We adopted our son when he was 2 days old. (He is now 19) His childhood consisted of being kicked out of school for what seemed like every year. Although we were proactive with counseling, things got much worse when he was a junior in highschool. He started distancing himself from us, smoking weed, and getting into trouble a lot. Things got worse when he was a senior in Highschool, where he was kicked out of school for good. He has used every drug now you can think of, stolen our car, stolen money and has now started to call us by our first names as if we are not his real parents. I guess I wanted you to understand the different dynamics we are working with. He is not only a difficult child, but is adopted and feels entitled and has not kept a job longer than a few months.
My son only comes over to visit when he wants money. He recently started dating a girl that has a small child and now together they have a small child and no jobs. My son came over about a month ago to ask for $150 to help out with diapers and such, then the next week came over for $60. He always says he will pay us back but never does. A little over a week ago, he called my wife and asked for more money and we both decided we were no longer going to give him money so we said no. He then came over to our house to visit and when we were not looking he stole a check from my desk. I was checking my bank account when I noticed a check for $350 cashed made out to my son. I texted my son telling him I knew what he had done and informed him He had by the end of the week to get the money back to me or I was calling the police. However, my son called me and said... " I know what I did was wrong but I was needing the money and you wouldn't give it to me so I just took it" I responded by telling him yes it was wrong and not only that but it breaks our trust even more and not only that but $350 is a lot to take from me it is a set back. He then responded by telling me he knows we have a lot of money because of our vacation to Hawaii, and the new house we now have. I told him that doesnt mean we have money, it means we have a lot of debt, and it still doesnt justify stealing. He then proceeded to yell at me and curse. I kept it brief and told him make sure to get my money back to me. I decided at that point to file a police report.
3 days later he showed up at our house with a check from his girl friends parents in the amount of $350 and asks me what kind of parent wouldnt give to their kid in need. I stuck to my guns and tried to keep the conversation short. I told him I loved him and he was no longer welcome in our home until he gets things turned around. This morning I have just found out he has indeed been arrested and tried calling me 8 times but I was sleeping. He is so furious it has me doubting myself. His girlfriend sent me a text also asking why would you have him arrested after he gave you the money back? Any advice is welcome
