Wow, I came hear looking for help - very similar situation.
My son is 18.5 and just graduated HS. VERY high IQ, a&B studetn in school, but has always been oppositional.
Has been on medications for ADD since 12. He was very involved in out-of school athletics at an elite level until Jr year.
We found out late in 2011that he has been smoking port for almost 2 years.
promised to quit and actually think he id
However he has been caught with pop, pipes, lighters etc. - multiple times over last 3 months by husband or I or both.
Husband had latent alcohol abuse issues and I was treated for shopping addition.
I have been 'clean' - no credit card binges for 2 years - husband has been mostly sober for 3 years. I am worried that he is slipping as work pressures are ridicuolouly high.
I have found son's weed and bongs 3x in last 10 days - that I have not told husband about as I am worried about him going over the edge.
Son see counselor, but does not seem to want to or have any incentive to quit smoking.
He has smoked in our house - while alone and with 13 yr old son in other part of house
he is not a bad kid, just that i see this habit controlling him.
He is supposed to go away to big 10 school in fall and frankly - I am worried that he will blow everything, money, opportunity, etc.
Any suggestions on where to start?
Welcome to the SA forum of the CD board. I have started a new thread for you so we can get to know you. I think you have reason to worry about your son going off to college in the fall. In my experience, substance abuse was the reason my difficult child did not do well in college despite being very smart. Could you tell him that he has to prove himself in a community college before you will finance him going off to the big 10 school?
~Kathy