I didnt know my husband was bald when I first met him. He had lovely longish thick hair but always wore a baseball cap. Getting a clue was not one of my strong traits so I never wondered why he always wore a cap. I thought he looked cute with it on. One day after about a month of dating we went out to eat and he took his cap off at the table. I think my jaw dropped to the floor and I stared. I could see him getting red initje face and I finally stammered probably in an embarassing way "You...you're BALD!" The jaw was still hanging. He sat back and said "Yeah. So?" I laughed. He laughed. He still wears a baseball cap everywhere. Well it looks like a baseball cap but its not related to sports. Now my son in law to be is 26 and you can already tell he is going to lose his hair. He also wears baseball cap shaped hats everywhere. I vote for a baseball the cap. They dont offend or scare anyone. Just dont wear a Bears cap in Packer country.....haha. Just kidding. You may get some ugly looks but nothing more. Now....I am pretty neutral about clothes but we are over three hours away from a big city (Milwaukee) and I dont think the culture is the same here. No real gangbangers, just fakes. A lot of people wear hoodies here. I have a favorite one that says "Dog Is Good" on the front with a picture of a chihuahua underneath the words. My kids have hoodies. We live in the COLD. So they are practical But they cant wear them to work. I dont tell my kids how to dress or wear their hair. I wouldnt go there unless it was Satanic clotjes or KKK or like that. Color your hair blue. Get a tatoo. I dont interfer with those decisuons and never did. I dont think we can force them to dress a certain way anyhow. I dont think I would touch that even if the grown kid moved in with me. But I lived near Chicago half of my life and a hoodie is probably more menacing near a big city. Not that we have no crime. Drugs are bad all over this area so we have an alarm system and there are robberies, but murder isnt part of here. I think if J were my son and he was just playing with my emotions Id be quite angry. If he actually saw the liver doctor and made a neuropsychologist appointment I would consider these two huge steps for the good! Keep us posted, hon. We all care about you and J. I feel as if J were a nephew of mine. I want both of you to be ok. Big hugs and cuppa Starbucks!!!