Hello RN,
Thank you so much for your response. I hope all is well with you and that your son is staying on the good path.
I'm so sorry that you are STILL going through this. So many of us here are and we have to accept that this is our normal even though it is in no way "normal". No one can possibly understand unless they go through it.
What a normal it is. It is true a parent who has not walked this path can really know the pain of it.
I spent the day with some old friends Sunday and my one friend lost her 26 year old son to a heroin overdose in her home 3 years ago. He had been sober for 9 months and was looking forward to a raise at his job and saving for (another) car. She has since married but naturally feels this pain every day. She knows she can only learn to live with it. The pain will never go away. She feels a lot of guilt because she's relieved she doesn't have to "worry about him every day" anymore. A few weeks ago she was cleaning her crawl space and found about 1000 packs of heroin. She couldn't believe it and had no idea that he had purchased so much and when!
How sad for your friend. To have a son clean for 9 months and changing his life to overdosing in her home. That’s so tragic. I’m sorry. 1000 packs of heroin, wow. No words.
When I feel helpless and hopeless I turn it over to God and try to self comfort and focus on the positives in my life. We all have them and you have them too. That is where I get my strength. You have helped me tremendously on this journey.
This is a good reminder to switch focus, give it to God and just breathe. Some days I can keep busy and others, I just rest and do what I can. You and others on this site have helped me tremendously as well, RN, I am so thankful. What an immeasurable blessing it is to be able to share with hearts who understand.
Leaf
