She relapsed

[Nancy]

TM they say the average addict relapses seven times so we are almost there.

Nancy

 

[busywend]

I am so glad you are able to let her figure it out.
You've come a long way on a very rough road.
I am glad you are still able to keep moving on.

Think about how far you have come! I know it is another disappointment...but you do get to see how you are better at handling it.

 

[svengandhi]

I am so sorry to hear this. I hope she is doing better by now.

 

[DDD]

It is good news that she is still at the sober house. Somehow I thought she had moved in with the new boyfriend. There is still hope that she can turn it around without a slide into the pit. I keep you all in my thoughts and prayers. DDD

 

[Star*]

Nancy,

I think so often of her and your family and we really do say our dinner prayers to include you all. I wanted to tell you and not in a PM that I am so proud of your progress. I know the heartache this brings with a child and what the end result can ultimately be.

Having the courage to turn your back on the destruction done by a loved one and walk away from the world you built is not easy. I applaud your journey. Some day you will applaud your daughters struggle and like we do you now - her difficult journey .

Hugs and love - Star

 

[Fran]

Nancy, I was thinking the same thing about how the average of 7 relapses before sobriety really clicks. I hope she is almost done.
Sending good thoughts.

 

[Nancy]

I am certain the only reason I am handling this so much better now is because she is out of the house. I think about all the families here who are struggling with their difficult child's still in their house and I know how difficult it is to detach under those circumstances. I find myself unable to give those members advice on how to survive because I survived day-to-day. It is so much harder to deal on a daily basis with difficult child's when their every move affects the entire family. Once difficult child left the house everything changed. Of course I handle thing much better now, I don't see what she is doing and it is not in my face, I don't have to wonder where she is or what she's doing or what kind of mood she will come home in or what will be stolen next from my house.

The only thing I am doing better now is not relenting and letting her come back home or rescuing here when she falls.

Nancy

 

[busywend]

That is, I am sure, helpful for those still in it with a difficult child living at home.....a bit of learning I am sure.

 

[Ephchap]

Nancy, I'm so very sorry to hear she relapsed, but you're absolutely right about it taking several times for many. Not an easy thing to deal with as a parent though, as I know all too well.

The other house's rules about not dating aren't uncommon. Most AA and substance abuse programs encourage the addicts to not get into a relationship for a year, as they need time to work on just themselves. That being said, it's definitely hard to feel so alone, at times.

I'm glad J is still at the sober house and is hopefully back on track. The fact that she's still there is definitely a good thing. One little misstep doesn't mean she can't start moving forward again.

Hugs to you and hope that she continues with the program.

Deb

 

[CrazyinVA]

My mother (an alcoholic) was in at least 3 inpatient programs before she finally stayed sober. Sometimes it does take a few tries.

Hang in there.