Hi Feeling, Good to hear from you. I'm so sorry you are struggling. You give and give of yourself to your son and students. You need to give to yourself too. You need to give to yourself first. It is so unkind of your son to tell you he wants to kill himself. I don't know that he truly understands how hurtful is words are to you but regardless, it's not good for you to deal with that. We each can only do what we can bear. I've had my son tell me numerous times that he'd be better off dead. It's heartbreaking to hear that from your own child. For me, the only way I could move on was to accept that my son very well could take his own life or be killed by someone else because of the homeless lifestyle he chooses to live. How sad that a parent has to come to accept that but for me, that was the only way I could move on with my own life. In the midst of all you are dealing with I do hope you are taking time for yourself. You cannot continue to give of yourself to everyone else without replenishing your own energy reserves. Sending you love and hugs!!!