How to cope with the smell and the grime?

[BusynMember]

Ok...I thought of something that may work...and is more extreme than the dog shampoo. Don't laugh. I may use it on my daughter's old uniforms that she wants to keep forever and ever (the closet really stinks!!!). There is stuff out there that gets out skunk odor. If it will get rid of skunk smell, it should get rid of B.O., right?

I'm going to hide my face right now, even though I'm serious. I never thought of that before Lil's post. But I often almost swoon when I have to get into my daughter's closet where all her years of sweaty uniforms are hung up in all their glory. Can't hurt to try unless it would ruin the fabric.

 

[Lil]

Actually MWM, that's a good idea. Did some googling and this looks likely.

http://nisuscorp.com/homeowners/products/bac-azap

Maybe after washing, you could spray things down with it? You can buy it on Amazon or here: http://www.domyownpestcontrol.com/bacazap-odor-eliminator-quart-p-282.html

It has great reviews and is for all kinds of odors, even dead animals and feces and skunk. It seems to be safe for pet bedding and such, so shouldn't hurt a person to have their clothes sprayed with it.

I may have to buy some just on general principles.

 

[BusynMember]

Thanks, Lil. My poor daughter is nose blind to how badly her uniforms reek. It is really awful. I am grateful for the links and will try the products, of course when she is not home. If this stuff can kill the odor of those things, I imagine it can at least make a dent in chronic B.O. I mean, my daughter practices HARD every day in her sport and the uniforms most certainly have suffered from all that sweat that just doesn't quit. Airing it out does no good. Repeated washing...nada.n Freebreeze just adds it's own unique smell to the strong smell of stale sweat, almost making it worse.

Time to see if this works Thanks again.

 

[GuideMe]

You also have to worry about diseases. If he is that filthy, God Bless your son, he may be a health hazard to you and yours (for instance, lice, body lice, fleas ,scabies, all kinds of serious stuff I can't even think of right now), which means he should be ok with you requiring him to ditch the clothes and use soap. He can't argue with health hazards. Even when humans were at their most primal, they still bathed whether it be in rivers or what have you. So maybe you can explain to him that being clean isn't going against what he believes. I would not, repeat, would not throw those clothes into your washing machine. I hope I don't sound mean.

 

[Echolette]

In the operating room if we are operating on dead flesh, or perforated bowel, both of which smell vile and absolutely cling to every surface, we put a drop of oil of orange, or oil of wintergreen either on our masks, or under our noses. It is marvellous. I guess it wouldn't be crazy to try that.

 

[nlj]

Thank you all so much for your posts and suggestions. Thanks to those who posted about their own issues with bad-smelling children and other relatives. It's a sensitive issue. My son won't use any products that he percieves to be damaging to the environment, such as deodorant spray and many products with scents or additives. So he showers and then his armpits and feet start smelling pretty much straight away. I agree with Guideme who wrote about disease and infection spreading. I hate him going in the fridge and handling food and won't eat anything he's touched.

Cedar's post touched me:

I don't have an answer for these things that happen to us when we see our troubled children "in the flesh." I have felt the same kinds of feelings, but until reading this thread, was not aware of the power of the scent of "homeless" or the meaning, to our secret hearts, those odors might hold.

I agree with this Cedar. Smell is a potent stimulator of emotions and memories. That idea of a 'scent of homeless' is very true and very sad.

 

[SuZir]

My son won't use any products that he percieves to be damaging to the environment, such as deodorant spray and many products with scents or additives.

Would he use eco-friendly alternatives? I'm sure you can find vegan and eco-friendly products either from your home city (if there are special eco-friendly shops, at least around here every bigger city has one) or from the net. Both for body, hair and even deodorants. Can you find tall oil soap or whatever it is called in English? At least the brand commonly sold here is very eco-friendly and does wonders with smell (for example I wash my dogs with it, when they have find something really smelly to roll in, like human faeces), is cheap and can be used to many things from washing animals (or people) to washing floors, rugs and also to driving away greenflies from roses and also those kind of plants you are planning to eat in future. It is also anti-bacterial. And with nice, totally natural pine scent. It is also a by-product of paper manufacturing so something good coming from something 'evil.'

 

[Lil]

My son won't use any products that he percieves to be damaging to the environment, such as deodorant spray and many products with scents or additives.

The spray I suggested said:
"This product is a buffered and preserved aqueous solution containing surfactants, builders, fragrance, and naturally-occurring viable bacterial cultures.
This product does not contain known hazardous materials in reportable levels as defined by the OSHA Hazard Communication Standard 29 CFR 1910.1200."

It does say it might cause mild skin irritation, but also says ingesting in large quantities causes vomiting and diarrhea. So apparently, it won't kill you, just make you sick. Certainly not any worse that bleach.

As for deodorant, there are a lot of natural alternative DIY recipes on the internet. Couldn't hurt to try.

 

[greenstockings]

Coconut oil and baking soda, worked together into a paste, is a good deodorant. It's not an anti-perspirant, but it will keep stink under control for a good while.

 

[Lil]

Coconut oil and baking soda, worked together into a paste, is a good deodorant.

Yep...Those are the main ingredients in every recipe I found. Some also use arrowroot powder and essential oils. This one shows it being formed into a bar you just rub on like a deodorant stick.

http://wellnessmama.com/1523/natural-deodorant/

 

[nerfherder]

Some smell/odor controllers:

When I've been elbow-deep in the septic line feeding the steel ram through, I have used a scrub of used coffee grounds and borax to help descent my skin. Not perfect but helps, and borax (sodium tetraborate) is a mineral that occurs naturally in many areas (like around here for example. Even a town in Central California called Boron, guess why.)

Some aspects of being a "Freegan" (as I've heard it called in Davis, CA) are fun and harmless. Some aspects get you those looks in public. And believe me, Davis has its share. The relatively mild climate, generous social justice orientation of the population, and brilliant STEM students who ended up snapping and taking to the homeless camps make for an interesting vagrant/homeless population. Not only do some of them smell, but Davis had its very own special "Smelly Guy." You could smell him coming half a block away if the breeze was right. I'm not exaggerating at all.

He is your son, but your home is yours. He is how he is by choice, which sucks to say but... that's just the way things are. I don't know what else to say, honestly. Here in the US we have a product you can buy by the gallon, about US$20 per gallon, called "Nature's Miracle." The stuff is amazing, and if you soaked his clothes in it BEFORE WASHING and hung them to dry, repeat treatments might make a difference enough - but you have to use it BEFORE washing with detergent. It doesn't mask smells, it uses enzymes, and it's the wetting/drying that breaks down the smelly organics. NOTE: It can make things smell worse while wet. And how well does it work? Kiddo peed her bed a LOT over the years, we always kept a gallon jug of the stuff in her bedroom, and by the time we moved the mattress was in decent enough shape that we were able to sell it at our pre-moving yard sale. THAT'S how good it is.

Whether the cost of it is worth using over the cost of giving your kid a bit of cash and taking him to a thrift shop, that's your judgement call. And I've put my foot down with Kiddo, and her occasionally questionable personal hygiene awareness, and felt no reason to be nice about it. "NO WAY ARE YOU GETTING IN MY CAR UNTIL YOU CHANGE YOUR PANTS AND UNDERWEAR." Like that.

I wish you strength and compassion in making it through this, and remember that Compassion is not the equivalent of being a pushover when it comes to YOUR needs. Best of outcomes to you.

 

[nlj]

Some aspects of being a "Freegan" (as I've heard it called in Davis, CA) are fun and harmless. Some aspects get you those looks in public. And believe me, Davis has its share. The relatively mild climate, generous social justice orientation of the population, and brilliant STEM students who ended up snapping and taking to the homeless camps make for an interesting vagrant/homeless population. Not only do some of them smell, but Davis had its very own special "Smelly Guy." You could smell him coming half a block away if the breeze was right. I'm not exaggerating at all.

That describes my son really well. Bright student...breakdown...homeless...freegan...smelly guy.

Thanks nefherder - and you're right about compassion not being the equivalent of being a pushover.