Hospital again
My hubby don't drink. He is not a bad person, he just need me to guide him step by step. Like tell him what to do in exact expectation. At least he is a good provider.
buddy
New Member
Oh sorry Crystal, wasn't suggesting anything about him, only a fantasy....just adding my wish for you to have a break and for you to not have to worry about anything while you do so. In real life I hope this insurance lady can help find something to help. But I can see you are strong and will do what you need to do in any event. Your kids are blessed to have you for sure.
Well difficult child is going to be discharge tomorrow whether I like it or not.
Insurance lady called say she spoke to psychiatric hospital and seems like they can't keep him cos his behavior is good. Aspie are super smart, they certainly know they need to put things together in order to go home. No medical plan, no resources as usual.
Tell me to apply Katie Beckett again.
Insurance lady called say she spoke to psychiatric hospital and seems like they can't keep him cos his behavior is good. Aspie are super smart, they certainly know they need to put things together in order to go home. No medical plan, no resources as usual.
Tell me to apply Katie Beckett again.
L
Liahona
Guest
Crystal, your husband sounds like mine, autistic. Not bad, not mean, but very clueless when it comes to helping. And he has his own routines and sensory issues and weird ways of thinking (executive function problems).
I hope you find some respite soon, you are at a breaking point. I would suggest locking up all the knives and putting alarms on the bedroom doors. Maybe getting the computer under lock and key while difficult child is away. Just not letting him on it at all or have it be in sight. I don't know if it would make it worse or better only you would know that.
I hope you find some respite soon, you are at a breaking point. I would suggest locking up all the knives and putting alarms on the bedroom doors. Maybe getting the computer under lock and key while difficult child is away. Just not letting him on it at all or have it be in sight. I don't know if it would make it worse or better only you would know that.
buddy
New Member
Wow, that is really interesting. I wonder how he feels about what has happened and if he notices a difference off the adderal xr... I hope at least your changing the medications might make it better at home. Do you live by any agencies/clinics/organizations that work with kids on the spectrum? We have a few large child development centers that have therapies and social skill groups for kids on the spectrum thru adulthood....
I had difficult child go to social skills training classes which brought in ideas because people who were connected to the therapists could then start to see what i was talking about and that is how he moved into other therapies. Social skill programs are fine to go to , but didn't address the aggression, the rages. so it helped to go for that benefit too.
The transition at least will let you see how he does at home and have a staff to report to right away. Hope he feels better and that when he comes back home and quickly back into some kind of routine with your other two. Does it work to write down what you need from hubby? You are right up there on my wish list for some relief! I mean I have ONE kid, Integrated Listening Systems (ILS) three times /week and decent school (most of the time) and I get overwhelmed.... I can only imagine.
I had difficult child go to social skills training classes which brought in ideas because people who were connected to the therapists could then start to see what i was talking about and that is how he moved into other therapies. Social skill programs are fine to go to , but didn't address the aggression, the rages. so it helped to go for that benefit too.
The transition at least will let you see how he does at home and have a staff to report to right away. Hope he feels better and that when he comes back home and quickly back into some kind of routine with your other two. Does it work to write down what you need from hubby? You are right up there on my wish list for some relief! I mean I have ONE kid, Integrated Listening Systems (ILS) three times /week and decent school (most of the time) and I get overwhelmed.... I can only imagine.
You are totally a god send to me,thanks
I had my husband cut work so he can pick up difficult child 2 while I was at the psychiatric hospital with difficult child 1
Then the clinician came over at 2.30-4.30 and all seem fine, I was making his requested meatloaf and apple pie.
Right after the clinician left, he started the 'usual', can't take no for an answer, challenge me when I told him to make his choice. All I did was tell him he can only have the magnet after he helps his sister feed the dogs. And it started the verbal abuses.
We just can't send him to hospital all the time. Even for this time, we are risking losing our house to cover the medical he needs.
I know autism is no cure. Bit to be really honest, there are time I just want to die to free myself from these.
As I was halfway typing this, he was oming to verbal abusing me. I walked off to my room,he followed and wouldn't control the rages. I told him he needs to practice his safety plan. But he refused and challenged me to bring him back to psychiatric hospital. He threw a whoe bucket of clothes in my car even. I took my car keys and told him lets go. I just prudent take t anymore.
And halfway to there,he pleaded to give him a chance to calm down
I don know if I will regret later but I let him home.
I m just tired,depressed and so ready to give up
I had my husband cut work so he can pick up difficult child 2 while I was at the psychiatric hospital with difficult child 1
Then the clinician came over at 2.30-4.30 and all seem fine, I was making his requested meatloaf and apple pie.
Right after the clinician left, he started the 'usual', can't take no for an answer, challenge me when I told him to make his choice. All I did was tell him he can only have the magnet after he helps his sister feed the dogs. And it started the verbal abuses.
We just can't send him to hospital all the time. Even for this time, we are risking losing our house to cover the medical he needs.
I know autism is no cure. Bit to be really honest, there are time I just want to die to free myself from these.
As I was halfway typing this, he was oming to verbal abusing me. I walked off to my room,he followed and wouldn't control the rages. I told him he needs to practice his safety plan. But he refused and challenged me to bring him back to psychiatric hospital. He threw a whoe bucket of clothes in my car even. I took my car keys and told him lets go. I just prudent take t anymore.
And halfway to there,he pleaded to give him a chance to calm down
I don know if I will regret later but I let him home.
I m just tired,depressed and so ready to give up
buddy
New Member
This is the exact scenario I feel I may be facing. difficult child said he wanted me to bring him something, and if I dont he is gonna hit me. i said well that wont work. He said am I too tough for you now? (half thinking he needs me to reassure him I can handle it, half thinking he wants to know he can act tough to get his way) i reminded him that if he does his then he wont get his way ever again because all of his choices will be gone. i say i wont have any way to help him if he does this because there are laws about assaut. (Of course I will help him, but I want him to think he has control and to try)
I have done the same thing..."I am driving to the police station if you dont stop acting dangerous in the car"...as i am driving he starts begging, i will calm down I will...Please go home now... and I finally drive home , till the next time.
I have done the same thing..."I am driving to the police station if you dont stop acting dangerous in the car"...as i am driving he starts begging, i will calm down I will...Please go home now... and I finally drive home , till the next time.
He is 14 right?
Remember you say something like you were never married so you don't know how the husband system works. Like me, I never had an adopted kid so I really think people
Like you have a huge heart. I am about to give up even he is my own born. I am not sure if I would persist so
Long if he isnt my own
You know what I mean?
Remember you say something like you were never married so you don't know how the husband system works. Like me, I never had an adopted kid so I really think people
Like you have a huge heart. I am about to give up even he is my own born. I am not sure if I would persist so
Long if he isnt my own
You know what I mean?
buddy
New Member
huh??? you are not supposed to be SAFE??? wow, Crystal are there other hospitals there? We have like, well I dont know all of them but can count 6 off the top of my head that take adolescents. Are you in a city or far from a major metro area?
Yeah, people have said that to me before, but honestly i can't imagine loving him more if i had given birth to him. I went through much love and waiting dreamming of him, just like a pregnancy without the pain I suppose. I know the same hormones etc. dont develop but your mind still bonds even before your child is with you. Then because I wanted it so badly, I guess I even loved him more fiercely, even when it is hard. Do I want to throw in the towel at times/?? yes! same thing for my sisters who only have bio kids so I dont think it is anything different. Once you are bonded, you are bonded. I took a sacred oath and a legal oath to treat him as my own in ever way. But I hear what you are saying, here your child grew inside of you, you went thru pain to deliver him, and yet your mind now feels like it is too much. I think that is normal under such stress.... I said earlier I found myself pulling my heart back. I think I am doing it to protect myself from a potential permanent hurt....a true break sometime. Probably wont happen but I felt like I was defending myself ahead of time from some of the heart break that is inevitable when your child suffers and makes you suffer so much.
I have to ask, do you just feel like giving up or do you think you will? It makes no difference in my feelings about you, just wondering if you are really feeling that depressed. I really do care, you have helped me here too and would love to return the favor.
That said, maybe next time, you should check yourself into a psychiatric hospital! Not the kind Janet talked about when she was in that place, somewhere nice please. Then folks will have to take notice! (only half kidding)
The reason I am able to speak freely here is I know everyone go through about the same stuff and we don't judge each other. I thought about giving up the marriage and leave, I thought about giving up the child for adoption/Forster care, I even thought about to die. I am not sure if I would one day do it,but there are time I just want to empty all pills I can find and be the sleeping beauty without the prince.
I actually don't remember helping you on anything lol. I mean everyone of us here support each other. But you are sweet though.
We are in rhode island. There is only one children hospital and one pediatric psychiatric hospital. Of course there are other hospital but probably not on this field.
With all these chaos, I never had time for anything.
I actually don't remember helping you on anything lol. I mean everyone of us here support each other. But you are sweet though.
We are in rhode island. There is only one children hospital and one pediatric psychiatric hospital. Of course there are other hospital but probably not on this field.
With all these chaos, I never had time for anything.
