Star*
call 911........call 911
Tomorrow the "agency" will try to move Dude 200 miles NW from his foster home that is WORKING and getting results. Why? We think it is setting him up to fail. Dude can't survive well without a family support system. And he's 18 so if they force him to sign himself into a placement that is not tried and not going to work, and he quits? He's out of their program - and consequently homeless. So tomorrow, we find out.
They have said he's not in compliance with their program. To be in compliance they said (after contract) he must attend school 4 days a week. (His probation says he must have a GED by 2010) They said he must have a job (his probation says he needs to pay his fines doesn't say has to have a job) - he's been working around our house; and doing a good job to earn money for probation.
This sending him away makes NO sense other than they have done NOTHING to assist him with job help/training etc. They have made two suggestions BOTH of which they knew would NOT come to fruition because of restrictions on where and when he can attend GED classes. (ie he has no ride, he was in self contained and night school won't take self contained kids period in this district) OR he can go to Voc rehab for job training during the day - and oops my bad - he has to go to school huh witha little twitch of their mouth.
So.....I posted on the board this dilema. Personally I wouldn't have thought of this solution, but wanted to publically thank D3 for her brilliant idea. Fingers crossed - we went in search of a job training program that WOULD take him convicted felon and all....but non-violent. The Salvation Army we have been purusing for years has a new manger that is really on the ball. I spoke with her about Dudes problem and how we were worried he would be homeless. She has created a job training program - and took interviews. Dude got one of the positions - volunteer, no pay but nonetheless - could work into a paying job. When he came out of the 45 minute interview he was beaming - literally. Finally someone had taken him for him - earrings and all.
But.....not the most amazing part.
Yesterday he informed the school that he NEEDED to get at least ONE day in the Job training program BEFORE this meeting (using his head to think ahead and have proof he's in the program participating) via a letter he will ask his mgr. for today.
YES - today!!!! AND
He got written letters from the principal, teacher and tutor on his progress for the meeting tomorrow. He'll have the one for job training *you know like the agecny couldn't help him figure out -
He spoke with his probation officer who said a job by the 15th or jail /work camp despite paying his fines....and THIS will count as a job - paying or not it's called OWE occupational work experience!!!!
He's also been to school every day, done 2 stints at community service, has been getting along at the fosters and doing what is asked of him, helping out their kids, and babysitting for a friend of theirs.
BUT WAIT THERE IS MORE .........
He called ME yesterday to see IF he could spend the night so that he could BE ON TIME for his NEW POSITION....(crickets chirp) blink...
If he got there early enough he offered to rake the leaves as many as he could before dark to offset the gas cost. (more crickets)
Then laid out his clothes, cleaned his shoes
TOOK A COAT I OFFERED
GOT UP ON TIME without begging and (#U$()(I*)(@ at all
I packed him a lunch (his first job lunch
)
And we left.......and........he was even willing to stand in the 25 degree weather without complaining because no one gets to the job before 8:30 and I have to drop him off by 7:45AM.....
I got thanked for the coat, the ride, the lunch......and hugged.
NOW WHY would they meet us tomorrow and send him away???? TO FAIL???
I'm not going to be very nice if they find a way out of THIS one.
PLUS - DUDE also is looking for a job that pays closer to home .....he just needed to know what it was like to WIN an interview....to give him that I can confidence.....
I'm just amazed.....and like DF said "about time" but yes yes crusty older curmudgeon.....he's thinking beyond 10 minutes from now - and NOT really defiant about any of it. (holding breath)
I swear to you Toto - I could just kiss you for that book - How to talk so your teen will listen and how to listen so your teen will talk. MwaH.
Just wanted to share the pay off from a lot of hard work.
I told Dude getting out of the car I was proud of him....and he walked into that job training place - and sat down outside - and someone came out and actually was there so they let him in!
Except for the sponge bob ski hat pulled up to a point and his pants tucked into his socks - you would have thought he was as normal as any other kid.
I
They have said he's not in compliance with their program. To be in compliance they said (after contract) he must attend school 4 days a week. (His probation says he must have a GED by 2010) They said he must have a job (his probation says he needs to pay his fines doesn't say has to have a job) - he's been working around our house; and doing a good job to earn money for probation.
This sending him away makes NO sense other than they have done NOTHING to assist him with job help/training etc. They have made two suggestions BOTH of which they knew would NOT come to fruition because of restrictions on where and when he can attend GED classes. (ie he has no ride, he was in self contained and night school won't take self contained kids period in this district) OR he can go to Voc rehab for job training during the day - and oops my bad - he has to go to school huh witha little twitch of their mouth.
So.....I posted on the board this dilema. Personally I wouldn't have thought of this solution, but wanted to publically thank D3 for her brilliant idea. Fingers crossed - we went in search of a job training program that WOULD take him convicted felon and all....but non-violent. The Salvation Army we have been purusing for years has a new manger that is really on the ball. I spoke with her about Dudes problem and how we were worried he would be homeless. She has created a job training program - and took interviews. Dude got one of the positions - volunteer, no pay but nonetheless - could work into a paying job. When he came out of the 45 minute interview he was beaming - literally. Finally someone had taken him for him - earrings and all.
But.....not the most amazing part.
Yesterday he informed the school that he NEEDED to get at least ONE day in the Job training program BEFORE this meeting (using his head to think ahead and have proof he's in the program participating) via a letter he will ask his mgr. for today.
YES - today!!!! AND
He got written letters from the principal, teacher and tutor on his progress for the meeting tomorrow. He'll have the one for job training *you know like the agecny couldn't help him figure out -
He spoke with his probation officer who said a job by the 15th or jail /work camp despite paying his fines....and THIS will count as a job - paying or not it's called OWE occupational work experience!!!!
He's also been to school every day, done 2 stints at community service, has been getting along at the fosters and doing what is asked of him, helping out their kids, and babysitting for a friend of theirs.
BUT WAIT THERE IS MORE .........
He called ME yesterday to see IF he could spend the night so that he could BE ON TIME for his NEW POSITION....(crickets chirp) blink...
If he got there early enough he offered to rake the leaves as many as he could before dark to offset the gas cost. (more crickets)
Then laid out his clothes, cleaned his shoes
TOOK A COAT I OFFERED
GOT UP ON TIME without begging and (#U$()(I*)(@ at all
I packed him a lunch (his first job lunch
) And we left.......and........he was even willing to stand in the 25 degree weather without complaining because no one gets to the job before 8:30 and I have to drop him off by 7:45AM.....
I got thanked for the coat, the ride, the lunch......and hugged.
NOW WHY would they meet us tomorrow and send him away???? TO FAIL???
I'm not going to be very nice if they find a way out of THIS one.
PLUS - DUDE also is looking for a job that pays closer to home .....he just needed to know what it was like to WIN an interview....to give him that I can confidence.....
I'm just amazed.....and like DF said "about time" but yes yes crusty older curmudgeon.....he's thinking beyond 10 minutes from now - and NOT really defiant about any of it. (holding breath)
I swear to you Toto - I could just kiss you for that book - How to talk so your teen will listen and how to listen so your teen will talk. MwaH.
Just wanted to share the pay off from a lot of hard work.
I told Dude getting out of the car I was proud of him....and he walked into that job training place - and sat down outside - and someone came out and actually was there so they let him in!
Except for the sponge bob ski hat pulled up to a point and his pants tucked into his socks - you would have thought he was as normal as any other kid.
I
Star this is excellent news! It sounds like things are going well for you and Dude! I hope my scenerio ends up as good as yours!
YEAH DUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUDE!!!!! I'm thinking he's going to get his OWN card from Cloe!!!
