up our mortgage, husband got a substantial grant from the Catholic Church here, largely because we had been through so much with Wiz). The Eagles (Fraternal Order of), and the Moose Lodge here also have resources and contacts. So did the counsellor at the elementary school and the resource officer at the jr high (police officer at the school who works to help kids in trouble, he had the most complete list of placement options that I have ever seen in this state - even our therapist hadn't seen half of the placement options on this list - and she had been around this community for over 15 years!).
Just keep calling and telling your story to each person, and asking for your help. It is OK if you cry. They understand and will do their best to help.
And I understand if you can't do this. It is just what I did when I felt I was out of options and that Wiz was once again a danger to us.
I hope and pray this judge will help you. Or someone will.
I am sending lots of prayers, hugs, luck and support. No matter what.
Susie
I am so very sorry. You sound so overwhelmed, and I am sure you must feel that way. I very much remember the feeling - unsure of whether I would be physically safe it my child came home, of if my child would be physically safe if he came home, unable to find ANY services to help that even approached a price range we could afford, being afraid that we would never find a way to help Wiz, and just totally having major depression, anxiety and PTSD.
I remember what all you have been through.
the one piece of advice I can give is to get the phone book and call a church. Ask them if they have any programs for mentally ill teens, or if the pastor/priest/reverend knows of any groups that have any programs that might fit this bill. Then call whomever they suggest, or call another church.
The Catholic Church often has substantial resources, including funding help (when we had to refinance the house because the mortgage company messed up our mortgage, husband got a substantial grant from the Catholic Church here, largely because we had been through so much with Wiz). The Eagles (Fraternal Order of), and the Moose Lodge here also have resources and contacts. So did the counsellor at the elementary school and the resource officer at the jr high (police officer at the school who works to help kids in trouble, he had the most complete list of placement options that I have ever seen in this state - even our therapist hadn't seen half of the placement options on this list - and she had been around this community for over 15 years!).
Just keep calling and telling your story to each person, and asking for your help. It is OK if you cry. They understand and will do their best to help.
And I understand if you can't do this. It is just what I did when I felt I was out of options and that Wiz was once again a danger to us.
I hope and pray this judge will help you. Or someone will.
I am sending lots of prayers, hugs, luck and support. No matter what.
Susie
klmno
Active Member
Thanks, Susie! The principal should be in her meeting with sd higher ups as we speak. Then I go to the iep triennial evaluation at the school in a little while. I hope I can find out what the sd is going to do or not do before I leave there today.
I stayed up most the night researching the law- I couldn't sleep again. I found a law that says a court can order a juvenile into directly Residential Treatment Center (RTC) and parent is to sign an agreement with county funding agency (about partial payment, I'm sure), but that this can only be done if all less restrictive means have been tried. Well, if I've tried all less restrictive means that I can access, would this justify me asking the court to do this? IOW, if the sd won't recommend any county assistance and the PO won't do anything, then what other methods are available to me? Even if the court orders it and that gets me to the ccounty team and we work out something less restrictive that the judge approves, at least it gets me there.
I stayed up most the night researching the law- I couldn't sleep again. I found a law that says a court can order a juvenile into directly Residential Treatment Center (RTC) and parent is to sign an agreement with county funding agency (about partial payment, I'm sure), but that this can only be done if all less restrictive means have been tried. Well, if I've tried all less restrictive means that I can access, would this justify me asking the court to do this? IOW, if the sd won't recommend any county assistance and the PO won't do anything, then what other methods are available to me? Even if the court orders it and that gets me to the ccounty team and we work out something less restrictive that the judge approves, at least it gets me there.
Shari
IsItFridayYet?
I've been away and just now catching up. I am so sorry you continue to meet road block after road block. No matter the outcome, you can rest assured you truly have done everything you possibly could. Sending hugs and strength.
And yes, I'd say you have plenty of justification to ask for that.
(and the original letter is very good)
And yes, I'd say you have plenty of justification to ask for that.
(and the original letter is very good)
