Overwhelmed, Not so long ago I used to think how can I ever stop enabling my adult kids? Like many others here I bought used cars, paid deposit/rent, food, gas, electric bills etc. I was doing this for two homeless sons and had been recently divorced. The fear, obligation and guilt I had was so overwhelming and I felt like I was drowning in my own misery. Things are NOT perfect, now, but I have been able to distance myself from 31 yr. old and the 26 yr. old is still living in his car using his last pennies from his IRS refund for a job he barely held down last yr. for 4-6 weeks, last yr. By the grace of God I have held firm in not allowing either of them to live with me but it came with a lot of push back. When we set our boundaries, they are not happy about it. But keep pressing forward and take care of yourself. Every move I made I asked God to give me the strength and wisdom to do. "God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can and the wisdom to know the difference." My prescription: "say this prayer multiple times as necessary each and every day, with a glass of water". The best thing I ever did for myself was to keep them both out of my home! I don't even allow them to visit, as harsh as that may sound, because neither have any stability in their lives and I know I'd be too weak to turn them out. (That's another boundary for me). It doesn't mean that I don't have worries or concerns for them but I at least have my safe haven to go to at the end of my work day. Stay strong, stay on this path and I will pray for you to have the strength to let your son who lives with you know his time is up in May. It will not be easy. You will cry, he will cry...but for your own well-being, in my opinion, it's the best thing you can do for yourself and continue to detach with love so that your every waking moment is not spent worrying about their disfunctionality, lonliness, hunger etc. Sending prayers.