I acted on a suspicion

[BusynMember]

I got jobs from restaurants and other non stress work, GN. And no heavy lifting. I'm very happy with them. It is probably worth a call. The visits with DVR guarantee job pats are.going out. DAve is really not for more high level work. It helps those who, for whatever reason, are having trouble finding a starter job or its also good for pre retirees. Not surprised it didn't help you, GN.

Lil, yeah, it could be different state to state. But maybe they can talk your son into being evaluated for learning disabilities. Or mental illness. He is basically a good kid, Lil. There must be something in the way of him and jobs...and, like 99.9% kids they tend to listen to strangers more than us!

 

[Ironbutterfly]

Yeah...I was ticked off at him when I said that. I admit, I've not had the issues of looking for work. I've never been unemployed for any length of time and have had my current job for 22 years.

But I still don't think he's trying hard enough.

He hasn't tried Target or K-Mart.
He hasn't tried all the grocery stores.
He hasn't tried places like car dealerships that do hire people to detail and move cars around and one even had a "No experience necessary, we will train" opening for someone to change oil and top off fluids, etc.
He hasn't tried retail stores at the mall, etc.
He hasn't tried lawn service and landscaping companies.
He hasn't tried the cleaning/janitorial companies.
He has only tried one of the many hotels, and that was for front desk...he hasn't tried housekeeping.
He wouldn't even put in at the local ice-cream shop who had a full-time, $10/hr job because, "They're too busy."
He hasn't tried the florists for delivery guy...he doesn't need a car of his own to drive a delivery van - there was one a while back I told him about, he didn't put in.

So...I don't care if he put in on-line at all the fast food places, he hasn't tried hard enough.

I saw on face-book Job group while back where someone posted, I am a hard worker, but I have a felony, I did my time, I am off probation and have a family to support, does anyone know who will hire someone with a felony on record? There were lot of people who posted of places that would hire. The same for places that don't drug test, same question. Amazing the network on face-book for job leads.

 

[Ironbutterfly]

Yeah...I was ticked off at him when I said that. I admit, I've not had the issues of looking for work. I've never been unemployed for any length of time and have had my current job for 22 years.

But I still don't think he's trying hard enough.

He hasn't tried Target or K-Mart.
He hasn't tried all the grocery stores.
He hasn't tried places like car dealerships that do hire people to detail and move cars around and one even had a "No experience necessary, we will train" opening for someone to change oil and top off fluids, etc.
He hasn't tried retail stores at the mall, etc.
He hasn't tried lawn service and landscaping companies.
He hasn't tried the cleaning/janitorial companies.
He has only tried one of the many hotels, and that was for front desk...he hasn't tried housekeeping.
He wouldn't even put in at the local ice-cream shop who had a full-time, $10/hr job because, "They're too busy."
He hasn't tried the florists for delivery guy...he doesn't need a car of his own to drive a delivery van - there was one a while back I told him about, he didn't put in.

So...I don't care if he put in on-line at all the fast food places, he hasn't tried hard enough.

I just googled this and found :

Here are a few large companies that have been mentioned by current or former employees as being places where drug testing is uncommon, doesn't exist, or is only done for those who drive or operate heavy machinery:

• Google
• Apple
• Facebook
• Twitter
• Microsoft
• Yahoo
• Qualcomm
• Starbucks
• Gap
• Whole Foods Market
• Chipotle Mexican Grill

Of course, many other employers don't drug test. Small businesses, especially, are less likely to have drug-screening policies. And in states that have legalized marijuana, most companies within that particular industry do not drug test.

 

[Jabberwockey]

It is important to know a bit about the company's history, philosophy, and business practices if you are called in for an interview.

That is part of the whole "Looking for work is a full time job" philosophy. Even if you aren't actively putting in applications or following up, you need to be studying up on companies and building networks by cold calling. All things I teach in my class.

Has your son signed up for the Dept. of Vocational Rehab?

In Missouri you have to have a mental or physical disability to qualify for Voc Rehab. Mostly mental.

His best bet is to go to the local Employment Office. They work with Voc Rehab but also have working relationships with the vast majority of the local businesses. I've also suggested that he go there to take the NCRC test (National Career Readiness Certificate) but he doesn't act like he thinks they can help him.

 

[Lil]

Ugh...I just got a text asking if J could store a tote of his belongings in our garage. I said yes, because...why not? We already have stuff in there that belongs to our son's other buddy. (We really need to make them get that crap out of there.) At least this is a tote...easy to move and store.

Today is his last day with the grandparents. I HATE THIS! Not for him, though I hate that too, but for US. He is now homeless. His grandparents are going to Texas I guess, and his cousin is going ... somewhere ... and he's just out. He's been saying for a while that this was coming. At least, he said it to Difficult Child who has said it to me, that J was going to be homeless.

They have no asked if J could stay with us. Thank God. But I'm sure they will at some time. After all, J lived with us for a while in high school and our son should be out of our house by July 1. I don't know how they think they're getting an apt. when they have no income. Son spent the night at J's grandparents' house last night...didn't even pretend he'd be going to work.

Why do I already feel like a bad person when they haven't even asked for him to stay?

 

[Jabberwockey]

Why do I already feel like a bad person when they haven't even asked for him to stay?

Because you're a good person and even though you know it wouldn't work you're tempted to consider it. On that note, check my PM. Eh, for that matter, like I said...I have no problem with him staying with us for a night or two this weekend but he will NOT be moving in with us. If they want to get lippy about it, they will both find themselves fighting the current of Defecation Creek without a water displacement device.

 

[Lil]

Almost 10:30 and he's not up. I guess we're not even pretending he has a job anymore.

 

[BusynMember]

When my darlings slept later than I felt was healthy, I decided to vacuum the floors, including close to their rooms. Hehe.

Have a nice day anyway. This was his decision

 

[Lil]

I woke him up. Said, "It's 10:30. Just making sure you aren't pretending you have a job to go to today." He said, "No." I said ok and walked away.

Neither of us have mentioned it since.

 

[A dad]

I woke him up. Said, "It's 10:30. Just making sure you aren't pretending you have a job to go to today." He said, "No." I said ok and walked away.

Neither of us have mentioned it since.

Is it not saturday? Mine if they had no school and later a job slept until 12pm.

 

[GoingNorth]

Actually, A dad, it's much healthier, both mentally and physically, to get up at the same time every day. This is especially important for children, adolescents, and young adults where the brain is still developing.

 

[Jabberwockey]

The job he used to have started at 11 am, hence the "pretending to have a job to go to" comment.

 

[Lil]

The job he used to have started at 11 am, hence the "pretending to have a job to go to" comment.

Yep. Last time I woke him assert 10:30 when he actually had a job it was panic city.

 

[GoingNorth]

Ah. I mostly worked 3rd shift, so being asleep at 11AM was normal for me. My mother was probably relieved when I moved out as she no longer had to face me cooking dinner at 7AM when she got up. Said it made her nauseous.

 

[Jabberwockey]

Yeah, I used to work midnight's. I ate my dinner at work so that wasn't an issue but there were a few times when Lil made fish for dinner. Normally, her cooking when I woke didn't really bother me but these made me nauseous.

 

[GoingNorth]

Stu used to make 2-4 servings of whatever he was having for dinner (no complaints here, he was a chef) and would pack them up individually for me to take to work with me. He didn't have hangups about what i was eating when.

Though, in Germany, when I pulled out the salted herring and the Aged, fully-ripened Appenzeller cheese, he pulled off the Autobahn into a rest area, and told me and my stinking snacks to get the hell out of the car.

 

[Lil]

Though, in Germany, when I pulled out the salted herring and the Aged, fully-ripened Appenzeller cheese, he pulled off the Autobahn into a rest area, and told me and my stinking snacks to get the hell out of the car.

LOL I totally don't blame him!

 

[pasajes4]

salted herring and the Aged, fully-ripened Appenzeller cheese

Too delicious........I love herring and the stronger the cheese the better. Throw in some black bread and wine and you have a feast.

 

[GoingNorth]

Had the black bread, the good stuff made with nothing but cracked rye, water, and yeast. It's a bit much to get used to if you weren't brought up eating it as the taste and texture are VERY different from USA bread. I love the stuff and was able to find a grocery that sells it. To make it perfect, you also need sliced sweet onions, which I didn't have on that occasions. Years later,, back in Chicago, I got thrown out on the back fire escape for eating a "blind robin" in the apartment. ("Blind Robins" are fermented, salted, smoked and dried herring. They also smell like you'd expect.)

Not wine. A good, monastery-brewed BEER! (which, since if you visit the monasteries, they usually have a snack bar and sell the beer in 1 ltr steins, I will be asleep in my wurst and pommes frites before I finish half of my beer.)

 

[Alaska]

Wow. I live in denial. I have heard all of his arguments. I didn't help enough. I gave more to brothers than him. I did not try. He did nothing to help himself and I feel so sorry for him every day. He is on the streets. He seems so young and childish. I don't know what yo to do. I feel like I am sinking