I think I am going to be sick....

[everywoman]

I had to respond to this---my first husband was 17 years older than me---not a good match but the age difference didn't play a part of it---#2 was 7 years older, and again, age made no difference. I think we have to look at the person and see what he/she is really like---

On another note---easy child is working as a bartender. She has a regular customer who is 80. He is in stage 4 cancer and does not have long to live. He comes in almost every day. Last week she was his dinner date for a formal dinner and he attended her Christmas party at work as her guest this weekend. Can you imagine the comments on that one? LOL.

 

[PatriotsGirl]

I had to respond to this---my first husband was 17 years older than me---not a good match but the age difference didn't play a part of it---#2 was 7 years older, and again, age made no difference. I think we have to look at the person and see what he/she is really like---

On another note---easy child is working as a bartender. She has a regular customer who is 80. He is in stage 4 cancer and does not have long to live. He comes in almost every day. Last week she was his dinner date for a formal dinner and he attended her Christmas party at work as her guest this weekend. Can you imagine the comments on that one? LOL.

I am actually not bothered by the age difference anymore. It was a shock at first, but I have gotten over it. It is the fact that she tried playing him up to be this "businessman", clean cut, good guy image thing. And then I saw that recent picture and yeah, he definitely does not look like that anymore and I think I came to a judgement on him based on that. Probably a correct one, BUT, it really isn't my business anymore and I think I overstepped my bounds yesterday and now she isn't talking to me. I am having a hard time being the parent of an adult now. I don't know why. She hasn't lived here for longer than a month in well over a year. But I contantly feel the need to check up on her and express my opinions. How does one make that transition?

 

[hearts and roses]

It is definitely not about the age, although I had my own concerns with difficult child and E. He is 9 years older than her and while 22 to 31 doesn't sound as bad, when she was 19 and he was 28, it gave me pause. We've come to know him very well over the past 3 years, his family, etc. He is a kind loving man and is very good to difficult child, helped her mature I think on many levels. They click, they compliment one another - it's weird but it works for them. On Friday he's asking her to marry him and we're all very excited about it!

Now, that said, Age may mean nothing, but Character means everything. You trusted your mommy gut and sought out the truth about this guy and now you know, you understand.

Sending lots and lots of positive supportive hugs...practice detachment, it will be your own personal sanity saver here. I've had to do it with both difficult child and easy child many times and the serenity prayer is posted all over my house and car and work monitor to help me!