WiseChoices
Well-Known Member
Hi all,
DC1 got a job a few weeks ago. It's at a large discount store, min. wage, but it's better than not working at all .They let him start very quickly, and he applied and followed up with a visit on his own accord and the in person visit got him the interview. So he was acting on his own behalf! It's not utilizing his degree, but it's a start.
The medications seem to be helping. He is on Wellbutrin and Buspar (non addictive anti anxiety medications). The Wellbutrin gives him energy and he seems to be doing well on the medications even though he had a panic attack at work despite the Buspar .
I told him yesterday that now that he is working , I will give him October to work a full month and then Nov 1 , I want him to start paying toward household expenses: $100 for electric, $100 for food, and $25 for his phone line every first of the month.
He confided that he had gotten a speeding ticket the day before ($278 plus $264 to elect to go to driving school !!!) And had kept it from me because he did not want a lecture . He wanted me to look over the ticket etc to make sure he was handling it all ok. I only listened and helped with the information he specifically wanted from me .I then told him I would not lecture him as he is an adult and I am done parenting him. That we relate to each other adult to adult now which is why I am charging him towards household expenses.
Because he was worried about money with the speeding ticket, I was able to teach him a little basic money management which is something he has refused to hear from me so far. He will be able to meet all his financial obligations with an organized system with his money. He thanked me afterwards and even asked for a hug!
In the past, I would have "helped" (enabled) by paying the ticket and it never even crossed my mind!!!! He has already realized that he needs a better paying job and is continuing to apply everywhere he can.
I feel optimistic today with his efforts! Thank you for listening.
DC1 got a job a few weeks ago. It's at a large discount store, min. wage, but it's better than not working at all .They let him start very quickly, and he applied and followed up with a visit on his own accord and the in person visit got him the interview. So he was acting on his own behalf! It's not utilizing his degree, but it's a start.
The medications seem to be helping. He is on Wellbutrin and Buspar (non addictive anti anxiety medications). The Wellbutrin gives him energy and he seems to be doing well on the medications even though he had a panic attack at work despite the Buspar .
I told him yesterday that now that he is working , I will give him October to work a full month and then Nov 1 , I want him to start paying toward household expenses: $100 for electric, $100 for food, and $25 for his phone line every first of the month.
He confided that he had gotten a speeding ticket the day before ($278 plus $264 to elect to go to driving school !!!) And had kept it from me because he did not want a lecture . He wanted me to look over the ticket etc to make sure he was handling it all ok. I only listened and helped with the information he specifically wanted from me .I then told him I would not lecture him as he is an adult and I am done parenting him. That we relate to each other adult to adult now which is why I am charging him towards household expenses.
Because he was worried about money with the speeding ticket, I was able to teach him a little basic money management which is something he has refused to hear from me so far. He will be able to meet all his financial obligations with an organized system with his money. He thanked me afterwards and even asked for a hug!
In the past, I would have "helped" (enabled) by paying the ticket and it never even crossed my mind!!!! He has already realized that he needs a better paying job and is continuing to apply everywhere he can.
I feel optimistic today with his efforts! Thank you for listening.
